1
00:00:03,580 --> 00:00:05,320
简直绝了

2
00:00:05,320 --> 00:00:07,820
你们估计是对这玩意很好奇

3
00:00:07,820 --> 00:00:08,820
没啥大不了的

4
00:00:08,820 --> 00:00:09,990
我的车还在店里

5
00:00:09,990 --> 00:00:12,290
所以我是坐Rosa的摩托车来的

6
00:00:12,290 --> 00:00:14,790
你们应该可以叫我汽车发烧友了

7
00:00:15,050 --> 00:00:15,990
他死命地抱着我

8
00:00:15,990 --> 00:00:17,460
感觉像是做了两公里的海姆利克急救法

9
00:00:17,460 --> 00:00:20,200
因为四周空空如也 坐起来心慌啊

10
00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:22,630
警监 你为啥坐在我的位子上

11
00:00:22,630 --> 00:00:25,740
内务局的Miller警督来了

12
00:00:25,740 --> 00:00:27,540
他接管了我的办公室

13
00:00:27,540 --> 00:00:30,230
很明显 有人向犯罪组织

14
00:00:30,230 --> 00:00:31,170
泄露了机密情报

15
00:00:31,180 --> 00:00:33,100
整个小队都面临着审查

16
00:00:33,100 --> 00:00:34,340
疯了吧

17
00:00:34,350 --> 00:00:35,500
这里没人会是奸细

18
00:00:35,500 --> 00:00:36,610
你怎么这么确定

19
00:00:36,610 --> 00:00:37,680
因为我太了解他们了

20
00:00:37,680 --> 00:00:38,820
我了解他们的一切

21
00:00:38,820 --> 00:00:40,220
如果你觉得别人都一成不变

22
00:00:40,220 --> 00:00:42,110
那你就不是个好警官

23
00:00:42,110 --> 00:00:44,090
他们的确一成不变 来 看好了

24
00:00:44,090 --> 00:00:45,720
我知道每个人今晚要做的事

25
00:00:45,720 --> 00:00:48,310
今天是周四 所以Gina要早退

26
00:00:48,310 --> 00:00:50,760
去和她的新舞伴"劲舞腹黑女"排练

27
00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:52,300
她们是舞蹈界的第一夫人

28
00:00:52,300 --> 00:00:54,390
Amy会清点她的每周预算

29
00:00:54,390 --> 00:00:57,500
Charles会参加"单人比萨"厨艺班

30
00:00:57,500 --> 00:00:59,540
今晚的食谱是"独乐乐"辣香肠

31
00:00:59,550 --> 00:01:01,670
还有 如果我冲过去跳向Terry

32
00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:03,880
他一定会用双臂接住我

33
00:01:03,890 --> 00:01:06,740
- 来喽  - 不行 我正端着咖啡呢

34
00:01:06,740 --> 00:01:08,200
神烦警探 第二季 第五集

35
00:01:28,050 --> 00:01:30,240
我马上要坐下来解决内务了

36
00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:32,520
我发现我可以用自己的"内务"

37
00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:34,630
来迷惑住他们

38
00:01:34,630 --> 00:01:36,150
指的是我的肚肚

39
00:01:36,150 --> 00:01:37,400
别在这开玩笑了

40
00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:38,760
我知道你常和我玩闹说笑

41
00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:41,800
但是内务探员很难有我这样的幽默感

42
00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:44,920
哇 你真的是很担心这次调查呢

43
00:01:44,930 --> 00:01:46,200
好吧 好啦

44
00:01:46,210 --> 00:01:48,810
我保证在录口供时表现得凛若冰霜

45
00:01:48,810 --> 00:01:52,040
我甚至会换上严肃脸

46
00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:53,950
你猜我是怎么做出这张脸的

47
00:01:53,950 --> 00:01:55,280
我正在回忆自己八岁的时候

48
00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:57,280
被Don Mattingly叫做"小屎蛋"的事

49
00:01:57,280 --> 00:01:59,350
- 他说得对吗  - 对的

50
00:02:00,520 --> 00:02:01,560
你好

51
00:02:01,570 --> 00:02:03,960
我是Jake Peralta

52
00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:07,590
抱歉 握手是细菌传染的最主要方式

53
00:02:07,590 --> 00:02:10,060
我一般都是点个头完事

54
00:02:10,060 --> 00:02:11,300
好吧

55
00:02:11,300 --> 00:02:15,070
你可不可以 把消毒洗手液递给我

56
00:02:15,070 --> 00:02:16,170
好的

57
00:02:16,170 --> 00:02:17,330
别 别 别

58
00:02:17,330 --> 00:02:18,830
用你的手肘

59
00:02:19,190 --> 00:02:20,560
把你的鼻孔闭上

60
00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:22,110
别把气喷上去

61
00:02:23,610 --> 00:02:25,240
算了 我还是用湿巾吧

62
00:02:25,240 --> 00:02:26,790
真机智 逃过一劫

63
00:02:26,790 --> 00:02:28,280
该死的细菌

64
00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:32,620
那么 是谁泄露了什么信息

65
00:02:32,620 --> 00:02:34,250
你不需要知道

66
00:02:34,250 --> 00:02:35,620
你要知道的只是

67
00:02:35,620 --> 00:02:38,060
你们小队里的某人已经犯下了重罪

68
00:02:38,060 --> 00:02:39,690
而我要把那个人查出来

69
00:02:39,690 --> 00:02:43,020
你是否曾经将调查中的案件的

70
00:02:43,020 --> 00:02:46,230
重要信息带出过警局

71
00:02:46,230 --> 00:02:47,370
没有过

72
00:02:47,370 --> 00:02:49,630
我可不会干那种傻缺事

73
00:02:49,640 --> 00:02:51,820
我干了件巨傻缺的事 帮帮我

74
00:02:51,820 --> 00:02:53,990
你也知道我是那种

75
00:02:53,990 --> 00:02:55,370
骑着摩托来上班

76
00:02:55,370 --> 00:02:57,110
并以正义之名打破规矩的不羁型男吧

77
00:02:57,110 --> 00:02:58,510
我有种不好的预感

78
00:02:58,510 --> 00:03:00,650
好吧 我偶尔也会往家里带些案件卷宗

79
00:03:00,650 --> 00:03:01,980
用来在下班后钻研

80
00:03:01,980 --> 00:03:03,780
而且我并不是很擅长把它们还回去

81
00:03:03,780 --> 00:03:04,740
我的天呐

82
00:03:04,740 --> 00:03:06,780
你是不是拜倒在我的不羁本色下了

83
00:03:06,780 --> 00:03:08,250
- 不是  - 居然不是

84
00:03:08,250 --> 00:03:09,620
你可能会因为这个被停职调查的

85
00:03:09,620 --> 00:03:10,690
他会认为你是奸细

86
00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:11,860
能小声点吗

87
00:03:11,860 --> 00:03:14,430
是啊 Amy 喝酒用碗才能避免"间隙"

88
00:03:14,890 --> 00:03:15,760
绝对骗过他了

89
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:17,000
听着 我需要找回那些文件

90
00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:18,230
你能不能载我一程

91
00:03:18,230 --> 00:03:19,860
好吧 我这就去

92
00:03:19,870 --> 00:03:21,870
但是到时候最好别反咬我一口

93
00:03:21,870 --> 00:03:23,430
"最好别反咬我一口"是你的性爱录像带的名字

94
00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:26,100
但是说真的 非常感谢你的帮助

95
00:03:26,110 --> 00:03:27,270
Peralta

96
00:03:27,270 --> 00:03:28,470
和Miller谈得怎样

97
00:03:28,470 --> 00:03:29,710
一切顺利 他可喜欢我了

98
00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:30,920
我是想再往细了跟你说

99
00:03:30,920 --> 00:03:31,970
但是某人刚刚走了进来

100
00:03:31,970 --> 00:03:35,880
打算找她的斑点外套

101
00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:37,140
你好啊 Raymond

102
00:03:37,590 --> 00:03:38,480
Madeline

103
00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:41,790
我还奇怪为什么鸟儿突然停止了歌唱

104
00:03:41,790 --> 00:03:42,790
你怎么来了

105
00:03:42,790 --> 00:03:45,160
我听说你被内务局审查了

106
00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:46,260
我可不想错过这个场景

107
00:03:46,260 --> 00:03:47,890
你这么枕戈待旦地打听我的消息

108
00:03:47,890 --> 00:03:50,760
真可惜你的头没被卡车碾炸

109
00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:51,960
生动逼真

110
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:54,330
究竟哪一天 你才能辞去警务

111
00:03:54,330 --> 00:03:55,930
追求你的诗歌梦呢

112
00:03:55,930 --> 00:03:58,390
我在找Scully探员

113
00:03:58,390 --> 00:03:59,700
你一定是从内务局来的了

114
00:03:59,710 --> 00:04:02,640
我是Wuntch副局长 幸会

115
00:04:02,730 --> 00:04:03,800
如果你有空的话

116
00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:05,910
请务必向我详细汇报这次的审查情况

117
00:04:05,910 --> 00:04:08,080
内务局是独立于部门分级的机构

118
00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:09,950
我不需要向你汇报

119
00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:11,750
Scully探员 该你了

120
00:04:11,750 --> 00:04:13,220
哦 呃 好的

121
00:04:14,390 --> 00:04:15,990
不 这样吧

122
00:04:15,990 --> 00:04:17,390
咱们打电话谈吧

123
00:04:17,390 --> 00:04:18,640
喔 Raymond

124
00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:20,590
瞧瞧这内务审查

125
00:04:20,590 --> 00:04:23,160
瞧瞧这没缉到毒的缉毒特遣队

126
00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:24,900
这片区真是完蛋了

127
00:04:24,900 --> 00:04:26,970
也许这才是鸟儿不再歌唱的原因

128
00:04:26,970 --> 00:04:29,170
出于对你职业生涯濒死的敬重

129
00:04:29,170 --> 00:04:31,000
再见了 Raymond

130
00:04:32,740 --> 00:04:33,740
Diaz探员

131
00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:35,840
你的缉毒特遣队能不能稍稍地

132
00:04:35,840 --> 00:04:37,220
给我报告一丁点喜讯

133
00:04:37,220 --> 00:04:39,250
喜讯就是我马上就能报告完

134
00:04:39,250 --> 00:04:40,170
没喜讯

135
00:04:40,170 --> 00:04:43,680
抱歉 我不得不去劝双胞胎去剪头发

136
00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:46,120
有些和棒棒糖有关的承诺

137
00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:47,940
我是不打算信守的

138
00:04:47,940 --> 00:04:50,020
特遣队还是有成效的

139
00:04:50,020 --> 00:04:51,820
但是我们还没有找到任何上层毒枭

140
00:04:51,820 --> 00:04:53,560
或者主要藏毒点

141
00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:54,860
但是我们也快了

142
00:04:54,870 --> 00:04:56,130
这是个承诺吗

143
00:04:56,130 --> 00:04:59,060
或者只是另一根谁也舔不到的棒棒糖

144
00:04:59,060 --> 00:05:01,120
Wuntch正坐等这支特遣队失败

145
00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:03,300
我需要实际结果

146
00:05:03,300 --> 00:05:05,940
警长会和我到电子图书馆里当卧底

147
00:05:05,940 --> 00:05:08,390
那是个静音迪厅 大家都戴着耳机

148
00:05:08,390 --> 00:05:09,740
这其实是非常尊重邻居的表现

149
00:05:09,740 --> 00:05:11,440
不包括那些下流的动作和呕吐

150
00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:13,180
舞厅里一般都有摇头丸之类的东西

151
00:05:13,180 --> 00:05:15,510
但愿我们能在那里找到些猪咯咯

152
00:05:15,510 --> 00:05:18,970
好 但愿那里有不少贩毒活动

153
00:05:18,970 --> 00:05:22,250
当然 最好 还是没有任何人

154
00:05:22,250 --> 00:05:24,400
敢在那儿或者片区内任何地方吸毒

155
00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:26,040
但是如果毒品一定会被发现的话

156
00:05:26,040 --> 00:05:27,530
那它最好在那儿

157
00:05:27,530 --> 00:05:29,390
拜托 老天 让它在那儿吧

158
00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:31,190
后备箱

159
00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:39,630
好 就是这些了 一盒子文件

160
00:05:39,630 --> 00:05:42,710
还有一盒子我床底下的蘸粉甜甜圈

161
00:05:42,710 --> 00:05:43,880
喔太好啦 我能看看吗

162
00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:44,880
当然没问题

163
00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:46,340
谢啦

164
00:05:46,340 --> 00:05:47,780
喔 别别别

165
00:05:47,780 --> 00:05:49,010
这是辆新车

166
00:05:49,010 --> 00:05:50,160
我不会让你用甜甜圈粉

167
00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:51,340
把它搞得跟你似的

168
00:05:52,280 --> 00:05:53,420
说出来不太好意思

169
00:05:53,420 --> 00:05:55,390
我们还得再去个地方

170
00:05:55,390 --> 00:05:56,920
还有些文件在我以前住的地方

171
00:05:56,930 --> 00:05:58,560
也就是 Gina的公寓

172
00:05:58,560 --> 00:06:00,290
呃 好吧 我给她打电话

173
00:06:01,390 --> 00:06:02,830
哇 有好多炫酷的按钮

174
00:06:02,830 --> 00:06:03,890
在你的方向盘上诶

175
00:06:03,890 --> 00:06:05,370
就像是间谍车一样 好酷的

176
00:06:05,370 --> 00:06:06,540
来 让我打给她

177
00:06:07,730 --> 00:06:10,740
爱车呀 拨叫Gina Linetti

178
00:06:10,740 --> 00:06:11,740
你那嗓音是闹什么

179
00:06:11,740 --> 00:06:13,000
那是我的间谍专用嗓音

180
00:06:13,010 --> 00:06:15,440
爱车呀 激活鬼影状态

181
00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:17,040
那是座椅加热器

182
00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:18,080
哇 比火箭还厉害

183
00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:19,280
我的屁屁刚好很冷

184
00:06:19,280 --> 00:06:20,520
这是Gina的手机

185
00:06:20,520 --> 00:06:21,380
请给我留言

186
00:06:21,380 --> 00:06:23,950
反正我不会收的 因为这又不是1993年

187
00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:25,150
我们不论如何也得过去

188
00:06:25,150 --> 00:06:26,900
她可能是因为舞蹈排练所以关机了

189
00:06:26,900 --> 00:06:29,350
天呐 这内务局的家伙真是太磨人了

190
00:06:29,360 --> 00:06:31,620
但是我还有好消息的 倒数三

191
00:06:31,620 --> 00:06:32,620
二

192
00:06:32,630 --> 00:06:33,760
口袋甜甜圈

193
00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:35,130
不要

194
00:06:35,660 --> 00:06:37,840
弄得到处都是了

195
00:06:37,840 --> 00:06:38,760
备用的啦

196
00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:43,030
Gina 开下门

197
00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:47,610
所幸我还留着钥匙

198
00:06:48,710 --> 00:06:49,740
来吧

199
00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:56,250
我的天呐

200
00:06:57,410 --> 00:06:59,020
天呐

201
00:07:00,780 --> 00:07:03,680
这什么情况

202
00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:05,250
Gina和我是随性床伴

203
00:07:06,250 --> 00:07:07,290
恶

204
00:07:07,290 --> 00:07:08,790
你们俩这事多久了

205
00:07:08,790 --> 00:07:10,460
我们夏天勾搭上了一次

206
00:07:10,460 --> 00:07:13,350
然后差不多一个月前 噩梦重启了

207
00:07:13,350 --> 00:07:15,160
从那之后 "高潮"迭起啊

208
00:07:16,200 --> 00:07:17,200
恶

209
00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:18,360
恶心 肮脏 对吧

210
00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:19,360
慢着

211
00:07:19,370 --> 00:07:21,070
你骗了我么

212
00:07:21,070 --> 00:07:23,840
今晚没有"单人比萨"厨艺班

213
00:07:23,840 --> 00:07:25,640
你骗了我好几个星期

214
00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:26,940
今晚我没空

215
00:07:26,940 --> 00:07:28,970
我要教市中心的孩子们做蜡烛

216
00:07:28,970 --> 00:07:30,040
不好意思

217
00:07:30,040 --> 00:07:31,840
我要去上产前瑜伽课

218
00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:34,680
去不了 我要去学翻跟斗

219
00:07:34,680 --> 00:07:36,380
没错 我对你撒谎了

220
00:07:36,380 --> 00:07:39,070
但是你像看体操健将一样看我

221
00:07:39,070 --> 00:07:40,250
我多么希望我真的是

222
00:07:40,250 --> 00:07:43,760
你还假装手上擦了镁粉来上班

223
00:07:43,760 --> 00:07:45,520
你不再是我认识的那个人了

224
00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:46,490
我要走了

225
00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:48,960
拿完旧案子的档案我就走

226
00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,260
别生气啊 Jake 我没变

227
00:07:51,260 --> 00:07:52,660
我还是你认识的Charles

228
00:07:52,670 --> 00:07:54,630
我只是多学了四个体位

229
00:07:54,630 --> 00:07:56,730
五个 差点忘了还有"夫君在上"

230
00:07:56,740 --> 00:07:57,710
啊

231
00:08:11,470 --> 00:08:13,320
Terry

232
00:08:14,090 --> 00:08:17,120
居然有人管这个叫"静音迪厅"

233
00:08:17,120 --> 00:08:18,760
这不是迪斯科

234
00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:20,860
这我懂 我小时候迪斯科火着呢

235
00:08:24,780 --> 00:08:27,770
小Terry可喜欢哈娑舞了

236
00:08:27,770 --> 00:08:30,030
老板 给我来杯水

237
00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:31,070
点得好

238
00:08:31,070 --> 00:08:32,540
猪咯咯吃多了会脱水的

239
00:08:32,540 --> 00:08:34,370
我不嗑药

240
00:08:34,370 --> 00:08:35,540
我连酒都不喝

241
00:08:35,540 --> 00:08:36,770
你这T恤

242
00:08:36,780 --> 00:08:38,240
我女儿也在"学林"上课

243
00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:40,240
你是在哪个复古小店里淘来的吗

244
00:08:40,250 --> 00:08:41,480
我也上过"学林"

245
00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:42,950
我在海豚班

246
00:08:42,950 --> 00:08:45,120
你还不嗑药不喝酒

247
00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:46,950
这瓶水免费送你

248
00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:50,890
- 她毫无用处  - 不能这么说

249
00:08:50,890 --> 00:08:52,590
起码我知道我家孩子选对学校了

250
00:08:52,590 --> 00:08:54,730
她们学前班出来的都是好孩子

251
00:08:54,730 --> 00:08:55,730
是啊 我真是等不及要把这事

252
00:08:55,730 --> 00:08:58,330
在特遣队汇报上告诉Holt呢

253
00:08:58,330 --> 00:09:00,900
我们要去找几个上了

254
00:09:00,900 --> 00:09:03,530
低水平学前班的坏孩子了

255
00:09:03,540 --> 00:09:05,400
奇了怪了

256
00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,410
还有什么奸情是我们不知道的

257
00:09:07,410 --> 00:09:09,040
Rosa和Terry吗 Holt和Scully吗

258
00:09:09,040 --> 00:09:10,810
你和Hitchcock吗

259
00:09:10,810 --> 00:09:12,370
你得忘了这事 听见没

260
00:09:12,370 --> 00:09:14,480
你得进去把文件放回原处

261
00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:17,160
慢着慢着 凭什么我被分给Hitchcock

262
00:09:17,170 --> 00:09:19,250
因为你们俩除了性别全都一样

263
00:09:19,750 --> 00:09:20,690
这次也多谢帮忙

264
00:09:20,690 --> 00:09:22,120
- 好了 晚安  - 什

265
00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:24,790
嘿 警监

266
00:09:24,790 --> 00:09:27,030
不介意我们坐这吧

267
00:09:27,030 --> 00:09:28,280
一切顺利吗

268
00:09:29,900 --> 00:09:31,960
一切都不顺利

269
00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:37,830
Wuntch 在我身边阴魂不散

270
00:09:37,830 --> 00:09:41,510
特遣队 成了拖累我事业的一块泥潭

271
00:09:41,510 --> 00:09:42,970
内务调查

272
00:09:42,980 --> 00:09:44,780
质疑了我的公正无私

273
00:09:44,780 --> 00:09:47,510
而你却问我 "一切顺利吗"

274
00:09:47,510 --> 00:09:50,380
我与敌人的恶意艰苦搏斗

275
00:09:50,380 --> 00:09:55,190
被残酷命运的怒潮所席卷

276
00:09:55,190 --> 00:09:57,120
我 作为警监

277
00:09:57,120 --> 00:09:59,580
不能再指挥我的片区

278
00:09:59,590 --> 00:10:02,030
不能再在我的办公室掌舵

279
00:10:02,030 --> 00:10:04,420
而你却问我 "一切顺利吗"

280
00:10:04,420 --> 00:10:06,530
我将我此生最美好的年华用于

281
00:10:06,530 --> 00:10:08,000
打破一切偏见

282
00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:10,070
争取到我现有的位置

283
00:10:10,070 --> 00:10:13,970
但它们却正在被无情夺走

284
00:10:13,970 --> 00:10:21,480
同去的 还有我作为男人的尊严

285
00:10:22,550 --> 00:10:27,440
而你却问我 "一切顺利吗"

286
00:10:29,690 --> 00:10:32,450
好吧 我明白了

287
00:10:32,450 --> 00:10:35,090
我家的狗占领了我最喜欢的椅子

288
00:10:35,090 --> 00:10:38,230
我就在想 怎么什么都留不住呢

289
00:10:40,570 --> 00:10:41,820
先生们

290
00:10:43,500 --> 00:10:45,770
该死的 Charles 这是个危机

291
00:10:45,770 --> 00:10:47,920
第一步 断绝往来

292
00:10:47,930 --> 00:10:50,010
我们之间不能再有任何接触

293
00:10:50,010 --> 00:10:52,050
早知道这是我们的最后一炮

294
00:10:52,060 --> 00:10:53,710
我就多叫几声了

295
00:10:53,710 --> 00:10:56,010
第二步 信息隔离

296
00:10:56,020 --> 00:10:59,080
不能再让别人发现

297
00:10:59,080 --> 00:11:01,520
我让Jake不告诉别人 他会听我的

298
00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:03,350
他我来办 你负责Amy

299
00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:05,320
但怎么让他们的死看起来像个意外

300
00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:06,390
我不是建议把他们做掉

301
00:11:06,390 --> 00:11:08,110
像正常人一样和她谈谈

302
00:11:08,190 --> 00:11:09,630
对 好主意

303
00:11:09,630 --> 00:11:11,200
把她的小秘密都套出来

304
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:14,490
她要是敢轻举妄动 哼 把她干掉

305
00:11:23,170 --> 00:11:24,210
你好 Peralta

306
00:11:24,210 --> 00:11:25,710
我的天呐 嗨

307
00:11:25,710 --> 00:11:26,810
你在这里干什么

308
00:11:26,810 --> 00:11:28,280
这说起来可有意思了

309
00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:31,870
前段时间 我明知不应该 但还是把这些文件带回了家

310
00:11:31,870 --> 00:11:34,120
现在 我把它们送了回来

311
00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:35,390
有意思吧

312
00:11:35,390 --> 00:11:37,820
你在口罩背后偷笑了吗

313
00:11:37,820 --> 00:11:39,350
没有

314
00:11:43,950 --> 00:11:44,950
Kev

315
00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:46,020
Jake 都大半夜了

316
00:11:46,020 --> 00:11:47,620
要不是有关谋杀就别进来了

317
00:11:47,620 --> 00:11:48,690
要是就好了

318
00:11:48,690 --> 00:11:49,860
我很抱歉

319
00:11:49,860 --> 00:11:51,360
但我必须和Holt警监谈谈

320
00:11:51,360 --> 00:11:53,260
Raymond 你的工作找上门了

321
00:11:53,260 --> 00:11:55,260
请进 进门请脱鞋

322
00:11:55,270 --> 00:11:56,740
脱了后果不堪设想

323
00:11:58,700 --> 00:12:00,410
你来干什么 Peralta

324
00:12:00,420 --> 00:12:02,170
我今天已经很烦了

325
00:12:02,170 --> 00:12:04,970
我送回文件的时候被内务局抓包了

326
00:12:04,980 --> 00:12:07,710
我成了这次调查的首要嫌疑人

327
00:12:07,710 --> 00:12:09,980
Miller说我明早就会被停职

328
00:12:09,980 --> 00:12:12,720
更重要的是 那个"J"是什么的缩写

329
00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:14,280
James吗 还是John

330
00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:15,720
难道是Jo-Jo

331
00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:16,990
我的中间名对你来说比

332
00:12:16,990 --> 00:12:18,220
被停职还重要吗

333
00:12:18,220 --> 00:12:19,800
如果是Jo-Jo的话 对

334
00:12:19,810 --> 00:12:22,530
听着 我来是因为有件事必须搞清楚

335
00:12:22,530 --> 00:12:24,590
Miller确定局里有个奸细

336
00:12:24,590 --> 00:12:26,200
唯一能证明我不是奸细的方法就是

337
00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:27,460
揪出真的奸细

338
00:12:27,460 --> 00:12:28,830
你说过没有奸细的啊

339
00:12:28,830 --> 00:12:30,730
你说你对他们了如指掌

340
00:12:30,730 --> 00:12:32,840
事实证明 我太天真了

341
00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:35,040
我在今晚发现了一些可怕的真相

342
00:12:35,040 --> 00:12:36,810
你是对的 我错了

343
00:12:36,810 --> 00:12:38,040
天呐

344
00:12:38,040 --> 00:12:39,380
Boyle和Gina搞在一起了吗

345
00:12:39,380 --> 00:12:41,680
什么 你怎么可能会知道

346
00:12:41,680 --> 00:12:43,350
"你是对的 我错了"

347
00:12:43,350 --> 00:12:44,880
你要不是三观尽毁

348
00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:45,920
绝对说不出这种话

349
00:12:45,920 --> 00:12:47,320
Boyle是你最好的朋友

350
00:12:47,320 --> 00:12:48,380
所以跟他肯定有关

351
00:12:48,390 --> 00:12:49,990
你用了"可怕"这个词

352
00:12:49,990 --> 00:12:52,320
让我相信这一定是床笫之事

353
00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:54,290
鉴于你的幼稚行径

354
00:12:54,290 --> 00:12:55,690
瞎说 我可不是处男

355
00:12:55,690 --> 00:12:57,880
当然了 如果这个对象还是你

356
00:12:57,880 --> 00:13:00,230
从小就认识的人 你一定最崩溃

357
00:13:00,230 --> 00:13:03,930
因此 答案就是 Gina和Charles

358
00:13:03,930 --> 00:13:05,390
你太有才了

359
00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:06,900
跟我去书房

360
00:13:06,900 --> 00:13:08,840
让我们揪出奸细

361
00:13:08,840 --> 00:13:11,070
我把所有的猪咯咯都吃了

362
00:13:11,070 --> 00:13:12,980
你要想亲嘴的话

363
00:13:12,980 --> 00:13:14,210
我嘴里还剩一些

364
00:13:14,210 --> 00:13:15,400
好主意

365
00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:17,850
等我嗑嗨了 一定和你好好亲热一番

366
00:13:17,850 --> 00:13:19,480
哪能搞到猪咯咯

367
00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:21,160
那边那个女孩卖给我的

368
00:13:21,690 --> 00:13:23,050
怎么回事 Ava

369
00:13:23,050 --> 00:13:25,250
你不是说你不嗑药不喝酒吗

370
00:13:25,260 --> 00:13:26,820
我确实没有 你知道卖药中间

371
00:13:26,820 --> 00:13:28,390
牵扯到多少数学问题吗

372
00:13:28,390 --> 00:13:29,730
头脑清醒才能干

373
00:13:29,730 --> 00:13:31,710
听好了 坦白从宽

374
00:13:31,710 --> 00:13:33,230
只要把你上家的名字交出来

375
00:13:33,230 --> 00:13:34,760
你怎么走上卖猪咯咯这条路的

376
00:13:34,760 --> 00:13:37,430
先别着急 我们从头开始回忆

377
00:13:37,430 --> 00:13:40,640
学前班之后 你上的是私立小学还是公立小学

378
00:13:40,640 --> 00:13:41,580
私立的

379
00:13:41,580 --> 00:13:43,440
- 你几岁学会自己上厕所的  - 这什么奇怪的问题

380
00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:45,720
警长 关注猪咯咯的事

381
00:13:45,730 --> 00:13:47,910
好了 我们把大家逐个分析一遍

382
00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:49,250
Rosa很神秘

383
00:13:49,250 --> 00:13:51,380
我对她的私生活一无所知

384
00:13:51,380 --> 00:13:53,520
Charles品味不低

385
00:13:53,530 --> 00:13:56,020
Gina说过很多次 她能把我们全都卖了

386
00:13:56,020 --> 00:13:57,690
只要能和Blake Griffin共度五分钟

387
00:13:57,690 --> 00:14:00,610
Terry想把他家双胞胎送去私立学校

388
00:14:00,610 --> 00:14:02,290
但是以他的薪水这很困难

389
00:14:02,290 --> 00:14:03,830
而且双胞胎嘛

390
00:14:03,830 --> 00:14:07,060
其中一个一定是小魔头

391
00:14:07,060 --> 00:14:08,160
肯定是Cagney

392
00:14:09,250 --> 00:14:11,630
Gina 怎么回事

393
00:14:11,640 --> 00:14:12,870
你从来不给我发短信

394
00:14:12,870 --> 00:14:15,880
你看 我上次收到你的短信是2009年8月3日

395
00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:17,770
你发的是 "嘿 Rosa"

396
00:14:17,770 --> 00:14:19,420
下一条是"发错人了"

397
00:14:19,430 --> 00:14:21,310
我和Charles分手了

398
00:14:21,310 --> 00:14:22,630
我好伤心

399
00:14:22,640 --> 00:14:26,220
Amy 我什么时候才能找到像你和

400
00:14:26,220 --> 00:14:28,020
Freddy那样完美的恋情呢

401
00:14:28,020 --> 00:14:30,120
是Teddy 而且我们的恋情不完美

402
00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:31,590
相信我

403
00:14:31,590 --> 00:14:34,180
他所有内裤都和泳衣一样有内衬网

404
00:14:34,180 --> 00:14:35,160
那是医用的吗

405
00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:36,360
你怎么问得出口啊

406
00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:38,480
我不知道 但接着说

407
00:14:38,490 --> 00:14:41,200
还有什么 还有什么 还有什么

408
00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:43,330
等一下

409
00:14:43,330 --> 00:14:45,660
有一次 我看见Rosa在吃西瓜

410
00:14:45,660 --> 00:14:47,540
但后来 当我问起她的时候

411
00:14:47,540 --> 00:14:51,010
她说他从来没吃过西瓜或者任何其他瓜

412
00:14:51,010 --> 00:14:52,800
现在我说出来了 感觉又不是那么一回事

413
00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:54,440
不 写板子上

414
00:14:55,780 --> 00:14:58,050
嘿 看这个

415
00:14:58,050 --> 00:15:03,220
狗狗胸罩

416
00:15:03,220 --> 00:15:06,120
我好累 我眼睛都睁不开了

417
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:08,390
来 扇我一巴掌

418
00:15:08,390 --> 00:15:10,230
我不会那么做的 Peralta

419
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:15,560
我想或许出其不意会更有效果

420
00:15:15,570 --> 00:15:17,030
确实

421
00:15:17,030 --> 00:15:19,970
不敢相信我们竟找不出奸细是谁

422
00:15:19,970 --> 00:15:23,010
还是有个人我们没有讨论过

423
00:15:23,010 --> 00:15:24,570
Jake Peralta警探

424
00:15:24,570 --> 00:15:26,240
什么

425
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,810
有人开始开过夜派对玩笑了

426
00:15:28,810 --> 00:15:30,080
我怎么会是奸细

427
00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:33,520
你刚被抓住偷渡机密文件进警局

428
00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:36,420
过去六个月你都在黑手党当卧底

429
00:15:36,420 --> 00:15:38,450
而且认识不少罪犯

430
00:15:38,460 --> 00:15:41,140
你出了名的蔑视部门规定和纪律

431
00:15:41,140 --> 00:15:43,130
而且你还欠了一屁股债

432
00:15:43,140 --> 00:15:47,560
如果不是你骗我上车险的话

433
00:15:47,560 --> 00:15:49,430
我就不会欠债了

434
00:15:49,430 --> 00:15:51,830
你想说我是吗 那我也来说说你

435
00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:53,240
以牙还牙

436
00:15:53,240 --> 00:15:54,800
我当了三十年的警察

437
00:15:54,810 --> 00:15:56,540
而且我从没因不正当行为被指责过

438
00:15:56,540 --> 00:15:57,970
哦 是这样吗

439
00:15:57,970 --> 00:16:00,600
因为我听到你直呼副局长Wuntch的名字

440
00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:01,600
而且在那之后

441
00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:03,480
你告诉她你希望她被乌鸦带走

442
00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:05,260
这明显是不尊重上级

443
00:16:05,260 --> 00:16:06,950
Madeline和这些无关

444
00:16:06,950 --> 00:16:10,650
我们的战争已经延伸到纽约警署的规章之外了

445
00:16:10,650 --> 00:16:11,820
你在胡说八道

446
00:16:11,820 --> 00:16:13,670
是吗 如果你真是个这么好的警察

447
00:16:13,670 --> 00:16:15,380
你怎么会不知道自己的警局里有奸细

448
00:16:15,380 --> 00:16:17,160
没错 你是知道的

449
00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:18,750
因为你就是奸细 你这奸细

450
00:16:18,750 --> 00:16:19,900
我听够了

451
00:16:19,900 --> 00:16:22,030
请归还你的客用睡衣

452
00:16:22,030 --> 00:16:23,840
客用牙刷以及客用拖鞋

453
00:16:23,840 --> 00:16:25,770
然后离开

454
00:16:25,770 --> 00:16:28,180
到了你被停职的时候了

455
00:16:32,190 --> 00:16:33,930
Peralta 你不是被停职了吗

456
00:16:33,930 --> 00:16:36,030
是的 我知道你不乐意看到我在这里

457
00:16:36,030 --> 00:16:37,600
但马上你就会改变心意了

458
00:16:37,600 --> 00:16:39,330
因为我知道谁是奸细了

459
00:16:39,330 --> 00:16:40,770
Miller警督

460
00:16:40,770 --> 00:16:42,870
我觉得他根本不是内务局的

461
00:16:42,870 --> 00:16:44,570
我觉得他是Wuntch派来的间谍

462
00:16:44,570 --> 00:16:46,370
- Wuntch  - 你自己说过

463
00:16:46,370 --> 00:16:49,380
你们的战争已经延伸到纽约警署的规章之外了

464
00:16:49,380 --> 00:16:51,270
她想要你的特遣队的讯息

465
00:16:51,270 --> 00:16:54,310
但她得不到 所以她派了个间谍来

466
00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:56,680
所以Miller才能在本该只有

467
00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:58,520
我能鬼鬼祟祟的档案室里出现

468
00:16:58,520 --> 00:17:00,070
有意思 我确实在他刚见Wuntch的时候

469
00:17:00,070 --> 00:17:02,920
注意到了一些奇怪的事情 她只是点了点头

470
00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:04,760
连尝试着握手都没有

471
00:17:07,930 --> 00:17:11,150
她已经知道他有洁癖了

472
00:17:11,150 --> 00:17:12,860
因为他们早就认识了

473
00:17:12,860 --> 00:17:13,370
对

474
00:17:13,370 --> 00:17:15,370
不幸的是我们没有任何证据

475
00:17:15,370 --> 00:17:16,740
能证明他们是一伙的

476
00:17:16,740 --> 00:17:21,770
算你走运 证据就是我的中间名

477
00:17:21,780 --> 00:17:24,110
而你的是Jared

478
00:17:24,110 --> 00:17:25,110
Juice box(果汁盒)

479
00:17:25,110 --> 00:17:26,150
Jellyfish(水母)

480
00:17:26,150 --> 00:17:28,110
Jamiroquai

481
00:17:30,380 --> 00:17:32,050
Miller警督

482
00:17:32,050 --> 00:17:33,290
你想干什么 Peralta

483
00:17:33,290 --> 00:17:34,580
我想要合作

484
00:17:34,580 --> 00:17:36,590
你为我正名 我会给你关于

485
00:17:36,590 --> 00:17:37,860
Holt警监的讯息

486
00:17:37,860 --> 00:17:40,290
我有兴趣 什么样的讯息

487
00:17:40,830 --> 00:17:42,830
全都在这上面

488
00:17:42,830 --> 00:17:44,160
很屌的U盘 对吧

489
00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:46,130
这是一个枪形的USB

490
00:17:46,130 --> 00:17:47,430
噔噔 拿着

491
00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:51,170
好了 我会把这个交给我的上司

492
00:17:51,170 --> 00:17:52,670
并且跟你保持联系

493
00:17:52,670 --> 00:17:55,590
我知道你昨晚找我出去只是为了

494
00:17:55,590 --> 00:17:56,940
找出我不可告人的秘密

495
00:17:56,940 --> 00:17:58,850
什么 才不是

496
00:17:58,860 --> 00:18:02,440
听着 你不需要担心

497
00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:05,320
我永远不会把你和Charles的事情告诉别人

498
00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:07,990
但说实话 这没有你想的那么丢人

499
00:18:07,990 --> 00:18:12,890
刚开始确实吓到了 但我缓过来后觉得也挺正常的

500
00:18:12,890 --> 00:18:16,060
除了看到Charles空无一毛的腿

501
00:18:16,060 --> 00:18:17,660
他有在刮腿毛吗

502
00:18:17,670 --> 00:18:19,370
没有 他穿很便宜的裤子

503
00:18:19,370 --> 00:18:22,470
根据我的观察 腿毛应该是被摩擦掉了

504
00:18:22,470 --> 00:18:23,470
恶心啊

505
00:18:23,470 --> 00:18:24,770
想象一下他们环住你的样子

506
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:25,770
够了

507
00:18:26,750 --> 00:18:29,610
好了 我可能会因此惹上大麻烦

508
00:18:29,610 --> 00:18:33,210
但Holt警监的大秘密就是

509
00:18:33,210 --> 00:18:36,550
我有上演反转剧的天赋

510
00:18:36,550 --> 00:18:38,140
看你身后 Madeline

511
00:18:41,190 --> 00:18:42,960
我们其实在你们前面

512
00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:45,230
我的错 我以为场景布置会不一样

513
00:18:45,230 --> 00:18:46,230
我不知道你们会坐哪里

514
00:18:46,230 --> 00:18:47,260
就猜了一下

515
00:18:47,260 --> 00:18:49,040
Miller可能真的是内务局人

516
00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:50,630
但他不是来办公的

517
00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:52,330
你派他来当间谍

518
00:18:52,330 --> 00:18:54,900
严重违背了道德标准啊 Madeline

519
00:18:54,900 --> 00:18:56,400
这可是能把你拖下水啊

520
00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:58,790
好吧 你说得对 但你没有证据

521
00:18:58,870 --> 00:19:00,810
这是你的一面之词

522
00:19:00,810 --> 00:19:04,640
实际上 这是你的一面之词

523
00:19:04,650 --> 00:19:05,880
不好意思啊

524
00:19:05,880 --> 00:19:08,380
我在这个酷酷的U盘上放了录音设备

525
00:19:08,380 --> 00:19:10,420
所以你们全部对话都被录下来了

526
00:19:10,420 --> 00:19:11,580
不要再打我的片区

527
00:19:11,590 --> 00:19:13,150
以及我的特遣队的主意

528
00:19:13,150 --> 00:19:14,520
不然的话

529
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,260
你就会变成

530
00:19:16,260 --> 00:19:18,590
砧板上的Wuntch肉

531
00:19:18,590 --> 00:19:20,130
你确定要这么说吗

532
00:19:20,130 --> 00:19:21,190
当然 这超好笑的

533
00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:22,430
好吧

534
00:19:22,430 --> 00:19:23,460
嘿

535
00:19:23,460 --> 00:19:25,160
昨晚我很抱歉

536
00:19:25,170 --> 00:19:27,200
我让私人情感影响了工作

537
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:27,710
没关系

538
00:19:27,710 --> 00:19:29,270
不 有关系

539
00:19:29,270 --> 00:19:31,470
今天早上 我认真做了些调查工作

540
00:19:31,470 --> 00:19:33,070
我给"学林"打电话了

541
00:19:33,070 --> 00:19:34,810
他们不认识什么Ava Watson

542
00:19:34,810 --> 00:19:36,310
所以我给他们传了照片

543
00:19:36,310 --> 00:19:38,910
他们认出来她叫Rebecca Lubbock

544
00:19:38,910 --> 00:19:41,580
我调出了她的通话记录

545
00:19:41,580 --> 00:19:44,120
我想我们找到了些潜在毒枭的线索了

546
00:19:44,120 --> 00:19:45,710
哇哦 干得好

547
00:19:45,790 --> 00:19:48,590
还有 你不需要担心你的孩子们

548
00:19:48,590 --> 00:19:50,420
你是我见过最好的父亲了

549
00:19:50,420 --> 00:19:51,990
Cagney和Lacey会成为很棒的人的

550
00:19:51,990 --> 00:19:53,730
- 你真的这么认为吗  - 百分之百

551
00:19:53,730 --> 00:19:54,830
你说得对

552
00:19:54,830 --> 00:19:56,930
她们会成为双胞胎总统

553
00:19:56,930 --> 00:19:59,010
要么蒙骗大众 以一人的名义轮流来当

554
00:19:59,010 --> 00:20:03,200
要么以两人名义连任16年

555
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:05,640
简直就是个王朝

556
00:20:05,650 --> 00:20:07,440
不好意思 我有件事情要公布

557
00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,140
所有人麻烦注意过来

558
00:20:10,140 --> 00:20:12,150
Charles Boyle和我上床了

559
00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:13,510
怎么回事

560
00:20:13,510 --> 00:20:15,240
Gina 你在做什么

561
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:15,970
Amy说得对

562
00:20:15,970 --> 00:20:17,630
人们会被吓到 但他们会习惯的

563
00:20:17,630 --> 00:20:18,950
然后我们就能继续生活了

564
00:20:18,960 --> 00:20:21,590
至少这样一来 我可以控制大家是怎么知道的

565
00:20:21,590 --> 00:20:23,720
我要像Olivia Pope一样捅破这层窗户纸

566
00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:25,290
首先 我想跟你们科普一下

567
00:20:25,290 --> 00:20:28,130
我值得提及的前任们

568
00:20:28,130 --> 00:20:29,670
攀岩背包客

569
00:20:29,670 --> 00:20:31,100
内衣模特

570
00:20:31,100 --> 00:20:33,030
长得像Tywin Lannister的男人

571
00:20:33,030 --> 00:20:34,100
我提起这些男人

572
00:20:34,100 --> 00:20:35,900
好让你们知道这场厮混

573
00:20:35,900 --> 00:20:38,270
就是一次 例外

574
00:20:38,270 --> 00:20:39,770
我现在可以回答问题了

575
00:20:39,770 --> 00:20:40,970
上床的感觉如何

576
00:20:40,980 --> 00:20:42,040
恶心

577
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:43,510
你是说上床恶心还是我恶心

578
00:20:43,510 --> 00:20:45,510
你恶心 房事还是不错的

579
00:20:45,510 --> 00:20:46,910
你们做了多少次了

580
00:20:46,910 --> 00:20:48,050
十六又三分之一次

581
00:20:48,050 --> 00:20:49,680
别问我 没法解释

582
00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:51,520
我有个问题

583
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:53,750
你后悔过吗

584
00:20:53,750 --> 00:20:56,190
没有 其实还挺有趣的

585
00:20:59,490 --> 00:21:01,450
谢谢你们的出席

586
00:21:01,460 --> 00:21:03,800
嘿 我昨晚就该说了

587
00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:06,770
第一次的炮友恋情啊 干得漂亮

588
00:21:06,770 --> 00:21:07,520
我也觉得

589
00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:09,740
我可一次都没有向她求婚呢

590
00:21:09,740 --> 00:21:11,840
Jake 很抱歉我骗了你

591
00:21:11,840 --> 00:21:13,110
我真的很想告诉你

592
00:21:13,110 --> 00:21:15,040
但我向Gina保证过我不会告诉任何人

593
00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:16,580
坚守对朋友的承诺

594
00:21:16,580 --> 00:21:18,480
听起来就是我所了解的Charles

595
00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:21,150
正如我了解这儿的所有人一样

596
00:21:21,150 --> 00:21:23,520
是的 不过还是有些

597
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:25,920
关于我的事情你不知道

598
00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:27,950
我的中间名

599
00:21:27,950 --> 00:21:30,160
是Jacob

600
00:21:30,160 --> 00:21:31,780
什么