菲比 你还在等 Oh, Phoebe, are you still on hold?
我两小时前就该打给我爸了 I was supposed to call my dad back, like, two hours ago.
喔 对 他打进来过 Oh, yeah. He clicked on.
他说你有空就打给他 He said call him as soon as you get a chance.
- 他在甲乙丙 - 什么是甲乙丙 - He's at Flimbees. - What's Flimbees?
我记不起正确答案时都这么说 Oh, yeah, that's the word I use when I can't remember the real thing.
挂电话 够了 快点 Okay, hang up. That's it. Come on.
不要 瑞秋 他们就是要我放弃 No. Rachel, that's what they want me to do.
保证书明天就过期了 要是无法接通… My warranty expires tomorrow. If I don't get through...
他们就不会免费修理我的破电话 ...they're not gonna fix my crappy, broken phone for free.
不能让他们赢 这是我们与他们的对决 We cannot let them win. It's us versus them.
没错 Yes.
- 嘿 - 嗨 - Hey. - Hi.
听着 我得再确认一次今晚的票 你们都要几张 Uh, listen, I gotta double-check for tickets tonight. Who got what?
- 我要一张 - 我要一张 - I have one. - I have one.
我要两张 我要带彼特去 I need two. I'm bringing Pete.
我的男朋友 My boyfriend.
我现在有男朋友了 I have a boyfriend now.
你两张 罗斯 你呢 Two it is. Ross, how about you?
我也要两张 Uh, yeah, I, uh... I also need two.
真的吗 第二个是谁 Really? Who's number two?
第二个是谁 Whose Number Two?
下水道工人的高难度游戏 One of the more difficult games sewer workers play.
没什么 反正有个人 Uh, no one, it's just this person.
是约会对象吗 Like a date-type person?
算是吧 是工作上认识的女生 Yeah, kind of. Uh, it's this woman from work.
希望不会太奇怪 不会吧 瑞秋 I hope that won't be too weird. Will it, Rach?
一点也不会 其实我也要带人去 No. No, not at all. I was actually gonna bring someone myself so...
但是你只要一张 But you said one ticket.
我是说我再多要一张 I meant me plus one.
好 还有谁是多一张的 Okay. Did, uh, you guys mean you plus one?
- 好 晚上见 - 好 - All right. I'll see you tonight. - Okay.
- 好 拜 - 拜 - Okay. Bye-bye. - Bye.
拜拜 Bye-bye.
我得找个约会对象 Okay, I need a date.
对了 你们终于要见到凯特了 Oh, hey. You guys are finally gonna get to meet Kate.
我借了你的古龙水 希望她会喜欢 And I, uh, borrowed some of your cologne. I hope she likes it.
你在干嘛 不会有结果的 What are you doing? That's never gonna happen.
- 她在跟别人交往 - 而且我没有古龙水 - She's seeing somebody. - Yeah. And I don't have any cologne.
- 刮胡膏旁边那一瓶 - 鸭子的除虫药 - Green bottle next to the shaving cream. - Oh. Worm medicine for the duck.
# 没有人告诉你活着有多累 # # So no one told you life was gonna be this way #
# 上班受罪 口袋空空 爱情变累赘 # # Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A. #
# 寂寞又潦倒 受气又受累 # # It's like you're always stuck in second gear #
# 日复一日 年复一年 # # When it hasn't been your day, #
# 时运不济 活着受罪 # # your week, your month, or even your year #
# 你我永不离弃 # # but I'll be there for you #
# 纵有狂风暴雨 # # When the rain starts to pour #
# 你我永不离弃 # # I'll be there for you #
# 支持一如往昔 # # Like I've been there before #
# 你我永不离弃 # # I'll be there for you #
# 你我相偎相依 # # 'Cause you're there for me too #
- 拿去 这件给你穿 - 谢谢 - Here you go. You can wear this. - Thanks.
好 Okay.
我把电话放在桌子上 Oh, I'm setting the phone down.
但是我没挂线 But I'm still here.
不要走开 我没挂线 Just don't go anywhere. I'm still here.
不要转线 我没挂线 等我一下 Don't switch or anything, because I'm right here. Just one sec.
等一下 One sec. One second.
- 等等 一下就好… - 菲比 - Wait. One second. Just... - Phoebe?
怎样摩妮卡 我好害怕 What? Monica, I'm scared.
小姐 那是袖子 Okay. Honey, that's a sleeve, okay?
而且我们有免持功能 And we also have speakerphone.
请不要挂断 Please stay on the line.
我们很重视您的来电 Your call is important to us.
你得挂线 因为我们要迟到了 You gotta hang up. Because we're gonna be late.
谢谢您的耐心 您的电话将下一个被接听 Thank you for your patience. You're the next caller.
太好了 我是下一个 Yes. Yes. I'm the next caller.
你差点让我挂掉 You were gonna have me hang up.
嘿 Hey.
可以带小鸡和小鸭去剧院吗 Can you take a duck and a chick to the theater?
- 当然不行 - 不行 - Of course not. - No.
我只是想让别人告诉他们 Okay, I just wanted them to hear it from somebody else.
（"节礼日"）
- 嗨 瑞秋 你好吗 - 嗨 你好 - Hey. Hey, Rach. Hi. - Oh, hi, how are you?
- 很好 - 嘿 - Good. - Hey. Ha, ha.
- 看来我们最早到 - 看样子是的 - Ahem. Looks like we're the first ones here. - Yeah, looks that way.
第一批来的 First ones here.
- 汤米 这是罗斯 - 罗斯 这是汤米 Hmm. Oh, Tommy, this is Ross. Ross, Tommy.
- 抱歉 这是凯琳 - 凯琳… - Hey. - Oh, I'm sorry. This is Cailin. Cailin...
对不起 Sorry.
放开 And break.
我要去一趟洗手间 Okay, uh, I think I'm gonna run to the ladies' room.
- 我去找座位 - 我跟你去 - Okay. I'll get our seats. - I'll join you.
这真是… So, uh... Well, this is, uh...
有点尴尬 This is awkward.
是吗 Yeah?
因为瑞秋和我交往过 Well, you know, because Rachel and I used to go out. Ha, ha.
我不知道 Oh, I didn't know that.
那这才叫尴尬 Well, then this is awkward.
- 座位是… - 应该是这里 - So, what do you? Oh. Yeah. - I think we're here. Yeah.
打扰一下 对不起 Excuse me. I'm sorry.
你们好像坐到我们的位子了 I think you may be in our seats.
应该没有吧 Um, no, I don't think so.
- 可以看一下你的票吗 - 当然可以 - Could we take a look at your ticket? - Sure.
没错 这是D13 Yeah. Yeah, see, this says, "D-13."
- 而… - 我以为… - And... - Oh, well, I thought that...
你以为 是吧 你以为也没有用 白痴 You thought, huh? Yeah, well, that didn't really work out too well for you. Idiot!
你是有病吗 上面印的是D13 好吗 What are you, a moron? Huh? It says, "D-13." Okay?
你被双数包围了 你都没有察觉到吗 Look, you're surrounded by even numbers. Does that give you some clue?
- 带位的人说… - 带位的人当然对了 - Well, the usher told me... - Oh. Oh, the usher must be right.
他们受过严格训练嘛 滚 What, with all his training they go through. Get out!
拿去 Here.
- 你要坐走道吗 - 不用了 - Hey, man, you want the aisle? - No, I'm good.
（路西尔•洛泰剧场）
- 他来了 - 我们的明星来了 - There he is. - There's our star.
你演得好棒 You were great.
你们觉得怎样 So? So? What'd you think?
跟两裸女坐翘翘板那出剧有得拼 Almost as good as the play with the two naked girls on the seesaw.
- 我没有演 - 我知道 - I wasn't in that. - I know.
嘿 凯特 各位 她是凯特 Hey, Kate, listen I want you to meet everybody. Everybody, this is Kate.
- 借过 甜心 - 嗨 - Excuse me. Excuse me. Sweetheart. - Hi.
过来 Come.
那就是你喜欢的女生 So that's the girl you like.
说真的 瑞秋的男伴是神经病 I'm telling you, this guy Rachel is with is crazy, okay?
他对陌生人大吼大叫 He viciously screamed at total strangers.
我觉得他很糟糕 I think he's bad news.
等一下 你不喜欢瑞秋的约会对象 Wait a minute, wait a minute. You don't like the guy Rachel's dating?
真奇怪啊 Well, that's odd.
嘿 萝伦 各位 这是凯特的候补演员萝伦 Oh, hey, Lauren. Uh, you guys, this is Kate's understudy, Lauren.
- 嗨 - 嗨 天哪 你好眼熟 - Hi. - Hey, gosh, you look so familiar.
我们在你那栋楼的走廊上见过 Oh, yeah. I ran into you in the hallway in your building.
就在我跟乔伊上床之后 他第二天就甩了我 It was right after I slept with Joey. He dumped me the next day.
你们是怎么认识的 So how'd you guys meet?
简单的说 我追了她两个月 Well, uh, the short version is, I pursued her for a couple of months.
给她一张两万美元的支票后就搞定了 Then I gave her a check for $20,000 and she was mine.
复杂点说 我因为他说话太简单 而甩了他 Yeah, and in the long version, I dump him for telling people the short version.
乔伊 宝贝 你太棒了 Joey, sweetheart, you were fabulous.
各位 这是我的经纪人伊斯特 Hey, you guys, this is my agent, Estelle.
你们好吗 How do you do?
你们两位女孩太棒了 Oh, you two girls were outstanding.
她们有经纪人吗 Do they have representation?
她们没有演 They weren't in the play.
- 我们不是演员 - 真可惜 - Huh. We're not actors. - Oh. What a shame.
她的脸蛋加上她的胸部 Because with her face and her chest...
我可以捧出个明星来 ...I could really put something together.
可以借我吗 Could I borrow it?
嗨 记得我吗 Hi. Remember me?
是你 汤米在排队上厕所 Hi. Yeah. Ahem, Tommy's in line for the bathroom...
有人插队 我觉得他要抓狂了 ...and someone just cut in front of him. I think he's gonna snap.
- 罗斯 我要走了 - 走 为什么 - Ross, I'm gonna go. - Go? Why?
不知道 或许是因为… I don't know. Could be because I don't feel like...
我不想整晚等着看一个人会不会发疯 ...standing around all night, waiting for some guy who may or may not scream.
但是 凯琳… Oh, but Cailin...
他绝对会发疯 ...he definitely will scream.
再见 罗斯 Goodbye, Ross.
走就走吧 Oh, go, all right.
好了 大家 Here we go, people.
"节礼日"… Ahem, "Boxing Day.
路西尔•洛泰剧场…" The Lucille Lortel Theatre..."
"乔伊•崔比亚尼… 他的表现参差不齐 "Joey Tribbiani gives an uneven performance.
不过崔比亚尼还不是这出戏最差的一环" But Mr. Tribbiani is not the worst thing in this production."
太好了 Yes. Ha-ha-ha!
"凯特•米勒差劲做作的诠释实在可笑" "Kate Miller's awkward and mannered portrayal is laughable."
来了 "导演部分… Here it is. "The direction...
马歇•汤恩导演…" ...by Marshall Townend is..."
谢谢各位 Thank you, boys and girls.
你们毁了我的一生 You've ruined my life.
请用我妈做的蟹饼… Please stuff your talentless faces...
填满你们没有才华的肚子 ...with my mother's crab cakes.
借过 Excuse me.
我可以留着吧 Does anyone mind if I save this?
- 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey.
- 戏演完了 - 你去了哪里 - Oh, is the play over? - Yeah, where were you?
谢谢您的耐心 Thank you for your patience.
您的电话将下一个被接听 You're the next caller.
五个小时前你就是下一个被接听 你一定快疯了 You were the next caller five hours ago. You must be going crazy.
我有找事情做 No, I've kept myself busy.
对了 我把你们房里的东西对调了 Oh, okay, yeah, I put your stuff in her room and her stuff in your room.
嘿 Hey.
你还好吗 You okay?
好极了 Fabulous.
剧评家只是当不成演员的人 Listen, drama critics, they're nothing but people who couldn't make it as actors.
- 你知道你该怎么做吗 - 去当剧评家 - You know what you should do? - Become a drama critic.
我受伤了 I am hurt.
祝你们两家… A plague...
发生灾难 ...on both your houses.
对了 他看完我的剧评之后把我甩了 By the way, he dumped me tonight after he read my review.
真过分 Oh, classy.
是啊 Yep.
是啊 我还真有眼光 I sure know how to pick them, huh?
我为了这出戏放弃一个连续剧 You know I gave up a part on a soap for this?
我也放弃了一个工作 Yeah, I, uh... I gave up a job too.
- 什么工作 - 替猫咪剪指甲 - Really? What? - Uh, declawing cats.
这样吧 我陪你走回家 Hey, tell you what, let me walk you home.
我们去每个报摊 烧掉所有的"时代杂志"和"邮报" We'll stop by every newsstand and burn every copy of their Times and The Post.
- 为什么要烧"邮报" - 你没看"邮报" - Why The Post? - You didn't see The Post?
- 没有 你看了 - 没有 怎么了 - No. You? - No. Why?
你真的觉得那些剧评是在嫉妒我 You really think these newspapers are just jealous of me?
绝对是 你有才华 长得又美 Oh, absolutely. You're talented and you're good-looking.
你人好又可爱 Aw, you're sweet and cute.
我知道 所以他们才攻击我 I know. That's why they trashed me.
- 等一下 - 怎么了 - Wait. Wait a minute. - What?
我实在搞不懂你 I don't get you.
你先是讨厌我 I mean, first you hate me.
然后跟我上床 Then you sleep with me.
然后你又跟我撇清关系 现在又想要我了 Then you want nothing to do with me. Now you want me again?
怎样你没跟女演员约过会吗 What? So you never went out with an actress before?
凯特 你喜欢我吗 Kate, do you even like me?
- 当然喜欢 - 那你之前为什么拒绝我 - Of course I do. - So how come you blew me off?
- 为什么要跟他在一起 - 我不知道 - You know, how come you were with him? - I don't know.
我就是这样 I just do this.
我总是要挑那个最聪明的… I always have to pick, like, the smartest guy...
或是最有才华的 ...or the most talented guy.
我为什么不能挑你这种人 Why can't I just pick someone like you?
谢了 Thanks.
你知道我的意思 You know what I mean.
我是说最体贴的人 I mean, like, the sweetest guy.
你真的好… Joey, you're just so...
你好… You're so...
好… ...so...
好… Okay. Okay, okay. Ha, ha.
来 把你的脚抬上来 Here we go. Let's get your feet up there.
晚安 凯特 Good night, Kate.
祝你好梦 Sweet dreams.
我把桶子放在这里 免得你想吐 I'm gonna put this can right here in case you have to hurl.
请不要挂断 Please stay on the line.
我们很重视您的来电 Your call is very important to us.
你已经二十四小时没睡了 去睡吧 Pheebs, you've been up for 24 hours. Go to sleep, honey.
- 这样很不健康 - 不 我很好 - This isn't healthy. - No, no, I'm fine.
你知道为什么吗 因为我吃了核黄素 And you know why? Because of all the riboflavin.
- 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey.
这是昨晚那套衣服 Didn't you have that outfit on last night?
对 我在凯特家过夜 但是什么都没发生 Yeah. I stayed at Kate's, but, uh, nothing happened.
嘿 菲比 你怎么没来 Hey, Pheebs, where were you?
我很抱歉 我一定会去看你演戏 I'm so, so sorry, Joey. I am definitely gonna see your play.
我发誓 你的戏对我们很重要 谢谢你的耐心 I swear, your play is very important to us. Thank you for your patience.
我下一个就会去看你的戏 Your play is the next play I'm gonna see.
- 你跟凯特怎么样 - 感觉好棒 - Anyway, how'd it go with Kate? - Oh, it was great.
我陪她走回家 Yeah, I walked her home...
我们之间心有灵犀 ...and it was amazing how much we connected, you know?
后来她昏过去了 Then she passed out.
但是她醒来之后 But then she woke up. Yeah.
我们聊了一整晚 And we stayed up all night talking.
我们现在为彼此疯狂 And now we're, like, totally crazy about each other.
- 你经历了"爱之夜" - 什么 - Joey, you had "the night." - What?
当两个人发现他们坠人爱河 When two people finally realize their feelings for each other...
他们会聊上很久 弄清楚对方的一切 ...and they talk for hours and they learn all about the other person.
是吗 You think?
- 你知道她家人的事吗 - 两个兄弟 一个死了 - Ha, ha. Did you learn about her family? - Two brothers. One died.
- 太棒了 - 好耶 - Yes. - Yeah.
这是吧台那位女士请的 This is from the woman at the bar.
对不起 她认错人了 Sorry. She thought you were somebody else.
- 现在几点 - 一点 - What time is it? - One.
七点十五分 Seven-fifteen.
我的表坏了 Watch doesn't work.
汤米快来了 我们要去吃午饭 Tommy's supposed to be here soon. We're going to lunch.
听着 我本来不想说的 但是… Look. Look, I wasn't gonna say anything to you, but...
好吧 我觉得 你不该跟汤米继续来往 All right, I don't think you should be seeing Tommy anymore.
- 是吗 - 对 - You don't? - No.
那家伙态度很恶劣 非常恶劣 你应该离他远一点 The guy is mean. I mean, really mean. I think you should stay away from him.
或许我应该离所有男人远一点 Hmm. Or maybe I should stay away from all men.
我不只是在嫉妒 No, it's not just because I'm jealous.
我不是在嫉妒 I mean, I'm not, I'm not. I'm not jealous, okay?
那家伙… Look, the guy, he screamed...
对坐错位子的夫妇大吼 ...he actually screamed at this couple sitting in our seats.
对啊 落幕的时候… Yeah, and at the end of the play, he...
他还站起来用力拍打他的双手 He got up, you know, and he just started, like, banging his hands together.
好 你们不信就算了 Okay, fine. Fine. You don't want to believe me, no, that's fine.
- 我们开玩笑的 - 罗斯 - We're kidding. Ross. - Ross. Ross.
没有人相信我 你们都当我在搞笑 No one believe me. I'm Mr. Funny to you. Mr. Funny.
抱歉 汤米 Sorry, Tommy.
杯子里是什么 What's in the cup, Ross?
杯子里是什么 - Um. - What is in the cup?
是咖啡 Okay, it's coffee.
冰咖啡吗 请告诉我是冰咖啡 Iced coffee? Tell me it's iced coffee.
- 是热… - 热咖啡 - It's hot... - Hot coffee!
你这个白痴 你想拿热咖啡泼我 You idiot! You gonna spill hot coffee all over me, huh?
你是发型很鸟的鸟白痴吗 What are you? Just a big, stupid doofy idiot with a doofy idiot hairdo?
你最喜欢夏天的什么 What's your favorite thing about summertime?
去海边玩 天色很晚才变暗 Hmm, going to the beach when it stays light real late.
没错 Yeah.
- 嘿 - 汤米 - Hey. - Tommy.
你最喜欢夏天的什么 Say, what's your favorite thing about summer?
不知道 或许刚除过的草地味道吧 Ooh, I don't know. Probably the, uh, smell of freshly cut grass.
- 这个好 - 没错 - Aw, that's a good one. - Yeah.
抱歉 迟到 我的鸡和鸭吵架 场面很乱 Hey, sorry. Sorry I'm late. My duck and my chick had a fight. It was ugly.
我们特地等你 上场吧 - Look, we held the curtain for you. Let's go. - Okay.
维克 你上哪去了 宝贝 Vic. Where have you been, baby?
- 凯特呢 - 她在洛杉矶找到工作 - Where's Kate? - She got a job in L.A.
什么 What?
我等了你一整夜 你上哪去了 I've been waiting up all night for you. Where have you been?
你上哪去了 维克 Where have you been, Vic?
去窗子旁边 Oh, uh... Go to the window.
我去车上拿个东西给你看 I wanna run down to the truck and show you something.
你要给我看什么 What do you got down there, Vic?
帆布底下藏了什么 What do you got under that tarp?
她什么时候走 When is she leaving?
今晚 你在干什么 Tonight. What are you doing?
我马上上来 I'm coming up.
可以借电话吗 Hey, you mind if I use the phone?
去对面用我们的 因为她… Why don't you use ours across the hall because she...
有点问题 ...has problems.
谢谢 Thanks.
汤米 对不起 我差点把热咖啡泼到你身上 Sorry, Tommy. I almost spilled this hot coffee on you.
但是你没有 Ha, ha. Yeah, but you didn't. Ha, ha.
没错 但是… 这是热的 No, but it's hot.
别闹了 罗斯 再闹下去就没意思了 Ross, would you just stop it? It's getting really old.
居然没有人相信我 I can't believe no one believes me.
我相信你 I do. I believe you.
真的 You do, Pheebs?
对 但是我也相信我会是下一个 Yeah. But I also believed her when she said I was next.
嘿 Ooh, hey.
嗨 小东西 Hey there, little fella.
小毛球 你好吗 Mr. Fuzzy-Man, how you doing?
恶心死了 Gross.
白痴 Idiot!
小白痴 黄毛生物 Stupid, little, fuzzy, yellow creature!
你看我 我好可爱 我是恶心的小鸡 "Oh, look at me. I'm so cute. I'm a little chick who's disgusting!"
笨蛋 你怎么还没绝种 God, you're so stupid! How are you not yet extinct?
你叫什么叫 What are you quacking about?
白痴唐老鸭 Dumb Donald Dodo!
离鸭子远一点 Step away from the duck.
很抱歉 小鸡鸡 Ooh, sorry, little Mr. Chickadee.
谁叫你在我手上大便 Sorry you went doody in my hand!
看来我们没搞头了 Well, I guess we're not going out anymore.
天啊 Man!
- 乔伊 - 凯特 - Joey. - Kate.
乔伊 幸好赶上了 我一直找不到你 I'm so glad I caught you. I couldn't find you before.
洛杉矶是怎么回事 What's going on? What's all this about L. A?
"综合医院"还是要我 They still want me for General Hospital.
那…我们呢 But what about us?
昨晚感觉很棒 Last night was wonderful.
但我不能为了你留下来 But I can't stay here just for you.
那就为了博物馆留下来 Well, so stay for the museums.
- 对不起 - 乔伊上场 - I'm sorry. - Joey, on-stage.
可不可以至少等到这场落慕 Well, can you stay till the end of the play?
我陪你去机场 我想跟你道别 I mean, I'll go to the airport with you. I want to say goodbye.
维克 你在哪里 Where are you, Vic?
一小时后的班机 我得走了 Flight's in an hour. I gotta go.
维克 Vic?
- 维克 - 等一下 - Vic! - In a minute.
维克 就这样了吗 So this is it, Victor?
我想是的 Yeah. I guess it is.
听我说… Listen, I, uh...
我必须赶快说再见 因为我的心好痛 I gotta say goodbye, and I gotta say it quick because this is killing me.
我要你知道 我永远不会忘记你 One thing you gotta know is that I will never forget you.
但是你有你该做的事 But you got things you have to do now.
而我也是 And so do I.
所以… And so...
我要登上太空船 ...I'm gonna get on this spaceship...
前往布粒刚七号星寻找替代燃料 ...and I'm gonna go to Blaargon-7 in search of alternative fuels.
等我两百年后回来 But when I return 200 years from now...
你早已不在人世 ...you'll be long gone...
而我却一点都不会老 ...but I won't have aged at all.
所以请告诉你的曾曾孙女 So you tell your great, great granddaughter...
叫她找我 ...to look me up.
因为 雅卓安… Because, Adrianne...
亲爱的… ...baby...
我绝对会想认识她 ...I'm gonna want to meet her.
别了 维克 So long, Vic.
菲比 已经两天了 Phoebe, it's been two days.
我知道 Yeah, I know.
幸好是801免费电话 Ugh, good thing it's one of those 801 numbers, right?
800才是免付费电话 801是犹他州码 Phoebe, 800 is toll free. 801 is Utah.
不… No, no, no.
一定是免付费 大公司都有免付费专线 It has to be 800 because all those big companies have 800 numbers.
每个… Every...
犹他州大公司都是801开头 Yeah, every big Utah-based company has one.
菲比 Phoebe.
真的很抱歉 我会付钱的 Sorry. I'm so sorry. I will pay you back.
她还是不挂电话 And yet she's still not hanging up the phone.
- 挂掉吧 - 挂电话 - Hang up. - Hang up the phone.
好啦 Fine. Fine.
怎么了 What?
我好像把它摔坏了 Well, I think I broke it.
没关系 你们可以打这个号码 But that's all right. Here's the number where you can call.