1
00:00:02,110 --> 00:00:04,220
给你的

2
00:00:04,220 --> 00:00:05,250
你的

3
00:00:05,290 --> 00:00:07,520
还有你的

4
00:00:07,520 --> 00:00:08,450
这是什么

5
00:00:08,450 --> 00:00:12,590
女士 这是STD(性病/请帖)

6
00:00:12,600 --> 00:00:13,980
你在说什么呢 伙计

7
00:00:13,980 --> 00:00:17,360
STD 请帖啊 我和Vivian的结婚请帖

8
00:00:17,370 --> 00:00:19,200
啊 这样

9
00:00:19,230 --> 00:00:22,240
嘿 好奇问一句 你给了多少人STD

10
00:00:22,270 --> 00:00:24,100
超多 大概100个吧

11
00:00:25,710 --> 00:00:26,940
怎么了

12
00:00:26,940 --> 00:00:30,380
呃 哦 我懂了 "STD"另有深意

13
00:00:30,410 --> 00:00:31,880
你们太下流了

14
00:00:31,910 --> 00:00:33,580
其他人不会想歪的

15
00:00:33,580 --> 00:00:35,350
所有人都会想歪

16
00:00:35,350 --> 00:00:36,980
但是你没想歪真是可爱

17
00:00:36,980 --> 00:00:38,780
谢谢 是很可爱

18
00:00:38,790 --> 00:00:41,190
你的第一支舞会是吗

19
00:00:41,220 --> 00:00:42,860
宴会上会有螃蟹(阴虱)吗

20
00:00:42,860 --> 00:00:43,960
你有疱疹吗

21
00:00:43,960 --> 00:00:46,760
同志们 这是我的婚礼 人生大事

22
00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:47,690
不准再调侃了

23
00:00:47,690 --> 00:00:49,600
说得对 抱歉了

24
00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:51,860
我们都爱你 伙计 毫无保留(尖锐湿疣)

25
00:00:51,900 --> 00:00:53,510
抱歉 我做了个鲁莽(皮疹)的决定

26
00:00:53,510 --> 00:00:56,600
不说"瘙痒"得慌 好了 不开玩笑了

27
00:00:56,600 --> 00:01:00,110
我有STD

28
00:01:00,140 --> 00:01:01,770
所以直接回复就行 还是

29
00:01:01,810 --> 00:01:03,660
对 电话上面有

30
00:01:03,660 --> 00:01:04,000
好嘞

31
00:01:04,050 --> 00:01:05,510
神烦警探 
第一季 第十九集

32
00:01:25,430 --> 00:01:27,060
基地训练日好

33
00:01:27,100 --> 00:01:28,890
基地训练日妙

34
00:01:28,890 --> 00:01:31,270
基地训练日呱呱叫

35
00:01:31,270 --> 00:01:33,730
Peralta 你对警部的强制训练如此兴奋

36
00:01:33,730 --> 00:01:35,180
真让我惊讶

37
00:01:35,180 --> 00:01:36,840
这是一年中最有趣的一天了

38
00:01:36,840 --> 00:01:38,140
你不会懂的

39
00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:40,210
因为你没有感受快乐的程序指令

40
00:01:40,210 --> 00:01:43,110
确实 但是情感升级后 我的软件有这个功能了

41
00:01:43,150 --> 00:01:44,850
你在机器人笑话里面插一脚

42
00:01:44,850 --> 00:01:46,550
简直让其中的乐趣全无

43
00:01:46,550 --> 00:01:47,570
我故意的

44
00:01:47,570 --> 00:01:50,620
总之 基地训练日棒极了

45
00:01:50,620 --> 00:01:52,890
我们能实地尝试一大堆炫酷新武器

46
00:01:52,920 --> 00:01:54,810
而且训练场景也总是新的

47
00:01:54,810 --> 00:01:56,190
去年是越狱

48
00:01:56,190 --> 00:01:58,730
超级暴力

49
00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:01,450
罪犯

50
00:02:02,670 --> 00:02:04,550
就像身处动作电影之中

51
00:02:04,550 --> 00:02:08,500
这还是一个让我们尽情释放 团结一致的好机会

52
00:02:08,500 --> 00:02:09,800
每个人都很享受

53
00:02:27,850 --> 00:02:30,610
更不用说 99片区从来没有个完美的表现

54
00:02:30,610 --> 00:02:34,160
确实 但是Jake连续两年入围最酷击杀奖

55
00:02:34,190 --> 00:02:37,910
那可是所有警员 从每个辖区提交的短片中票选出来的

56
00:02:37,910 --> 00:02:39,200
没什么大不了的啦

57
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:42,640
奖品就是一个儿童空手道奖杯 所以

58
00:02:42,670 --> 00:02:44,520
其实你极度想赢 是吧

59
00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:46,900
想到死 为了那个奖杯我佛挡杀佛

60
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:49,940
必要的话 我会把你们挨个爆头

61
00:02:49,940 --> 00:02:51,580
团队万岁

62
00:02:52,810 --> 00:02:55,950
Gina 地检跟你要Adams案审讯记录的复印件

63
00:02:56,990 --> 00:02:57,980
Gina

64
00:02:58,420 --> 00:02:59,180
Gina

65
00:03:05,290 --> 00:03:06,620
Gina

66
00:03:06,660 --> 00:03:09,090
不好意思 我在玩轰狂蛋糕

67
00:03:09,090 --> 00:03:10,410
疯狂蛋糕

68
00:03:10,410 --> 00:03:13,060
轰狂 底下"双"反过来写的轰

69
00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:15,190
没有反向的"双"这玩意儿

70
00:03:15,190 --> 00:03:17,760
真有的 看好了

71
00:03:17,760 --> 00:03:22,310
游戏这样玩 只要把三个同色糖霜的小蛋糕连成一线

72
00:03:22,310 --> 00:03:23,440
咔嘣

73
00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:26,400
对你而言 这个小游戏比工作更有趣吗

74
00:03:26,410 --> 00:03:30,250
是啊 轰狂蛋糕比工作有趣多了

75
00:03:30,250 --> 00:03:31,910
别再说"轰狂"了

76
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:34,820
也别再玩无聊的垃圾游戏了 不嫌丢人

77
00:03:34,850 --> 00:03:36,380
有话当面说

78
00:03:36,380 --> 00:03:37,920
我是当面说的 是你盯着手机不放

79
00:03:37,950 --> 00:03:40,120
这样啊 怪我

80
00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:43,760
好消息 我想好今年在训练基地扮演的角色了

81
00:03:43,830 --> 00:03:46,430
隆重介绍 Rex Buckingham

82
00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:49,500
英国间谍 军火专家

83
00:03:49,530 --> 00:03:51,500
还是师奶杀手

84
00:03:51,530 --> 00:03:55,500
是啊 什么女人会不喜欢超级会装的男人呢

85
00:03:55,500 --> 00:03:57,550
整个模拟训练就是装

86
00:03:57,550 --> 00:04:00,320
我们向假的坏人身上打彩蛋 这就是表演

87
00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:01,960
说说我和乔治克鲁尼有什么不同

88
00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:02,880
他的声音性感

89
00:04:02,910 --> 00:04:04,340
我的声音也性感

90
00:04:04,350 --> 00:04:07,980
香槟 山脉 拥抱

91
00:04:08,020 --> 00:04:09,240
山脉

92
00:04:09,240 --> 00:04:10,840
我想不出什么性感的词了

93
00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:14,370
啥 山脉哎 那可是最性感的地质特征了

94
00:04:14,370 --> 00:04:16,910
不对 等等 抱歉 应该是深海"沟"

95
00:04:18,310 --> 00:04:20,040
我还是和Rosa聊天去吧

96
00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,120
你努力想想更性感的词吧

97
00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:25,210
耶稣会信徒 园艺学

98
00:04:25,210 --> 00:04:27,100
羊咩咩

99
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:29,850
你们两个什么情况

100
00:04:29,850 --> 00:04:31,140
拜托 Boyle 别再提这个了

101
00:04:31,170 --> 00:04:32,670
你得承认你们之间有火花

102
00:04:32,710 --> 00:04:34,620
我得重复多少遍啊 她像是我的妹妹

103
00:04:34,620 --> 00:04:36,270
卢克也这么说莉亚的

104
00:04:36,310 --> 00:04:39,180
嘿 卢克不知道 没人知道

105
00:04:41,050 --> 00:04:43,580
好的 Stella 好的 没问题

106
00:04:43,580 --> 00:04:45,380
好的 拜

107
00:04:45,380 --> 00:04:46,850
该死

108
00:04:46,850 --> 00:04:48,920
Boyle婚礼那晚我们家保姆有事

109
00:04:48,950 --> 00:04:51,150
她要去参加学校的才艺比赛

110
00:04:51,150 --> 00:04:52,160
她输定了

111
00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:55,020
除非比赛项目是"在Terry家的沙发上掉满薯片渣"

112
00:04:55,030 --> 00:04:56,950
等等 Boyle的大喜日子定了

113
00:04:56,950 --> 00:04:59,000
是的 他昨天发请帖了

114
00:04:59,890 --> 00:05:00,800
他没给你吗

115
00:05:01,700 --> 00:05:03,470
我觉得他在躲着我

116
00:05:04,840 --> 00:05:05,860
嘿

117
00:05:06,740 --> 00:05:08,900
哦 我恨披萨

118
00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:10,470
他没邀请我去他的婚礼

119
00:05:10,470 --> 00:05:12,170
所以怕得像个小婊子一样

120
00:05:12,210 --> 00:05:14,680
或许因为你出席Vivian会不舒服

121
00:05:14,710 --> 00:05:17,370
毕竟 Boyle几周之前还喜欢你呢

122
00:05:18,370 --> 00:05:20,540
别生气啊

123
00:05:20,540 --> 00:05:22,990
我没生气 我觉得很有趣呢

124
00:05:30,610 --> 00:05:34,410
热腾腾的无聊文件来啦

125
00:05:34,410 --> 00:05:36,230
谢谢 Gina 出去吧

126
00:05:36,230 --> 00:05:37,460
你可以出去了

127
00:05:37,950 --> 00:05:39,070
你在这儿干啥呢

128
00:05:39,900 --> 00:05:40,870
没干啥

129
00:05:40,900 --> 00:05:42,770
好的 我能看一下你的手机吗

130
00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:44,940
我大概是在玩

131
00:05:44,940 --> 00:05:46,540
疯狂蛋糕

132
00:05:46,950 --> 00:05:50,820
警监 你不是早该放下面子说"轰"了吗

133
00:05:50,820 --> 00:05:52,040
好吧

134
00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:55,720
我可能是在玩

135
00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:56,920
轰狂蛋糕

136
00:05:56,920 --> 00:05:58,390
太让人上瘾了 对吧

137
00:05:58,390 --> 00:06:02,900
我玩得太多了 现在晚上一闭眼 只能看见蛋糕

138
00:06:02,900 --> 00:06:05,690
而不是以往那一道道炫目的闪光

139
00:06:05,730 --> 00:06:08,960
我的自制力非常强

140
00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:12,660
抵抗这个傻游戏完全没问题

141
00:06:12,700 --> 00:06:16,670
实际上 我已经把这个应用删掉了

142
00:06:16,700 --> 00:06:19,000
好了

143
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:21,320
那我的进度是不是都没了

144
00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:25,010
算了 反正我不玩了

145
00:06:26,370 --> 00:06:28,920
99片区来也

146
00:06:28,920 --> 00:06:29,680
99片区

147
00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,410
嗨 Ronnie

148
00:06:31,410 --> 00:06:33,350
你从旁观升级为罪犯了啊

149
00:06:33,350 --> 00:06:34,710
- 太棒了  - 谢谢

150
00:06:34,710 --> 00:06:36,220
我要打爆你的头

151
00:06:38,190 --> 00:06:39,510
Amy Santiago

152
00:06:39,510 --> 00:06:40,190
Teddy

153
00:06:40,220 --> 00:06:42,230
- 嘿  - 天啊

154
00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:45,050
好久不见 你在这儿干嘛呢

155
00:06:45,050 --> 00:06:47,110
我现在在82片区 这次和你们一起训练

156
00:06:47,110 --> 00:06:49,830
快速问答 10-54L

157
00:06:50,390 --> 00:06:52,870
救护车案 断肢

158
00:06:54,270 --> 00:06:56,090
这是在干啥呢

159
00:06:56,090 --> 00:06:57,370
Teddy和我在一个密码训练营认识的

160
00:06:57,370 --> 00:07:00,160
是一个自愿的警用密码进修课程

161
00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:02,780
那些辛苦背书的漫漫长夜啊

162
00:07:02,780 --> 00:07:04,510
超棒的

163
00:07:04,550 --> 00:07:05,680
听着挺棒

164
00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:07,920
- 幸会  - 幸会

165
00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:10,910
- 我先去签到 等下接着聊吧  - 好啊

166
00:07:10,910 --> 00:07:12,630
- 见到你太好了 - 我也是

167
00:07:13,790 --> 00:07:15,520
那是谁啊

168
00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:18,830
Teddy 我们去年约过五次会

169
00:07:18,860 --> 00:07:20,910
我挺喜欢他的 但是他去了皇后区

170
00:07:20,910 --> 00:07:23,480
我就没能再见到他 接着就掰了

171
00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:25,130
哦 就那个你说有一堆蹩脚特点的家伙

172
00:07:25,170 --> 00:07:26,470
什么"他很善于倾听"

173
00:07:26,500 --> 00:07:28,640
请问你觉得男人怎么样才算好

174
00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:30,120
说不好 有料吧

175
00:07:30,460 --> 00:07:32,230
美臀

176
00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:34,690
好吧

177
00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:37,610
Amy居然和那人约过会

178
00:07:37,650 --> 00:07:39,580
你干嘛这么在乎

179
00:07:39,580 --> 00:07:43,700
第一 你暗示性的嗓音太尖了 很诡异

180
00:07:43,700 --> 00:07:44,950
第二 我才不在乎

181
00:07:44,990 --> 00:07:47,120
我只是好奇她怎么会喜欢他

182
00:07:47,150 --> 00:07:48,350
你爱咋说咋说吧

183
00:07:48,390 --> 00:07:49,820
哦好吧 我也发现了

184
00:07:49,820 --> 00:07:52,260
我听着就和里的梅丽尔斯特里普一样

185
00:07:56,200 --> 00:07:59,770
好酷啊 可以在转角处开枪耶

186
00:07:59,770 --> 00:08:02,010
我好喜欢枪 我一定会成为一个超棒的爸爸

187
00:08:02,010 --> 00:08:03,670
绝无半点可能"性"

188
00:08:03,710 --> 00:08:06,440
Amy Santiago深有体会

189
00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:08,640
Santiago 试试这个

190
00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:09,560
10-51

191
00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:12,650
流窜团伙 说明流窜方向及团伙人数

192
00:08:12,650 --> 00:08:14,680
至少来个能让我费点劲儿的吧

193
00:08:14,680 --> 00:08:16,940
我来出一个 10-69(相互口交体位)怎么样

194
00:08:16,940 --> 00:08:18,130
简单 消息收到

195
00:08:18,130 --> 00:08:21,230
消息也"射出" 我说的对不 击掌

196
00:08:21,970 --> 00:08:23,040
69哟

197
00:08:23,040 --> 00:08:24,150
我懂

198
00:08:24,150 --> 00:08:26,510
有新手枪呢 想去看看吗

199
00:08:26,510 --> 00:08:28,050
- 好啊  - 当然想

200
00:08:28,740 --> 00:08:30,300
噢 我懂了

201
00:08:30,330 --> 00:08:31,960
我还以为他在跟我说呢

202
00:08:31,970 --> 00:08:34,730
他明显就是嘛 快点 Ted 咱走着

203
00:08:34,770 --> 00:08:35,870
这儿你看着哦

204
00:08:38,160 --> 00:08:40,060
这是PUW

205
00:08:40,060 --> 00:08:42,040
手提式超声波武器

206
00:08:42,040 --> 00:08:46,930
它发出的集中声波可以扰乱罪犯 甚至使其失去行动能力

207
00:08:46,930 --> 00:08:48,620
- 这玩意儿发射声波   - 没错

208
00:08:48,620 --> 00:08:49,610
这是扳机吗

209
00:08:49,610 --> 00:08:51,250
是的 但你得小心点

210
00:08:52,450 --> 00:08:54,210
啊啊

211
00:08:54,210 --> 00:08:55,140
还以为会再大声点呢

212
00:08:55,140 --> 00:08:56,590
这是精准定向的

213
00:08:56,590 --> 00:08:58,930
如果对着你的话 你现在肯定疼得要死

214
00:09:02,930 --> 00:09:05,490
为什么会这样

215
00:09:05,490 --> 00:09:07,730
我能尝到我的思想

216
00:09:07,730 --> 00:09:09,100
够了 Diaz

217
00:09:09,130 --> 00:09:11,730
天啊

218
00:09:11,730 --> 00:09:14,440
真酷

219
00:09:17,810 --> 00:09:19,640
Holt警监

220
00:09:19,680 --> 00:09:21,410
你看到Holt警监了吗

221
00:09:21,410 --> 00:09:24,910
高大帅气的绅士 穿得像飞行员一样

222
00:09:24,920 --> 00:09:28,280
- 没有  - 好吧

223
00:09:32,990 --> 00:09:34,860
你裤子是穿好的 我直接进来咯

224
00:09:35,890 --> 00:09:37,730
警监

225
00:09:37,730 --> 00:09:40,590
你可能有点小问题了啊

226
00:09:41,310 --> 00:09:42,830
在我掌控之中

227
00:09:42,830 --> 00:09:44,800
你该走了 这是男洗手间

228
00:09:44,800 --> 00:09:49,900
已经不是男洗手间了 这儿现在是骗子的巢窟

229
00:09:49,900 --> 00:09:52,860
我是这个片区的警监 你是我的助理

230
00:09:52,860 --> 00:09:54,840
我已经直接命令你出去了

231
00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:56,590
我没有任何问题

232
00:09:56,590 --> 00:09:58,070
如果我想玩轰狂蛋糕

233
00:09:58,070 --> 00:10:00,610
那我就要玩轰狂蛋糕

234
00:10:02,590 --> 00:10:04,850
生起气来"轰狂"不容易说利索

235
00:10:04,850 --> 00:10:07,860
不过我的想法已经说得很清楚了

236
00:10:10,620 --> 00:10:11,760
不错啊

237
00:10:11,760 --> 00:10:13,590
注意到了吗 他们改了扳机的位置

238
00:10:13,630 --> 00:10:14,990
指触很让人兴奋呢

239
00:10:14,990 --> 00:10:17,130
"指触" 逗吧

240
00:10:18,300 --> 00:10:20,430
厉害 两枪都打在胸边上

241
00:10:20,470 --> 00:10:21,630
教科书级的射击

242
00:10:21,630 --> 00:10:23,420
是啊 他的背带裤就被射掉了

243
00:10:23,420 --> 00:10:25,170
真不敢相信 你居然杀农民伯伯

244
00:10:25,170 --> 00:10:27,020
他们可是我国经济的支柱啊

245
00:10:27,740 --> 00:10:28,680
请让我来

246
00:10:28,770 --> 00:10:29,970
说到射击习惯

247
00:10:29,980 --> 00:10:32,980
我喜欢"鸡头巴" 鸡鸡 头部 下巴

248
00:10:35,090 --> 00:10:35,610
枪法不错

249
00:10:35,610 --> 00:10:37,780
但你觉得以鸡鸡为目标有效果吗

250
00:10:37,780 --> 00:10:40,620
小常识 就算生殖器被打掉了 人还能跑个半英里哦

251
00:10:40,620 --> 00:10:42,410
知道得这么清楚不觉得诡异吗

252
00:10:44,820 --> 00:10:48,390
嘿嘿 我知道你因为Boyle很火大

253
00:10:48,820 --> 00:10:52,120
我跟你说了 用声波炮打他是个意外

254
00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:53,660
不只这件事

255
00:10:59,010 --> 00:11:01,000
啊噢 抱歉 网枪

256
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:03,310
我的欧蕾咖啡

257
00:11:04,470 --> 00:11:06,640
抱歉 刚才哑火了

258
00:11:08,640 --> 00:11:10,880
正中两点

259
00:11:10,880 --> 00:11:12,350
好多意外啊

260
00:11:12,380 --> 00:11:14,880
如果Vivian不想我去 我理解

261
00:11:14,880 --> 00:11:16,220
但Boyle好歹说点什么吧

262
00:11:16,220 --> 00:11:17,700
我们是朋友啊

263
00:11:17,700 --> 00:11:19,120
好不容易处得来点了

264
00:11:19,150 --> 00:11:21,440
作为朋友 你应该去跟他谈谈啊

265
00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:23,350
不 我要等到我临终的时候

266
00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:25,290
写进遗言里 然后立刻死掉

267
00:11:25,290 --> 00:11:27,180
你就打算这么处理这事儿

268
00:11:27,180 --> 00:11:28,620
什么事儿我都打算这么处理

269
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:30,720
我打算这样拿下77场吵架

270
00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:33,310
这办法不太好吧

271
00:11:33,310 --> 00:11:35,350
现在是78场了

272
00:11:40,310 --> 00:11:43,340
Rex Buckingham 为您效劳

273
00:11:43,340 --> 00:11:44,210
简直华丽

274
00:11:44,210 --> 00:11:47,010
制服护膝助我赢得最酷击杀奖

275
00:11:47,010 --> 00:11:50,890
别告诉我 老Buckingham是这里唯一有招牌动作的人

276
00:11:50,890 --> 00:11:54,480
不是的 我在练习一个打光子弹后的动作

277
00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:58,090
我把弹仓松落下开然后踢向对手咽喉

278
00:11:58,090 --> 00:12:00,360
哦 我的屁洞

279
00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:01,520
喔

280
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:03,930
行了 我知道你屁股上有两处枪伤

281
00:12:03,930 --> 00:12:06,050
但你别管那叫屁洞了

282
00:12:06,050 --> 00:12:08,770
你知道横着拿枪看着很酷吧

283
00:12:08,770 --> 00:12:12,580
这让我想到 要是我把枪倒过来拿呢

284
00:12:12,580 --> 00:12:14,160
你可以试试

285
00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:16,020
绝对不会用的 我的美国朋友

286
00:12:16,630 --> 00:12:18,270
82片区完成了 注意

287
00:12:19,180 --> 00:12:21,000
嘿 怎么样

288
00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:22,140
很顺利

289
00:12:22,140 --> 00:12:23,640
我们完成得很完美

290
00:12:23,640 --> 00:12:26,720
不是吹嘘 我觉得我们刚创下了纽约警局训练记录

291
00:12:27,220 --> 00:12:28,090
绝对是吹嘘

292
00:12:28,090 --> 00:12:30,520
训练记录 太酷了

293
00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:31,620
哦 谢谢 我好兴奋

294
00:12:31,620 --> 00:12:32,520
嘿 祝你好运

295
00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:33,700
- 谢谢  - 好的

296
00:12:37,460 --> 00:12:40,070
好了 聚过来 我们要上了

297
00:12:40,070 --> 00:12:41,140
Rex 你口音哪去了

298
00:12:41,140 --> 00:12:42,630
别管那个了 我们认真点

299
00:12:42,630 --> 00:12:43,650
好 数到三

300
00:12:43,650 --> 00:12:45,850
一起打破记录 我们是最好的片区

301
00:12:45,850 --> 00:12:47,640
准备好了吗 1 2 3

302
00:12:47,640 --> 00:12:50,410
一起打破记录 "最我好们的是片区"

303
00:12:50,490 --> 00:12:52,450
好啦 口号是长了点 上吧

304
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:57,840
好 我来说下模拟训练的细节

305
00:12:57,840 --> 00:12:59,960
一伙武装分子进入了大使馆

306
00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:01,110
挟持了人质

307
00:13:01,110 --> 00:13:02,840
- 哪国大使馆  - 这不重要

308
00:13:02,840 --> 00:13:04,130
好 那就是加拿大

309
00:13:04,130 --> 00:13:06,960
那么是要找出罪犯 疏散平民 救出人质吗

310
00:13:06,960 --> 00:13:07,730
是的

311
00:13:07,730 --> 00:13:09,630
这次是允许自主射击的

312
00:13:09,630 --> 00:13:11,550
你们可以最大程度地使用火力

313
00:13:11,550 --> 00:13:12,850
"最大程度地使用火力"

314
00:13:12,850 --> 00:13:14,650
这算什么 侏罗纪公园之旅吗

315
00:13:14,650 --> 00:13:16,720
Diaz和Boyle 外围警戒

316
00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:17,490
我和Boyle吗

317
00:13:17,490 --> 00:13:19,460
是 就你们俩

318
00:13:19,460 --> 00:13:22,020
Peralta和Santiago 你们是突击小组

319
00:13:22,020 --> 00:13:23,410
我在指挥中心

320
00:13:23,410 --> 00:13:25,330
Scully 你什么也不用做

321
00:13:25,330 --> 00:13:27,380
只要站在我身边 说"是 长官"

322
00:13:27,380 --> 00:13:28,010
好吧 长官

323
00:13:28,010 --> 00:13:29,340
拜托 老兄

324
00:13:29,340 --> 00:13:30,510
好了 注意听我说

325
00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:32,960
我们有18分钟41秒来破纪录

326
00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:33,960
别搞砸

327
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:36,070
喔 你真的不要角色扮演吗

328
00:13:36,070 --> 00:13:38,630
Rex "Bookinghame"哪儿去了

329
00:13:38,630 --> 00:13:40,740
别再学那种口音了

330
00:13:40,740 --> 00:13:42,080
我是在角色扮演

331
00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:45,340
一个只想着创造训练记录的严肃警探

332
00:13:45,750 --> 00:13:46,750
他的名字是Vic Kovac

333
00:13:46,750 --> 00:13:48,020
前海豹突击队员

334
00:13:48,020 --> 00:13:48,930
被人出卖后留下来等死

335
00:13:48,930 --> 00:13:50,620
我没时间说他的背景故事 警长

336
00:13:50,620 --> 00:13:52,730
好吧 大伙 冲

337
00:13:58,130 --> 00:13:59,200
警监

338
00:13:59,940 --> 00:14:01,010
警监

339
00:14:05,360 --> 00:14:07,060
- 警监  -不好意思

340
00:14:08,940 --> 00:14:11,070
我正要进入星星城呢

341
00:14:11,070 --> 00:14:12,900
他们给游戏设置了这些白痴关卡

342
00:14:12,900 --> 00:14:15,300
好让你有过关的错觉

343
00:14:15,610 --> 00:14:17,700
那就别玩了

344
00:14:18,890 --> 00:14:22,040
但是我正要进入星星城呢

345
00:14:22,850 --> 00:14:24,270
Gina 我遇到麻烦了

346
00:14:24,890 --> 00:14:26,870
这游戏已经影响到我的工作了

347
00:14:26,870 --> 00:14:28,990
3号和4号 换一下位置

348
00:14:32,900 --> 00:14:34,220
小蛋糕 消除

349
00:14:34,610 --> 00:14:37,370
我不明白我咋就停不下来呢

350
00:14:37,370 --> 00:14:39,440
我从来没有自我控制方面的问题

351
00:14:39,440 --> 00:14:41,270
你知道我喜欢牛奶吗

352
00:14:41,270 --> 00:14:42,460
呃 不知道

353
00:14:42,460 --> 00:14:43,910
我是很喜欢 但是牛奶对我的胃不好

354
00:14:43,910 --> 00:14:46,510
所以我已经有19年没喝过我钟爱的牛奶了

355
00:14:46,510 --> 00:14:49,370
整整19年没牛奶的日子

356
00:14:49,370 --> 00:14:53,320
但是不知什么原因 我无法戒掉轰狂蛋糕

357
00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:54,900
我知道该怎么办

358
00:14:55,290 --> 00:14:56,450
Hitchcock

359
00:14:56,450 --> 00:14:58,190
你玩过轰狂蛋糕没

360
00:14:58,190 --> 00:15:00,160
我爱死那游戏了

361
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:02,120
我都打到星星城了

362
00:15:02,160 --> 00:15:04,090
天呐 真有趣

363
00:15:04,090 --> 00:15:06,640
你打到哪关了  Holt警监

364
00:15:08,330 --> 00:15:09,520
星星城

365
00:15:09,520 --> 00:15:12,300
咱俩的共同点太多了

366
00:15:14,300 --> 00:15:16,000
看到没  我被治愈了

367
00:15:25,550 --> 00:15:26,380
转身

368
00:15:26,380 --> 00:15:27,600
安全

369
00:15:33,370 --> 00:15:34,760
安全

370
00:15:38,070 --> 00:15:38,800
安全

371
00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:45,060
好样的

372
00:15:45,070 --> 00:15:47,340
好了 只剩下三个罪犯了

373
00:15:47,500 --> 00:15:49,300
我们也许能成功呢

374
00:15:49,300 --> 00:15:51,600
比起Jake Peralta我更喜欢Vic Kovac

375
00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:53,010
是啊 Kovac

376
00:15:53,010 --> 00:15:55,470
让我们抓到那个杀害我妹妹的凶手

377
00:15:55,470 --> 00:15:57,500
要让他血债血偿

378
00:15:57,500 --> 00:15:59,030
你不是被人出卖留着等死的么

379
00:15:59,030 --> 00:16:00,440
不敢相信你还记得呢

380
00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:02,880
我也不敢相信我居然没用死妹妹这招

381
00:16:02,880 --> 00:16:04,420
情感上要丰富多了

382
00:16:04,970 --> 00:16:08,460
Peralta 我们有情报显示人质在409房间

383
00:16:08,750 --> 00:16:09,750
知道了

384
00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:13,920
我喜欢这里 闻起来总想刚刚粉刷完

385
00:16:13,920 --> 00:16:15,730
使我想起了我那颠沛流离的童年

386
00:16:15,730 --> 00:16:18,200
闭嘴 你会暴露位置的

387
00:16:19,230 --> 00:16:20,230
小心

388
00:16:21,620 --> 00:16:22,930
不是吧

389
00:16:23,560 --> 00:16:24,470
刚刚真险

390
00:16:24,500 --> 00:16:25,840
你头发上有油漆

391
00:16:25,840 --> 00:16:28,270
好了 我就直说了

392
00:16:28,270 --> 00:16:29,270
你让我很生气

393
00:16:29,270 --> 00:16:30,190
天呐

394
00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:31,770
我本想临终再说的

395
00:16:31,770 --> 00:16:34,710
但很显然我可能会意外地就死在走廊里了 所以

396
00:16:35,710 --> 00:16:38,180
你没邀请我参加婚礼 我很伤心

397
00:16:38,180 --> 00:16:39,970
我以为我们是朋友

398
00:16:39,970 --> 00:16:42,040
对不起 只是

399
00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:43,650
Vivian觉得请你去会很怪的

400
00:16:43,660 --> 00:16:45,500
你知道 我曾经

401
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:48,790
全心全意地爱着你什么的

402
00:16:48,830 --> 00:16:51,960
没事 我懂

403
00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:53,360
嘿 谢谢你射那个人

404
00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:55,500
嘿 我很荣幸

405
00:16:55,530 --> 00:16:56,900
荣幸

406
00:16:56,900 --> 00:16:58,730
你可是刚杀了人

407
00:16:58,730 --> 00:17:00,930
罪犯Bill是有家庭的

408
00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:03,470
哦 哇

409
00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:05,500
人质在那里面

410
00:17:05,500 --> 00:17:07,850
情报显示有几个全副武装的罪犯守着他们

411
00:17:07,850 --> 00:17:09,630
要等候支援吗

412
00:17:09,630 --> 00:17:12,840
没时间了 离记录只有1分12秒了

413
00:17:12,840 --> 00:17:14,280
我要进去了

414
00:17:14,310 --> 00:17:16,950
别担心 我有击败他们的计策

415
00:17:16,950 --> 00:17:17,950
投降

416
00:17:17,950 --> 00:17:19,070
啥

417
00:17:19,070 --> 00:17:21,950
信不信由你 反正我要这么干了

418
00:17:21,990 --> 00:17:24,090
纽约警察 别开枪

419
00:17:24,120 --> 00:17:25,570
我来投降的

420
00:17:25,570 --> 00:17:28,080
放人质走 我来替他们

421
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:29,110
不可能

422
00:17:29,110 --> 00:17:30,170
放下武器

423
00:17:30,170 --> 00:17:32,440
好好 我松开扳机了

424
00:17:32,440 --> 00:17:35,100
我会慢慢把枪放在面前

425
00:17:35,100 --> 00:17:36,630
慢慢地

426
00:17:36,630 --> 00:17:38,080
哦 该死

427
00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:38,960
Terry 多少时间

428
00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:42,730
18分钟28秒 破纪录啦

429
00:17:42,740 --> 00:17:44,240
太棒了

430
00:17:44,270 --> 00:17:45,290
干得好

431
00:17:45,290 --> 00:17:47,180
这是我们应该做的 老奶奶

432
00:17:47,180 --> 00:17:50,120
我们应该做的

433
00:17:51,220 --> 00:17:52,890
啊 他来啦

434
00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:54,040
好耶

435
00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:55,940
记录是我们的了

436
00:17:55,940 --> 00:17:57,790
太棒了 Jake

437
00:17:57,790 --> 00:17:59,630
来看看 我拿了奖品

438
00:17:59,630 --> 00:18:01,700
赞 "受害者"

439
00:18:00,630 --> 00:18:01,400
尸体

440
00:18:01,700 --> 00:18:04,370
不敢相信你最后一击用的是Scully的手法

441
00:18:02,750 --> 00:18:05,930
宝宝

442
00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:06,070
你用了倒挂金钩射击法吗

443
00:18:06,070 --> 00:18:07,970
我这么叫它是因为你把枪倒过来拿

444
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:09,960
是的 Scully 我用了倒挂金钩

445
00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:11,770
你们不准再提这事儿

446
00:18:11,810 --> 00:18:14,600
可我想说唉 你看起来真蠢

447
00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,310
我感觉真好

448
00:18:16,310 --> 00:18:18,750
差点就让要我开始一直这么严肃下去了

449
00:18:18,750 --> 00:18:21,720
接着我又想 "蠢蛋 狗屁 蠢蛋 管他呢"

450
00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:23,520
好 走吧 我请大家喝一杯

451
00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:26,270
太好了 99片区 走啦

452
00:18:26,270 --> 00:18:28,240
实际上 Teddy请我吃饭

453
00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:30,450
要么我吃过饭再来找你们

454
00:18:30,450 --> 00:18:34,140
哦 好 当然了

455
00:18:34,140 --> 00:18:35,140
好嘞

456
00:18:35,140 --> 00:18:37,270
蠢蛋 狗屁 蠢蛋 管他呢

457
00:18:40,540 --> 00:18:42,910
我刚和Vivian说过了

458
00:18:42,940 --> 00:18:44,570
我告诉她我很想让你来参加婚礼

459
00:18:44,570 --> 00:18:45,570
她说可以

460
00:18:45,580 --> 00:18:47,310
谢谢 很高兴能去

461
00:18:47,340 --> 00:18:50,650
还有 "STD"是"性病"的意思

462
00:18:50,650 --> 00:18:51,710
是的

463
00:18:51,710 --> 00:18:53,880
但是重新印制请帖太贵了

464
00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:55,680
所以我们只能将就了

465
00:18:55,680 --> 00:18:58,430
Rosie Diaz 接受我的"STD"吗

466
00:18:58,430 --> 00:19:01,050
我一直很期待

467
00:19:01,050 --> 00:19:02,690
呵呵

468
00:19:03,370 --> 00:19:06,210
恭喜大家 表现很完美

469
00:19:06,210 --> 00:19:08,630
并且创造新的训练纪录

470
00:19:08,630 --> 00:19:10,960
也要恭喜你 警监

471
00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:12,960
克服了轰狂蛋糕成瘾

472
00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:14,480
敬Holt警监

473
00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:17,650
好啦好啦 我忍不住说出来 我天性八卦

474
00:19:17,690 --> 00:19:21,630
今天你帮了我 所以这次你让我当众难堪就算了

475
00:19:21,630 --> 00:19:22,610
谢谢

476
00:19:22,610 --> 00:19:25,300
我觉得我对这游戏没抵抗力

477
00:19:25,300 --> 00:19:27,540
是因为科技演已经发展到

478
00:19:27,570 --> 00:19:28,810
我不知道

479
00:19:28,810 --> 00:19:31,410
我觉得它就是欢快 傻瓜 又有趣

480
00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:32,610
太有趣了

481
00:19:32,610 --> 00:19:35,240
- 非常有趣  - 非常有趣

482
00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:40,940
怎么啦 Vic Kovac

483
00:19:40,940 --> 00:19:42,840
你说Amy看上Teddy啥了

484
00:19:42,870 --> 00:19:44,960
- 这么说你真的喜欢她  - 我只是好奇

485
00:19:44,960 --> 00:19:46,640
我觉得他样子还行

486
00:19:46,650 --> 00:19:47,390
也是个好警察

487
00:19:47,390 --> 00:19:49,360
他们都是警察呆子

488
00:19:49,360 --> 00:19:50,700
还有他创造了训练记录

489
00:19:50,700 --> 00:19:53,170
但没什么了不起 我20分钟后就破了他的记录

490
00:19:53,630 --> 00:19:56,070
你想知道为什么她和他约会而不是和你吗

491
00:19:56,070 --> 00:19:57,170
想

492
00:19:57,420 --> 00:19:59,280
因为他采取行动约她了

493
00:20:02,840 --> 00:20:04,570
嘿 Vivian

494
00:20:04,610 --> 00:20:05,980
Rosa

495
00:20:05,980 --> 00:20:07,580
我来这里一起庆祝

496
00:20:07,580 --> 00:20:10,010
听着 虽然我不太会说话

497
00:20:10,610 --> 00:20:12,640
谢谢你邀请我参加你们婚礼

498
00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:13,850
很高兴我能去

499
00:20:13,850 --> 00:20:15,270
我保证不会怪怪的

500
00:20:15,270 --> 00:20:16,850
是啊 我也很高兴

501
00:20:16,850 --> 00:20:18,580
因为我本来觉得你来不了

502
00:20:18,580 --> 00:20:19,230
什么意思

503
00:20:19,230 --> 00:20:21,430
Chuck告诉我 你那个周末会出城

504
00:20:21,430 --> 00:20:23,590
然后他告诉我你行程有变

505
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:26,370
所以么 真是个好消息

506
00:20:26,700 --> 00:20:28,380
为什么你来会怪怪的

507
00:20:28,380 --> 00:20:31,170
因为我是怪人

508
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:32,200
哦

509
00:20:32,210 --> 00:20:35,770
呜

510
00:20:36,390 --> 00:20:37,360
我要走了

511
00:20:40,530 --> 00:20:41,720
晚安 各位

512
00:20:41,720 --> 00:20:43,890
嘿 Amy 看看这个

513
00:20:43,890 --> 00:20:45,700
不会吧 你赢了最酷击杀奖吗

514
00:20:45,700 --> 00:20:46,780
大错特错

515
00:20:46,780 --> 00:20:49,850
其实每个人都可以给自己买一个儿童空手道奖杯

516
00:20:49,850 --> 00:20:50,830
- 聪明  - 是啊

517
00:20:50,830 --> 00:20:54,530
嘿 你走前问你件事儿好吗

518
00:20:54,530 --> 00:20:55,500
问吧

519
00:20:55,500 --> 00:20:57,720
我想知道

520
00:20:57,720 --> 00:20:59,090
你涂了口红吗

521
00:20:59,100 --> 00:21:01,530
是啊 我又要跟Teddy约会了

522
00:21:01,530 --> 00:21:02,630
看着会怪吗

523
00:21:02,630 --> 00:21:04,470
我向我13岁的侄女求助化妆技巧

524
00:21:04,470 --> 00:21:06,140
不过我不知道能不能信她

525
00:21:06,140 --> 00:21:07,610
她很性感

526
00:21:07,850 --> 00:21:09,210
你很漂亮

527
00:21:09,210 --> 00:21:11,380
谢谢

528
00:21:12,120 --> 00:21:13,720
那你什么事儿

529
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:15,450
哦 没啥大事

530
00:21:15,450 --> 00:21:16,850
我本想问你工作的事情

531
00:21:16,850 --> 00:21:19,180
不过你还是好好约会吧 明天再说

532
00:21:19,750 --> 00:21:20,820
好的

533
00:21:20,830 --> 00:21:22,710
- 再见  - 再见

534
00:21:25,820 --> 00:21:28,210
工作上的事儿我来帮你好了

535
00:21:29,510 --> 00:21:30,510
好极了


