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<font color=#38B0DE>-=伊甸园美剧 http://bbs.sfileydy.com=-
-=伊甸园字幕站 http://ytet.org=-
荣誉出品
本字幕仅供学习交流，严禁用于商业途径</font>

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<font color=#38B0DE>-=YTET-伊甸园字幕组=-
翻译: 十二方 郁闷ing
校对: 黄沙舞风 时间轴: YTET-Vicky8800
720P iTunes:wss0427</font>

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<font color=#38B0DE>左右不逢缘
第二季 第三集</font>

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在中部地区 男性有一套约定俗成的规矩

5
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只握手 不拥抱

6
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自己能做的事绝不花钱雇人来做

7
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从不去看医生 除非...

8
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嗯 就是不去看医生

9
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我不会去看医生的

10
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拜托 只是个体检

11
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听着 下个月就会提高保险自负金了

12
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趁现在便宜 要生病就赶紧的

13
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嘿 如果发生了什么

14
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我自己就能搞定

15
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Mike受的医学教育和我的不尽相同

16
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我的心脏不跳了

17
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哦 好了

18
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这儿什么时候长了颗痣?

19
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肩膀又脱臼了

20
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啊哈! 这下好多了

21
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Mike你不能再这样
把自己胡乱修理一下就算了

22
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你越来越老了 应该做常规检查
我就去做了啊

23
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是啊 可不还是没治好你那一身女人病

24
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好吧 我本来不想说什么的
但你已经日暮西山了

25
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日暮西山?

26
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Oz医生也说过 男人老得更快
(一档讲述健康问题的脱口秀节目)

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看你那一头花白的头发

28
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白发可是越来越多了

29
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因为我不想戴着塑料手套 抓着喷瓶

30
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像你一样的给自己抹染发剂

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哦 拜托 我比你更会照顾自己

32
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人们都说我看上去比你年轻十岁

33
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哪些人?

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你姐姐吗 在你们自认为

35
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自己都还很年轻苗条的时候说的?

36
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不管怎么样 Mike

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你得去做体检 谈话结束

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我可不想你早死
让我一个人照顾孩子们

39
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Heck夫人!

40
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你永远都是那么漂亮

41
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你听到了吗 Mike? 他刚刚...

42
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没关系 你们准备做什么?

43
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学校布置的任务

44
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我们准备弄个巨大的科学工程

45
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大概值半学年的学分

46
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所以我这周没时间干家务了

47
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嗯 我们会想办法过活的

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小Brickster!

49
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见到你真高兴

50
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你想要巧克力棒?

51
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来 给你个

52
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哦 我真希望我能吃
只是我不想破坏法律

53
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什么意思? 你吃糖并不违法啊

54
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但是我妈说过...

55
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哦 是呀

56
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我能要这个吗?

57
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放下 Brick

58
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- 为什么?
- 因为 呃...

59
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因为总统规定10岁以下的孩子吃糖是违法的

60
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你骗我?! 我的亲生母亲骗我?!

61
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听着 Brick 事情是这样的

62
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你知道我给总统写了多少封信吗?

63
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他肯定以为我疯了!

64
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疯了

65
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等等 你撒谎了 你的头发却没有掉光

66
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这也是骗我的?!

67
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欢迎入伙

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她曾经告诉我 在放"幸运之轮"时候
说话的小孩会瞎掉 (抽奖节目)

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Brick 过来 我很抱歉

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妈 你说你会开车送我去当保姆的

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她说过好多事情!

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Sean

73
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如果你有个哥哥

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你最终会对他的某个朋友产生兴趣

75
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对于Sue 这就发生在今年夏天

76
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我正要走 我可以载你一程

77
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走吧

78
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我要坐副驾驶位

79
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除非你要在副驾驶位上放书...

80
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那我就坐在后座上好了

81
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或者 我们就看着办得了

82
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有人找我的话 我就在Sean的车里

83
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我想为我的丈夫预定体检

84
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不 你们不会有他的任何记录的

85
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就新建个叫Mike的文档好了

86
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星期二? 好的 谢谢

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Brick你在干什么?

88
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我已经做这个鬼脸超过一个小时了
你猜发生了什么?

89
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我的脸没有僵住!

90
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喂?

91
00:03:38,620 --> 00:03:40,040
我这儿出了点状况

92
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嗯 怎么了 Sue?

93
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妈妈 你还骗了我什么? 还有什么?

94
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等下 谁在说话? 是不是Sean回来了?

95
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不是 怎么了?

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如果他回来了 帮我跟他打个招呼

97
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对了 Markley一家没给我准备纸尿裤

98
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你能不能去商店帮我买点?

99
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尿片已经超负荷了 如果漏了的话

100
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我的越野运动衫就毁了

101
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现在?

102
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因为我正忙着打扫卫生...

103
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也许我一会儿就去打扫了 你又不知道

104
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不好意思

105
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请问纸尿裤在哪里?

106
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请跟我来

107
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哦 好的

108
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谢谢啊

109
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真的很感谢

110
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- 我实在是有点...
- 在这儿

111
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<i>成人纸尿裤</i>

112
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呃 我奶奶喜欢用这种

113
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估计你该用小号的

114
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好吧 等等

115
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你觉得是我要用纸尿裤?

116
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哦 这真是...

117
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哦 天哪 你以为我多大了?

118
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我能不能不回答这个问题?

119
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听着 虽然我打喷嚏时可能会尿失禁

120
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但是我不需要尿布
你有看到白发吗?

121
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没! 是100%的棕栗色

122
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染发剂在12号过道

123
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我的意思是 拜托

124
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这是给...

125
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老年膀胱失禁用的

126
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我看起来像老年人?

127
00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:08,130
我想怀孕就怀孕

128
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是我自己不愿意

129
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这是给那些骨头吱吱嘎嘎
比我老得多的人用的

130
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无意冒犯

131
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不好意思 我有点慌张

132
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我有个女儿和尿裤子的宝宝

133
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我明白 我也是个外祖母

134
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我不是外祖母!

135
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赶紧带我去尿布货架... 给婴儿用的

136
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我也可以怀上的婴儿!

137
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太尴尬了

138
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好吧 难道就真的这样了?

139
00:05:41,140 --> 00:05:42,980
我现在看起来像祖母?

140
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我需要给姐姐打个电话

141
00:05:44,620 --> 00:05:47,140
不 你不需要 有我呢...

142
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并且我在这里郑重的告诉你

143
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你是个充满活力的年轻女人

144
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- 富于美和生命力
- 是呀 是呀

145
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别光听我说 眼见为实

146
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我上周二拍的这个漂亮女人是谁?

147
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哦 还有这张 斑驳的阳光洒在她脸上?

148
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还有这位在复印机旁吃甜甜圈的可爱少女?

149
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哇哦 Bob 你有好多我的照片啊

150
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不光是你

151
00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:12,530
还有Mike

152
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孩子们

153
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哦 夜幕中的你家

154
00:06:16,900 --> 00:06:18,720
如此安逸宁静

155
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想看圣诞节那天的吗?

156
00:06:20,700 --> 00:06:21,810
不 谢谢 Bob

157
00:06:25,020 --> 00:06:26,620
它在吃我的眼睛 杀了它!

158
00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:29,360
爆头! 砰! 啪!

159
00:06:30,850 --> 00:06:32,450
Heck先生 你好吗?

160
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很好 Sean
Axl 我以为你们有个很费劲的作业

161
00:06:35,020 --> 00:06:36,380
你们为何不停止浪费时间 动手开始呢?

162
00:06:36,540 --> 00:06:38,940
哦呵! 谨遵奉告 我们就在做着啊

163
00:06:39,110 --> 00:06:41,220
我们在测试电子游戏对青少年大脑的影响

164
00:06:41,930 --> 00:06:43,980
首先 我们玩上36个小时的"公路狂飙"...

165
00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:45,130
然后再连看10个小时的"闯关大赢家"

166
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看看我们还能记得多少

167
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我们甚至还写了实验日志

168
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你们的老师同意这个实验?

169
00:06:51,540 --> 00:06:53,310
哦 是呀 老师完全同意

170
00:06:53,440 --> 00:06:56,600
其他些同学在研究音乐对昏迷病人的影响

171
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衰人!

172
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嘿 教授 你的日志那有颗豆子

173
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我来开门!

174
00:07:05,880 --> 00:07:07,200
哦 你好 Sean

175
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,640
嗨 Carly 你在这儿做什么?

176
00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:13,760
我之前没想告诉其他人

177
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是因为我以为这只是单相思

178
00:07:15,930 --> 00:07:19,540
但他在所谓回家的路上
载我去做临时保姆

179
00:07:19,750 --> 00:07:21,930
那不是他回家的路

180
00:07:22,690 --> 00:07:25,600
他住在街角那里
而我要去沙滩大道那边

181
00:07:25,830 --> 00:07:28,330
那样要多等两个信号灯

182
00:07:28,570 --> 00:07:31,740
记不记得那次你被消防栓绊倒 他说

183
00:07:32,620 --> 00:07:33,870
"你留了这么多血

184
00:07:34,060 --> 00:07:35,440
要不要我把你妈妈找来?"

185
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,910
你真的觉得他喜欢我?

186
00:07:39,080 --> 00:07:40,870
只有一个办法才能确定

187
00:07:42,990 --> 00:07:45,420
我们应该拿些曲奇

188
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是呀

189
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小心小心

190
00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:51,890
还有那些弹子糖

191
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好的 淡定

192
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嗨

193
00:08:03,180 --> 00:08:04,540
嗨

194
00:08:05,700 --> 00:08:07,050
拿零食?

195
00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:09,670
哦 是呀 注意 看那

196
00:08:09,810 --> 00:08:12,740
"拿零食?" 他绝对对你有意思

197
00:08:13,500 --> 00:08:15,780
但是他一开始居然忽视我

198
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:17,480
那意味着什么?

199
00:08:17,630 --> 00:08:19,340
我的父母一直无视对方的

200
00:08:19,510 --> 00:08:20,840
哦 天哪!

201
00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:23,050
你们绝对要结婚的!

202
00:08:27,720 --> 00:08:29,830
我开始感觉好点儿了

203
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,210
Bob是对的

204
00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:35,550
啤酒 糖霜 哪个老人能消化这些啊

205
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嗨 妈妈

206
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我刚才头发湿着就出去转了一圈

207
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还在午饭时候吞了个西瓜籽

208
00:08:41,900 --> 00:08:43,900
肺炎? 没有

209
00:08:44,070 --> 00:08:46,960
西瓜籽在我肚子里发芽了? 没有

210
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:51,050
事情越扯越大了 是吗?

211
00:08:51,350 --> 00:08:53,390
越扯越大了

212
00:08:55,370 --> 00:08:57,350
是的 但肺炎那事是真的!

213
00:08:57,500 --> 00:08:59,050
你只是运气好

214
00:09:01,850 --> 00:09:04,650
嘿 我的奥普拉秀在哪儿?

215
00:09:05,250 --> 00:09:07,510
Axl 你把电视怎么了?

216
00:09:14,890 --> 00:09:18,220
啊 拜托了

217
00:09:19,180 --> 00:09:21,980
嘿 刚做完体检回来 你猜怎么了?

218
00:09:22,140 --> 00:09:24,220
骨头没问题 没有尿不尽 什么都没有

219
00:09:24,390 --> 00:09:26,080
绝对健康

220
00:09:28,140 --> 00:09:29,820
太好了

221
00:09:29,980 --> 00:09:32,580
先是成人尿布 现在为了插插头

222
00:09:32,740 --> 00:09:34,200
还把背扭到了

223
00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:36,480
再多糖霜

224
00:09:36,660 --> 00:09:38,690
也救不了我了

225
00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:46,110
好几天了 我的背还是没好

226
00:09:46,260 --> 00:09:47,950
我还是没告诉Mike

227
00:09:48,110 --> 00:09:50,560
我也不知道为什么 好吧 我知道

228
00:09:50,700 --> 00:09:52,110
男人从不去看医生

229
00:09:52,250 --> 00:09:53,500
身体却好得很

230
00:09:53,630 --> 00:09:55,430
我很抱歉 但这真的很过分

231
00:09:55,780 --> 00:09:57,680
插插头受的伤

232
00:09:57,830 --> 00:09:59,150
我现在成这样了?

233
00:09:59,310 --> 00:10:01,260
都没法插插头了?

234
00:10:01,440 --> 00:10:04,040
然后他把我带到了成人尿布那里

235
00:10:04,180 --> 00:10:05,940
我是说 拜托 看看我

236
00:10:06,110 --> 00:10:09,070
我能生小孩 我现在就能怀孕

237
00:10:11,300 --> 00:10:12,750
哦 左转

238
00:10:16,900 --> 00:10:18,570
妈 猜猜看?

239
00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:20,870
今天我坐陌生人的车回家了

240
00:10:21,060 --> 00:10:22,600
完好无缺

241
00:10:22,790 --> 00:10:24,890
Brick 过来 我们得谈谈

242
00:10:25,100 --> 00:10:26,300
Brick!

243
00:10:27,270 --> 00:10:30,550
过来! 过来!

244
00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:36,310
每个人都需要一个

245
00:10:36,470 --> 00:10:38,920
能阻止你犯大错的朋友

246
00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:41,270
Carly不是那样的朋友

247
00:10:41,430 --> 00:10:43,580
Sean一定会爱这首诗的

248
00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:45,730
简直是史上最浪漫的情诗

249
00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:47,120
真的?

250
00:10:47,250 --> 00:10:48,730
你有没有发现我用了三种不同的墨水

251
00:10:48,870 --> 00:10:50,500
来表达我三种不同的心情?

252
00:10:51,270 --> 00:10:52,150
我上个月写的

253
00:10:52,280 --> 00:10:53,400
但是太紧张了 没有给他

254
00:10:53,550 --> 00:10:54,540
你在开玩笑吗?

255
00:10:54,720 --> 00:10:59,120
"牙套上闪耀的情感使我迷眩"

256
00:10:59,300 --> 00:11:00,440
他绝对会喜欢的

257
00:11:00,610 --> 00:11:02,420
我不知道 这太疯狂了吗?

258
00:11:02,570 --> 00:11:04,420
我们生活在女权时代

259
00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:06,090
你说得对

260
00:11:07,640 --> 00:11:10,060
我是一个生活在二十一世纪的现代女性

261
00:11:10,210 --> 00:11:11,730
我要把这个给他

262
00:11:13,090 --> 00:11:15,470
上帝啊 我就要把这个给他了

263
00:11:16,290 --> 00:11:19,000
我拿到装弯刀柜子的钥匙了

264
00:11:19,150 --> 00:11:20,720
上帝啊 我爱作业

265
00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:25,750
Sean...

266
00:11:26,640 --> 00:11:29,910
我可以...

267
00:11:35,330 --> 00:11:36,510
你好

268
00:11:37,630 --> 00:11:40,140
我的天 是我的前男友

269
00:11:41,550 --> 00:11:43,770
Brad 你在这做什么?

270
00:11:43,970 --> 00:11:45,570
我的踢踏舞班就在街那头

271
00:11:45,720 --> 00:11:47,540
我就过来拿我的滤锅了

272
00:11:47,700 --> 00:11:48,860
我把它落在这了

273
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,010
就是让你家体验意大利
奇幻通心粉之旅的那次

274
00:11:51,150 --> 00:11:51,900
等等

275
00:11:52,770 --> 00:11:55,220
我的前任男友和我未来男友在同一间房里?

276
00:11:55,370 --> 00:11:57,530
这不妙 我该怎么办?

277
00:11:57,680 --> 00:11:59,250
我们得谨慎对待

278
00:11:59,410 --> 00:12:01,700
- 5
- 1 2 3 4 5

279
00:12:01,860 --> 00:12:03,790
- 蓝色
- B l u e

280
00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:04,650
3

281
00:12:07,540 --> 00:12:09,620
你好 Brad

282
00:12:09,790 --> 00:12:10,580
看看你...

283
00:12:10,740 --> 00:12:13,290
在我的门廊上跳踢踏舞 邻居都看得到

284
00:12:13,450 --> 00:12:14,230
你好 Heck先生

285
00:12:14,390 --> 00:12:16,790
我得在等Sue拿滤锅的同时保持腿部温度

286
00:12:17,380 --> 00:12:19,120
我完全不明白你在说什么

287
00:12:19,270 --> 00:12:20,640
不过你干嘛不进去等?

288
00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:21,760
好啊

289
00:12:22,240 --> 00:12:24,170
Sue Brad在客厅里

290
00:12:24,350 --> 00:12:25,660
好!

291
00:12:28,410 --> 00:12:29,440
你在干嘛?

292
00:12:29,580 --> 00:12:32,170
没什么 我只是在找一颗扣子

293
00:12:32,910 --> 00:12:34,020
在这里

294
00:12:34,510 --> 00:12:35,600
是一粒爆米花

295
00:12:35,790 --> 00:12:37,620
嘿 今天是我们的结婚纪念日

296
00:12:38,370 --> 00:12:39,940
什么? 真的?

297
00:12:40,100 --> 00:12:42,330
是的 我也忘了 不过Bob寄了贺卡来

298
00:12:42,510 --> 00:12:43,710
真是好人

299
00:12:43,870 --> 00:12:44,900
还很诡异

300
00:12:45,190 --> 00:12:46,600
不如你穿双高跟鞋

301
00:12:46,730 --> 00:12:48,020
让我带你出去吃顿好的?

302
00:12:48,780 --> 00:12:51,280
我不需要一顿花俏的晚餐

303
00:12:51,460 --> 00:12:55,400
我还在享受你去年送我的这个地毯呢

304
00:12:55,570 --> 00:12:56,680
但是我有优惠卷

305
00:12:56,830 --> 00:12:58,330
我甚至可以让你点你喜欢吃的

306
00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:00,410
我来选等价或更便宜的赠送的菜

307
00:13:00,560 --> 00:13:01,910
我们还是等下个月吧

308
00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:04,070
时候不早了 我一定要找到扣子

309
00:13:04,220 --> 00:13:05,430
来吧 这是我们的纪念日

310
00:13:05,570 --> 00:13:07,060
检查说我身体健康

311
00:13:07,230 --> 00:13:09,740
我们还可以早点回来吃甜点

312
00:13:11,580 --> 00:13:14,170
上帝啊 我希望他是在说冰淇凌

313
00:13:17,300 --> 00:13:19,600
Brad和Sean都还在外面呢

314
00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:22,090
天呐 我怎么把事情搞得一团糟?

315
00:13:22,610 --> 00:13:24,500
我希望他俩别为我打架

316
00:13:24,650 --> 00:13:27,070
Sean会把他打死的! 他可是打橄榄球的

317
00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:28,630
但是Brad也挺强悍的

318
00:13:28,790 --> 00:13:30,680
他有上舞蹈课

319
00:13:34,370 --> 00:13:36,740
我赶时间 所以就自己拿了

320
00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:39,440
但记得来看我的专场演出

321
00:13:39,580 --> 00:13:42,100
周末日场 周一夜场

322
00:13:42,260 --> 00:13:43,120
再见啦

323
00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:49,450
我的天啊 我感觉真不好

324
00:13:49,690 --> 00:13:51,570
他完全被压垮了

325
00:13:54,450 --> 00:13:57,300
我决定忍着 希望泡个热水澡

326
00:13:57,460 --> 00:14:00,200
可以舒缓我的伤势

327
00:14:00,270 --> 00:14:03,020
我知道我知道 我应该告诉他的

328
00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:04,510
不要评价我

329
00:14:04,590 --> 00:14:06,540
嘿 我在这里

330
00:14:06,690 --> 00:14:07,640
抱歉

331
00:14:09,180 --> 00:14:12,210
不 Brick 我是说去你自己的卫生间

332
00:14:12,830 --> 00:14:14,030
等等

333
00:14:14,170 --> 00:14:15,150
我的水有点凉

334
00:14:15,290 --> 00:14:16,710
帮我开一下热水开关吧

335
00:14:16,840 --> 00:14:17,810
你干嘛不自己动手?

336
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:19,730
是这样的...

337
00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:21,390
事情是这样的 Brick

338
00:14:21,550 --> 00:14:22,950
我把背闪了

339
00:14:23,110 --> 00:14:24,790
我当时在搬一个很重很重的东西

340
00:14:24,950 --> 00:14:26,190
但是你们总是说 我太小了

341
00:14:26,350 --> 00:14:28,080
不能自己一个人用热水

342
00:14:28,240 --> 00:14:30,470
你够大了 快点 转一下

343
00:14:35,020 --> 00:14:38,050
够了 关上吧

344
00:14:40,420 --> 00:14:42,550
不 嗷嗷嗷 另外一边

345
00:14:42,700 --> 00:14:43,220
哪边?

346
00:14:43,340 --> 00:14:45,200
- 右边
- 我的右边还是把手的右边?

347
00:14:45,360 --> 00:14:46,760
谁在乎把手的右边?

348
00:14:46,940 --> 00:14:50,860
你的右边! 嗷! 你要把我活生生煮熟了!

349
00:14:51,900 --> 00:14:54,270
我不能再这样做了

350
00:14:54,460 --> 00:14:56,000
Brad心碎了

351
00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:59,030
Sean又是出身名门

352
00:14:59,260 --> 00:15:01,520
我处理不了三角恋

353
00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:03,470
我又不是kardashian
(帕丽斯希尔顿好友 交际花)

354
00:15:03,810 --> 00:15:06,000
我们现在倒是需要她们的智慧

355
00:15:06,180 --> 00:15:09,300
最糟糕的是 这事蒙住了我的眼

356
00:15:09,540 --> 00:15:11,530
越野跑才是最重要的

357
00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:15,890
现在只有唯一一个办法

358
00:15:16,190 --> 00:15:18,620
我要告诉Sean这行不通

359
00:15:20,390 --> 00:15:21,830
- 右边是关 左边是开!
- 它关不上!

360
00:15:22,010 --> 00:15:24,750
- 我不知道我在干什么 我还要尿尿呢!
- 不是的! 往右边扭 Brick! 啊!

361
00:15:24,980 --> 00:15:27,100
不要吼我了!

362
00:15:32,170 --> 00:15:35,640
我不知道你们每天是怎么做到的

363
00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:37,180
嘿 Brick

364
00:15:37,330 --> 00:15:40,610
我们没必要和你爸提这件事

365
00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:42,370
什么 我明显没准备好

366
00:15:42,490 --> 00:15:44,000
你就让我用热水这事?

367
00:15:44,140 --> 00:15:46,510
不 我是说 他不需要知道我的背闪了

368
00:15:46,670 --> 00:15:48,380
又说谎话 妈?

369
00:15:48,590 --> 00:15:50,080
你什么时候才会消停?

370
00:15:50,260 --> 00:15:52,550
你要我不说谎 结果你转身就说

371
00:15:52,730 --> 00:15:54,460
好吧 Brick 是这样的

372
00:15:54,940 --> 00:15:58,560
说谎绝对是不好的

373
00:15:58,810 --> 00:16:01,110
只是有时

374
00:16:01,280 --> 00:16:03,510
说谎能保护你在乎的人

375
00:16:03,670 --> 00:16:05,190
比如说 有人剪了个糟糕的发型

376
00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:07,250
你还是说 "发型真好"

377
00:16:07,420 --> 00:16:09,040
你要是不想我买糖

378
00:16:09,190 --> 00:16:10,680
为什么不直接说不呢?

379
00:16:10,840 --> 00:16:12,690
为什么不? 为什么不? 为什么不?

380
00:16:12,870 --> 00:16:14,740
为什么不? 为什么不?

381
00:16:15,870 --> 00:16:20,120
只是有时候 撒点小谎会让生活简单一些

382
00:16:20,300 --> 00:16:21,450
懂了吗?

383
00:16:22,080 --> 00:16:24,350
喔 你怎么还没准备好? 发生了什么?

384
00:16:24,540 --> 00:16:26,480
地上怎么都是水?

385
00:16:29,340 --> 00:16:31,070
我在阳台下面发现了一只蜘蛛

386
00:16:31,220 --> 00:16:33,010
是一个络新妇

387
00:16:33,180 --> 00:16:34,380
我就把它带过来给妈妈看

388
00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:36,100
但是不小心把它掉进浴缸了

389
00:16:36,250 --> 00:16:37,050
妈妈就抽风了

390
00:16:37,210 --> 00:16:38,660
我试着在蜘蛛淹死之前把它弄出来

391
00:16:38,780 --> 00:16:40,140
但是太晚了 我就把它冲走了

392
00:16:40,270 --> 00:16:42,850
所以你想看也看不到了 因为它没了

393
00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:45,020
发型不错

394
00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:48,030
我不知道是应该感动还是惊悚

395
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:51,340
我儿子为我说了谎 我没事了

396
00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:53,030
我只是忘了一件小事

397
00:16:53,210 --> 00:16:55,110
- Brick非得说出来不可
- 我在说谎

398
00:16:59,790 --> 00:17:02,430
电子游戏成了作业 就没以前好玩了

399
00:17:02,580 --> 00:17:05,300
是啊 我要吃东西 我头晕了

400
00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:08,400
我们去买外卖吧

401
00:17:08,550 --> 00:17:11,640
我要一个汉堡还有... 那个

402
00:17:11,830 --> 00:17:14,300
- 薯条
- 不是 不过也要买薯条

403
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:16,550
- 我得把这写下来
- 是啊

404
00:17:17,850 --> 00:17:20,650
嘿 我们要出去买吃的 要一起来吗?

405
00:17:21,530 --> 00:17:24,580
我想去 Sean 我真的想去

406
00:17:24,750 --> 00:17:27,130
但现在我的生活太复杂了

407
00:17:27,290 --> 00:17:30,010
我觉得我应该把心思放在越野跑上

408
00:17:30,200 --> 00:17:32,330
我希望你能理解

409
00:17:32,700 --> 00:17:35,140
是时机不对

410
00:17:36,280 --> 00:17:38,290
不总是这样吗?

411
00:17:38,610 --> 00:17:42,010
所以...我想说的是

412
00:17:42,310 --> 00:17:46,210
我很抱歉 Sean 但是我不能和你一起去

413
00:17:46,370 --> 00:17:49,220
我们会给你带鸡块回来的

414
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:58,410
这是我做过的最艰难的事

415
00:17:58,970 --> 00:18:01,630
我会试着去看"暮光之城: 月食"
不去想这个

416
00:18:01,790 --> 00:18:03,700
但是我想不会有用的

417
00:18:08,460 --> 00:18:10,130
嘿 这是什么?

418
00:18:10,370 --> 00:18:12,010
一首诗什么的

419
00:18:12,490 --> 00:18:15,720
"感情之强烈 无可指责"

420
00:18:16,150 --> 00:18:20,210
"就像蝴蝶与鸽子 乘着爱情的彩虹"

421
00:18:20,360 --> 00:18:21,930
每个人都需要一个

422
00:18:22,070 --> 00:18:23,960
会阻止你犯下巨大错误的朋友

423
00:18:24,140 --> 00:18:26,000
Carly不是那个朋友

424
00:18:26,360 --> 00:18:27,610
但Axl是

425
00:18:27,770 --> 00:18:29,580
那是我的 只是

426
00:18:29,850 --> 00:18:33,290
瞎写一些歌词 你懂

427
00:18:33,700 --> 00:18:35,370
Axl帮Sue补救?

428
00:18:35,570 --> 00:18:37,490
我猜电子游戏真的腐蚀了他的大脑

429
00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:39,900
你把i上面的点画成爱心?

430
00:18:40,700 --> 00:18:42,350
那些是屁股

431
00:18:48,530 --> 00:18:51,760
你半个小时前就说会换好衣服
怎么这么慢?

432
00:18:53,410 --> 00:18:55,220
我出不去

433
00:18:55,470 --> 00:18:57,780
我插插座时把背给闪了

434
00:18:57,920 --> 00:18:58,870
我不想告诉你

435
00:18:59,030 --> 00:19:01,200
因为我不想让你觉得我又老又可怜

436
00:19:01,360 --> 00:19:03,960
看看我 我连浴缸都出不了

437
00:19:04,470 --> 00:19:06,820
我试过了 把整个帘子都扯了下来

438
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:09,230
你又在浴缸里喝酒了?

439
00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:13,810
Mike 有人觉得我需要尿布

440
00:19:14,150 --> 00:19:15,730
你相信吗?

441
00:19:15,910 --> 00:19:18,700
我一直以为我们会一起慢慢变老

442
00:19:19,110 --> 00:19:21,370
结果我比你老得快多了!

443
00:19:21,830 --> 00:19:23,960
我不管Oz医生怎么说

444
00:19:24,160 --> 00:19:27,180
在婚姻中 女性才是承受所有压力的人

445
00:19:27,370 --> 00:19:29,390
去问问Oz医生的夫人就知道了!

446
00:19:29,570 --> 00:19:32,490
你知道全家的日程表吗?

447
00:19:32,870 --> 00:19:36,550
Sue三点到五点有越野跑

448
00:19:36,890 --> 00:19:40,980
Brick每个星期六11点
都要去流动图书馆

449
00:19:41,210 --> 00:19:43,510
这让我疲惫不堪 Mike!

450
00:19:43,770 --> 00:19:46,890
我连我们的纪念日都没记住

451
00:19:47,860 --> 00:19:51,710
先是背 再是大脑
最后是膀胱 我就这么老了

452
00:19:51,990 --> 00:19:53,260
好吧

453
00:19:54,110 --> 00:19:55,690
抓着

454
00:20:01,900 --> 00:20:04,400
去找个新老婆吧

455
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:06,390
幸福点 不要为我担心

456
00:20:06,550 --> 00:20:09,550
我就呆在这 提前衰老

457
00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:12,370
不过帮我个忙 走之前把所有插头都插好

458
00:20:12,540 --> 00:20:13,620
闭嘴 Frankie

459
00:20:13,780 --> 00:20:15,900
看 看我的脚!

460
00:20:15,900 --> 00:20:18,210
我的脚像九十岁老太婆的!

461
00:20:18,390 --> 00:20:20,770
你只是泡水起皱而已 你没衰老

462
00:20:20,910 --> 00:20:22,310
是啊 你这个健康无比

463
00:20:22,440 --> 00:20:25,160
像个正值盛年的消防员
那样抱着我的人当然这么说了!

464
00:20:25,340 --> 00:20:27,150
我没有健康无比

465
00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:30,320
你有 你自己说的

466
00:20:30,510 --> 00:20:31,770
不

467
00:20:32,560 --> 00:20:34,480
我胆固醇高了

468
00:20:34,650 --> 00:20:35,990
我不想告诉你

469
00:20:36,620 --> 00:20:38,200
高了一点还是高了很多?

470
00:20:38,360 --> 00:20:39,570
- 很多
- 真的?

471
00:20:39,750 --> 00:20:41,070
我们俩都在衰老?

472
00:20:41,220 --> 00:20:43,230
是啊 结婚纪念日快乐

473
00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:45,770
我要是动的了 我一定会亲你

474
00:20:49,580 --> 00:20:51,370
我爱你

475
00:20:52,180 --> 00:20:54,760
现在把电热毯和遥控器给我

476
00:20:54,940 --> 00:20:57,310
然后一个月都不要碰我

477
00:20:58,420 --> 00:21:01,950
这实际上是我们最好的纪念日了

478
00:21:02,150 --> 00:21:04,040
我们躺在床上 吃着披萨饼

479
00:21:04,190 --> 00:21:05,800
看着"当哈利遇见萨利"

483
00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:13,110
裹着电热毯几天后

484
00:21:13,300 --> 00:21:14,610
妈 你感觉好点了吗

485
00:21:14,790 --> 00:21:16,340
你介意起床吗?

486
00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:18,150
我觉得我还要再躺一天

487
00:21:18,300 --> 00:21:20,060
我的背还是挺疼的

488
00:21:22,290 --> 00:21:24,260
我在说谎

480
00:21:05,980 --> 00:21:07,980
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481
00:21:08,410 --> 00:21:09,980
<font color=#38B0DE>-=YTET-伊甸园字幕组=-
翻译: 十二方 郁闷ing
校对: 黄沙舞风 时间轴: YTET-Vicky8800
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482
00:21:24,570 --> 00:21:29,680
<font color=#38B0DE>左右不逢缘
第二季 第三集</font>

