1
00:00:01,650 --> 00:00:04,240
所以3个月来已经有20艘货船了

2
00:00:04,270 --> 00:00:05,800
不管这个走私集团的幕后黑手是谁

3
00:00:05,810 --> 00:00:07,140
那人一定对码头很熟悉

4
00:00:07,140 --> 00:00:08,970
所以我们要扮成码头工人去卧底

5
00:00:09,010 --> 00:00:10,980
我将会是Vaughn Tom Tucker

6
00:00:11,010 --> 00:00:13,340
一个粗鲁 随地吐口水 崇尚暴力的水手

7
00:00:13,350 --> 00:00:14,950
刚好在陆地上休假

8
00:00:14,950 --> 00:00:17,920
等我的女朋友Cangela出狱

9
00:00:20,950 --> 00:00:23,620
你刚才是朝我的垃圾桶里吐口水了吗

10
00:00:23,660 --> 00:00:24,720
不是我 是Vaughn吐的

11
00:00:24,720 --> 00:00:26,120
口水里有些烟叶

12
00:00:26,130 --> 00:00:28,990
Vaghn喜欢嚼烟叶 但弄得Jake头超晕

13
00:00:28,990 --> 00:00:30,380
而我是Twink Tuker(青年基佬)

14
00:00:30,380 --> 00:00:31,760
你不准再给自己取名字了

15
00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:34,310
我在码头找了份工作来维持我的毒瘾

16
00:00:34,310 --> 00:00:35,070
但我继续干了下去

17
00:00:35,070 --> 00:00:36,840
因为我可中意那些海鸥了

18
00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:38,540
什么 你现在变成爱尔兰人了吗 不

19
00:00:38,540 --> 00:00:39,970
我们得走啦 警监

20
00:00:39,970 --> 00:00:41,730
可不想在码头上工迟到呢

21
00:00:42,010 --> 00:00:43,110
好消息

22
00:00:43,110 --> 00:00:44,580
货物走私集团首领

23
00:00:44,580 --> 00:00:46,110
在83片区自首了

24
00:00:46,150 --> 00:00:47,870
黑手党在追杀他

25
00:00:48,950 --> 00:00:50,280
噢

26
00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:51,650
那太好了

27
00:00:51,650 --> 00:00:53,150
- 是个好消息  - 是啊

28
00:00:53,190 --> 00:00:54,190
结案了

29
00:00:54,190 --> 00:00:57,020
我想我们可以去还掉这些衣服了

30
00:00:57,060 --> 00:00:58,620
太好了 把这拿回去

31
00:00:58,620 --> 00:00:59,620
你们还有十分钟

32
00:01:00,860 --> 00:01:03,930
咖啡 纯黑咖 不含糖 要热的

33
00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:05,300
码头冷起来了

34
00:01:05,300 --> 00:01:08,000
还有一杯英国伯爵 给Twink Tucker

35
00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:08,990
不 乐趣被你毁了

36
00:01:09,030 --> 00:01:10,490
神烦警探 第二季 第九集

37
00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:30,660
警探们 早上好

38
00:01:30,660 --> 00:01:32,420
汇报一下犯人转移的最新情况吧

39
00:01:32,460 --> 00:01:33,990
罪犯的名字叫Jesse Hermick

40
00:01:33,990 --> 00:01:36,360
逮捕原因是九次持械抢劫

41
00:01:36,360 --> 00:01:37,530
但后来他弃保潜逃

42
00:01:37,530 --> 00:01:39,330
他在纽约的纽伦堡被抓到的时候

43
00:01:39,330 --> 00:01:41,200
正打算用枪交换一个三明治

44
00:01:41,230 --> 00:01:44,760
当地警长让我们明天早晨6点半去接他

45
00:01:44,760 --> 00:01:47,040
所以我们打算今天去 然后在那儿住一晚

46
00:01:47,070 --> 00:01:48,610
这是转监表 千万别

47
00:01:48,610 --> 00:01:49,610
让Jake碰到吗

48
00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:50,890
我会把它放进密封袋的

49
00:01:50,910 --> 00:01:52,080
好主意

50
00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:54,050
今天我带的所有饮料都是蓝色的

51
00:01:54,050 --> 00:01:55,810
那是自然

52
00:01:55,820 --> 00:01:57,020
有事就打电话给我

53
00:01:57,050 --> 00:01:58,380
好的 没问题

54
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,950
对了 希望你不要介意

55
00:02:01,950 --> 00:02:04,520
既然明早之前我们严格意义上不算在执行任务

56
00:02:04,520 --> 00:02:06,730
我邀请了Sophia同行

57
00:02:06,730 --> 00:02:08,430
我们订的那间小旅馆看上去很不错

58
00:02:08,430 --> 00:02:11,200
看起来像闹了很酷的鬼

59
00:02:11,230 --> 00:02:12,230
我一点都不介意

60
00:02:12,230 --> 00:02:14,470
其实你这样做还蛮暖的

61
00:02:14,470 --> 00:02:18,600
Teddy从来不做一些随意又浪漫的事

62
00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:19,640
这样说不太公平

63
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:22,470
他确实给我酿过加玫瑰的皮尔森啤酒

64
00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:25,710
但尝起来就像护手霜一样 而且没有气泡

65
00:02:25,710 --> 00:02:26,810
听起来好恶心

66
00:02:26,810 --> 00:02:28,010
好吧 车上见

67
00:02:28,010 --> 00:02:29,300
好 马上来

68
00:02:36,790 --> 00:02:39,590
喂 能让Teddy Wells警探接一下电话吗

69
00:02:39,590 --> 00:02:41,870
你可以告诉他是丘比特打来的

70
00:02:41,870 --> 00:02:42,990
等下 算了吧 好傻

71
00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:45,150
告诉他是99区的Peralta警探打来的

72
00:02:45,160 --> 00:02:46,360
你好 Boyle

73
00:02:46,370 --> 00:02:48,400
你办完手上的事之后 来我办公室一下

74
00:02:48,400 --> 00:02:49,800
我有点事想问你

75
00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:51,690
是跟食物有关的

76
00:02:52,410 --> 00:02:54,070
我会全力以赴的

77
00:02:54,070 --> 00:02:55,570
我天啊 Gina

78
00:02:55,570 --> 00:02:57,480
警监刚刚请我去他办公室

79
00:02:57,480 --> 00:02:59,080
要问我跟食物有关的问题

80
00:02:59,110 --> 00:03:00,010
我听见了

81
00:03:00,010 --> 00:03:01,610
所以我确定 我一点也不关心

82
00:03:01,650 --> 00:03:03,790
我从他一调过来就想跟他搞好关系

83
00:03:03,790 --> 00:03:04,820
但直到现在

84
00:03:04,820 --> 00:03:06,690
我们唯一的共同点是在同一间银行开的户

85
00:03:08,150 --> 00:03:09,150
猜猜我是谁

86
00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:10,420
纽约警察 举起手来

87
00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:12,790
这太棒了

88
00:03:12,790 --> 00:03:15,890
我不知道警监对食物这么感兴趣

89
00:03:15,930 --> 00:03:17,640
我对食物一点都不感兴趣

90
00:03:17,660 --> 00:03:20,430
如果可以的话 我只会吃

91
00:03:20,430 --> 00:03:22,830
没味道的米黄色奶昔

92
00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:26,140
它包含了所有人类所需的营养

93
00:03:27,410 --> 00:03:29,640
那啥 咱们那间银行新建了些自动取款机 对吧

94
00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:31,120
不知道 我换了银行

95
00:03:31,140 --> 00:03:31,880
完了

96
00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:35,550
明天是我跟Kevin的结婚纪念日

97
00:03:35,580 --> 00:03:38,150
我想给他做顿印象深刻的早餐

98
00:03:38,150 --> 00:03:40,790
你能帮我吗

99
00:03:40,820 --> 00:03:42,020
这是我的荣幸

100
00:03:42,020 --> 00:03:43,460
为爱人准备食物

101
00:03:43,460 --> 00:03:46,690
是最亲密的礼物

102
00:03:46,690 --> 00:03:48,390
除了帮他们洗头以外

103
00:03:49,710 --> 00:03:52,130
好了

104
00:03:52,130 --> 00:03:53,630
审讯室里有个犯人我要审

105
00:03:53,630 --> 00:03:54,800
我要所有的文件

106
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:55,770
等一下 等一下 等一下

107
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,270
Diaz 你怎么了

108
00:03:57,270 --> 00:03:59,100
你病了吗 是不是感染了霍乱

109
00:03:59,110 --> 00:04:00,910
还是伤寒

110
00:04:00,940 --> 00:04:02,270
你是不是变成吸血鬼了

111
00:04:02,310 --> 00:04:05,540
我的星运上说今天要穿上大翻领的衣服 我还呵呵了

112
00:04:05,580 --> 00:04:06,610
我没事

113
00:04:06,610 --> 00:04:09,080
Diaze家的人不会生病

114
00:04:11,680 --> 00:04:12,820
我只是过敏而已

115
00:04:12,850 --> 00:04:15,090
不行 恐龙就是因为这个灭绝的

116
00:04:15,090 --> 00:04:16,090
你得回家休息

117
00:04:16,120 --> 00:04:18,090
不行 我的毒品特案组需要一场胜利

118
00:04:18,090 --> 00:04:20,260
那个犯人手上有猪咯咯供货人的名字

119
00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,460
我拿到名字才能走

120
00:04:23,500 --> 00:04:25,500
起码让我买点面包球汤给你

121
00:04:25,500 --> 00:04:26,800
会缓解病情的

122
00:04:26,830 --> 00:04:27,870
这样吧

123
00:04:27,900 --> 00:04:30,340
我反正都要去熟食店一趟

124
00:04:30,340 --> 00:04:32,000
我超喜欢吃三角馄饨

125
00:04:33,410 --> 00:04:34,410
嗨 Sophia

126
00:04:34,410 --> 00:04:35,470
嘿

127
00:04:35,510 --> 00:04:36,360
你们来啦

128
00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:37,940
嘿 嘿

129
00:04:37,940 --> 00:04:38,940
么么哒

130
00:04:38,950 --> 00:04:40,080
我已经办好入住手续了

131
00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:41,550
我希望你不介意 我给咱们订了个

132
00:04:41,550 --> 00:04:43,350
"一千只娃娃"的房间

133
00:04:43,380 --> 00:04:44,750
哦 听上去好毛骨悚然

134
00:04:44,780 --> 00:04:46,320
超级毛骨悚然

135
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:50,120
我一会儿上去把行李拿出来 然后洗个澡

136
00:04:50,120 --> 00:04:52,520
再然后我们去吃晚饭 再再然后

137
00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:53,690
就开搞

138
00:04:53,730 --> 00:04:55,290
我本来打算说 吃甜品

139
00:04:55,330 --> 00:04:56,700
喔 同义词 不错 更好

140
00:04:56,730 --> 00:04:58,200
Amy 一会儿再见

141
00:04:58,200 --> 00:04:59,360
好 一会儿见

142
00:04:59,370 --> 00:05:01,900
对了

143
00:05:01,900 --> 00:05:03,600
尽量在半小时之后到大堂来

144
00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,000
我给你准备了一个小惊喜

145
00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:06,040
不要

146
00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:07,510
你的惊喜通常都很可怕

147
00:05:07,510 --> 00:05:08,910
发生了什么 告诉我

148
00:05:08,940 --> 00:05:10,340
你会很喜欢的

149
00:05:10,340 --> 00:05:12,640
你记得你之前说Teddy从来不会做浪漫的事

150
00:05:12,650 --> 00:05:14,610
比如把因公去上州出差

151
00:05:14,610 --> 00:05:16,510
变成情侣去郊外的一次静养吗

152
00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:17,550
不

153
00:05:17,550 --> 00:05:18,550
没错

154
00:05:18,550 --> 00:05:19,650
我们出发之前我打了电话给他

155
00:05:19,650 --> 00:05:21,120
他正在过来的路上

156
00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:23,020
不用谢哥

157
00:05:23,060 --> 00:05:26,760
Jake 我现在不想见Teddy

158
00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:28,190
我打算跟他分手

159
00:05:28,230 --> 00:05:29,430
哦

160
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:35,280
不不不不

161
00:05:40,050 --> 00:05:41,840
Jake 你为什么要把Teddy邀请过来

162
00:05:41,840 --> 00:05:43,590
你用蓝色汽水污染我的人生

163
00:05:43,620 --> 00:05:45,190
我知道 对不起 好不

164
00:05:45,190 --> 00:05:46,320
我只是想帮忙而已

165
00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:48,460
两杯枫叶马提尼

166
00:05:48,490 --> 00:05:49,760
你瞧瞧

167
00:05:49,790 --> 00:05:51,090
那是真的枫糖浆吗

168
00:05:52,100 --> 00:05:53,230
哦 对不起

169
00:05:53,260 --> 00:05:54,960
手头上的问题比较严重

170
00:05:54,970 --> 00:05:56,570
你们俩之间发生了什么

171
00:05:56,600 --> 00:05:57,700
我以为你们感情很好

172
00:05:57,700 --> 00:05:59,300
你们不是开了张共同的借书卡吗

173
00:05:59,340 --> 00:06:00,340
别提了

174
00:06:00,340 --> 00:06:02,400
要跟他分清这事得一个月

175
00:06:03,340 --> 00:06:06,180
我们之间不再有火花了

176
00:06:06,180 --> 00:06:07,580
我们的爱好不同

177
00:06:07,580 --> 00:06:08,980
他有空的时候 只想

178
00:06:08,980 --> 00:06:10,680
自制皮尔森啤酒

179
00:06:10,720 --> 00:06:12,750
是啊 那家伙对酵母菌着迷了

180
00:06:12,750 --> 00:06:14,480
我们整天只聊这个

181
00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:16,550
Jake 这下糟糕了

182
00:06:16,590 --> 00:06:18,290
没事的 好吗 我会想办法的

183
00:06:18,290 --> 00:06:19,290
我这就给Teddy打电话

184
00:06:19,290 --> 00:06:20,690
让他转头回家

185
00:06:20,690 --> 00:06:22,260
不行 他是个很厉害的警探

186
00:06:22,260 --> 00:06:23,690
他会察觉到哪里不对劲的

187
00:06:23,730 --> 00:06:26,230
我本来有个严密的分手计划

188
00:06:26,230 --> 00:06:27,730
我在市中心一间光线良好的韩国餐厅

189
00:06:27,730 --> 00:06:30,300
预约了一个下周四的位置

190
00:06:30,300 --> 00:06:32,100
这是我能想象到的最不浪漫的地方

191
00:06:32,140 --> 00:06:33,340
那应该是Scully家的厕所 不过你继续

192
00:06:33,370 --> 00:06:34,640
Teddy是个好男人

193
00:06:34,670 --> 00:06:36,010
我不想说错一些话

194
00:06:36,010 --> 00:06:37,310
结果太多地伤害到他

195
00:06:37,340 --> 00:06:39,710
所以我已经开始写我的分手词了

196
00:06:39,710 --> 00:06:40,840
但现在他都快到了

197
00:06:40,850 --> 00:06:42,710
我大纲才写到一半

198
00:06:42,750 --> 00:06:44,410
好吧 听着 这都是我的错

199
00:06:44,420 --> 00:06:46,350
我会尽力帮助你 就像我答应你的那样

200
00:06:46,350 --> 00:06:48,990
今晚 我的注意力只会集中在你和Teddy上

201
00:06:49,990 --> 00:06:52,590
还有我裸着的女朋友

202
00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:57,230
Sophia完全不在意云端共享耶

203
00:06:59,260 --> 00:07:00,970
我要上去一小会儿

204
00:07:01,780 --> 00:07:02,410
嗨

205
00:07:02,410 --> 00:07:03,810
你对嫌犯做了些什么

206
00:07:03,810 --> 00:07:05,830
我听说他要控告警方暴力执法

207
00:07:05,830 --> 00:07:07,710
那货是个脑残 我都没碰他

208
00:07:07,710 --> 00:07:09,540
我就冲着他咳了几下

209
00:07:09,540 --> 00:07:10,710
还是让我来帮你吧

210
00:07:10,740 --> 00:07:12,140
我会让你那嫌犯开口的

211
00:07:12,180 --> 00:07:14,440
我的游说水平很高的

212
00:07:14,450 --> 00:07:18,060
我刚说服了闺女们买仓鼠而不是小马

213
00:07:18,060 --> 00:07:19,420
小傻瓜们

214
00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:22,490
我不需要你帮忙 我根本就没病

215
00:07:22,490 --> 00:07:24,990
Gina 感冒药哪儿去了

216
00:07:25,020 --> 00:07:26,820
非要逼我说出事实来吗

217
00:07:26,820 --> 00:07:29,330
你没有病为什么还要吃药呢

218
00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:35,230
为了除掉我这健康身体上的感冒症状

219
00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:44,010
一旦这玩意起了作用 我就要回去继续审问

220
00:07:45,580 --> 00:07:46,890
魔鬼

221
00:07:46,890 --> 00:07:48,980
好吧 如果她不愿意接受咱们的帮助

222
00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:50,280
咱就只好暗中(在背后)帮她了

223
00:07:50,310 --> 00:07:52,050
我们当然要待在她的背后

224
00:07:52,050 --> 00:07:55,120
那儿和细菌的运动方向正好相反

225
00:07:55,150 --> 00:07:58,200
咚咚咚 我可真是

226
00:07:58,200 --> 00:07:59,720
哇 洋娃娃 洋娃娃

227
00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:00,720
太多洋娃娃了啊

228
00:08:00,720 --> 00:08:01,470
我知道

229
00:08:01,470 --> 00:08:05,160
我以为会很有趣 但这真的只剩吓人了

230
00:08:05,160 --> 00:08:06,660
有一个还看着我洗澡

231
00:08:06,700 --> 00:08:08,670
没错 我们一定要把它们翻过去

232
00:08:08,670 --> 00:08:09,210
对

233
00:08:10,070 --> 00:08:13,700
哦不 它们的背上还写着自己的名字

234
00:08:13,700 --> 00:08:15,040
人家是Meredith

235
00:08:15,040 --> 00:08:16,610
你愿意当我的妈妈吗

236
00:08:17,610 --> 00:08:19,010
我的天哪

237
00:08:19,010 --> 00:08:20,040
哦 好吧 听着

238
00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:22,380
这些洋娃娃是很蛋疼 但只要咱们埋了它们

239
00:08:22,380 --> 00:08:24,110
这地方还能变得温馨浪漫起来

240
00:08:25,380 --> 00:08:27,480
没错 当然了 的确

241
00:08:27,490 --> 00:08:31,650
但更浪漫的是穿好衣服出去遛弯

242
00:08:31,660 --> 00:08:35,560
并且让两个坠出爱河的人陪着咱们

243
00:08:35,560 --> 00:08:36,560
你又干嘛了

244
00:08:36,560 --> 00:08:37,960
好吧 你别生气

245
00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,460
我请Teddy来给Amy一个惊喜

246
00:08:39,460 --> 00:08:41,350
但我才知道Amy想和Teddy分手

247
00:08:41,350 --> 00:08:43,730
于是我答应她在他们俩中间插一脚

248
00:08:43,770 --> 00:08:46,670
我感觉自己让你和你的小鬼娃们受了委屈

249
00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:47,900
喔 没关系的

250
00:08:47,910 --> 00:08:50,720
你只是想给好朋友一个惊喜

251
00:08:50,720 --> 00:08:52,240
结果就坏了事了

252
00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:54,040
还坏得异常惨烈

253
00:08:54,080 --> 00:08:56,300
哥干啥都轰轰烈烈 真是没办法

254
00:08:56,300 --> 00:08:57,740
谢谢你能理解我

255
00:08:57,740 --> 00:08:59,030
嗯 那你记着点

256
00:08:59,030 --> 00:09:01,470
- 我是个很赞的女朋友  - 最赞的

257
00:09:01,470 --> 00:09:03,570
说起来 Teddy赶过来还要半个多小时

258
00:09:03,570 --> 00:09:04,450
在那之前

259
00:09:04,450 --> 00:09:06,190
- 来一发咯  - 听起来很棒

260
00:09:09,760 --> 00:09:10,360
这个嘛

261
00:09:10,360 --> 00:09:11,730
那就躲在它们看不到的衣柜里吧

262
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:14,200
对 真机智

263
00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:15,670
玩偶啊啊啊

264
00:09:15,670 --> 00:09:17,670
衣柜里好多玩偶呀

265
00:09:18,500 --> 00:09:20,460
那么 学习下厨的第一步

266
00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:22,020
就是先学会品尝

267
00:09:22,020 --> 00:09:25,100
请你闭上眼 张开嘴

268
00:09:25,100 --> 00:09:27,760
这可不是火人节 Boyle

269
00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:28,670
快说我在吃的是什么

270
00:09:28,670 --> 00:09:30,550
好吧 这是块陈年佛蒙特卡伯奶酪

271
00:09:33,550 --> 00:09:35,160
来描述一下你尝到了什么

272
00:09:36,510 --> 00:09:37,070
奶酪

273
00:09:37,730 --> 00:09:39,300
还有呢

274
00:09:40,220 --> 00:09:40,850
奶酪

275
00:09:41,590 --> 00:09:42,830
好吧 很不错了

276
00:09:42,830 --> 00:09:44,570
试着更详细地描述一下

277
00:09:44,570 --> 00:09:48,050
我知道你喜欢花生酱果冻三明治

278
00:09:48,050 --> 00:09:49,800
但是为什么

279
00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:52,500
它的原料保质期长 性价比高

280
00:09:52,500 --> 00:09:55,810
而且容易制作到连小孩子都会

281
00:09:55,810 --> 00:09:58,880
好吧 但我是想寻求的是一种情感上的联系

282
00:09:58,910 --> 00:10:01,280
比如说 我最喜欢的菜

283
00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:04,010
就是简单的烤鸡配土豆

284
00:10:04,010 --> 00:10:06,380
那是我妈唯一会做的菜

285
00:10:06,380 --> 00:10:07,480
当我在吃它的时候

286
00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:11,300
我恍若重回她的子宫里一般

287
00:10:11,300 --> 00:10:14,210
你对花生果酱三明治有什么特别的情感吗

288
00:10:14,210 --> 00:10:15,420
我想吃个三明治

289
00:10:15,420 --> 00:10:16,500
我做了个三明治

290
00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:19,530
我吃了那三明治

291
00:10:20,690 --> 00:10:21,640
太菜了吧 Claire

292
00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:23,700
你就这水平还来混啥

293
00:10:23,730 --> 00:10:26,000
妈呀 Teddy人呢

294
00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,070
他在洗澡呢

295
00:10:27,070 --> 00:10:29,350
我跟他说你好 然后聊了大概一分钟

296
00:10:29,350 --> 00:10:30,480
然后我差点就搞砸了

297
00:10:30,480 --> 00:10:32,080
喔 你说得肯定有点夸张了

298
00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:34,660
他说他很期待有个浪漫的晚上

299
00:10:34,660 --> 00:10:36,870
我却吓得张口大喊"啊哈哈"

300
00:10:36,870 --> 00:10:38,170
- 噗嘿嘿  - 唉

301
00:10:38,170 --> 00:10:38,720
唉

302
00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:40,680
我会举止可疑 他会问为什么

303
00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:42,750
我们会分手 之后会超级混乱

304
00:10:42,750 --> 00:10:43,810
淡定

305
00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:45,190
我们帮你渡过难关 好不好

306
00:10:45,190 --> 00:10:45,700
计划如下

307
00:10:45,700 --> 00:10:48,800
咱们四个共进晚餐 一起尽毁浪漫氛围

308
00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:50,090
- 这是我的强项  - 的确是

309
00:10:50,090 --> 00:10:50,810
赞

310
00:10:51,680 --> 00:10:52,630
等等 我们应该为那种事击掌吗

311
00:10:52,630 --> 00:10:53,640
- 我不知道  - 随便吧

312
00:10:53,640 --> 00:10:56,030
喔对了 如果你觉得控制不住自己了

313
00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:58,970
就说"耶利哥"这个词 我就会使出浑身解数来帮你

314
00:10:58,970 --> 00:11:02,570
- 喔 耶利哥 这暗号真不错  - 对吧

315
00:11:02,610 --> 00:11:03,610
好的 那么晚饭之后

316
00:11:03,610 --> 00:11:05,710
你就装病 说自己得马上卧床休息

317
00:11:05,710 --> 00:11:07,830
明天一大早咱俩还得去接嫌犯

318
00:11:07,830 --> 00:11:09,500
所以你只要在从电梯走到房间的那段时间里

319
00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:10,700
在Teddy面前表现得正常就行

320
00:11:10,700 --> 00:11:12,210
你觉得自己能做到吗

321
00:11:12,210 --> 00:11:12,780
应该能吧

322
00:11:12,820 --> 00:11:15,150
你能 你得说"是的 我能做到 我能当个正常人"

323
00:11:15,150 --> 00:11:18,550
是的 我能做到 我能当个正常人

324
00:11:18,550 --> 00:11:19,190
这就好

325
00:11:19,190 --> 00:11:20,640
我完全能当个正常人的

326
00:11:20,660 --> 00:11:21,660
各位好啊

327
00:11:21,660 --> 00:11:22,660
他来咯

328
00:11:22,660 --> 00:11:25,530
Teddy大驾光临啦

329
00:11:28,910 --> 00:11:31,580
移送犯人居然也能放小假 真想不到

330
00:11:31,580 --> 00:11:32,390
嘿 伙计

331
00:11:32,390 --> 00:11:33,630
非常感谢你邀请我来

332
00:11:33,630 --> 00:11:35,830
没错 我真是个大好人

333
00:11:35,830 --> 00:11:37,490
这里真的非常浪漫

334
00:11:37,490 --> 00:11:38,430
嗯哼

335
00:11:38,430 --> 00:11:40,690
呃 其实没有那么浪漫啦

336
00:11:40,690 --> 00:11:43,380
我们那屋的暖气片听着像女人在嚎叫

337
00:11:43,380 --> 00:11:47,000
对 而且我们的卫生间里还有只死乌鸦

338
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,860
你们应该投诉一下

339
00:11:48,860 --> 00:11:50,710
我们那屋可温馨了 里面有个壁炉

340
00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:52,130
我真想和你依偎在炉边取暖

341
00:11:52,170 --> 00:11:53,300
不 我不想那么做

342
00:11:53,330 --> 00:11:55,670
因为那样容易得癌

343
00:11:55,700 --> 00:11:57,270
很多人都不知道这一点

344
00:11:57,300 --> 00:11:59,280
其实坐在火旁边对健康的危害远大于

345
00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:01,180
吸一辆公车的尾气管

346
00:12:01,180 --> 00:12:02,880
啊 因为细菌多呀

347
00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:03,810
是烟气多

348
00:12:04,210 --> 00:12:05,560
这样呀

349
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:07,620
我们刚开始约会的时候

350
00:12:07,620 --> 00:12:10,380
Amy和我在波科诺斯找到了一家不错的家庭旅馆

351
00:12:10,380 --> 00:12:12,050
还得到了划算的员工折扣价

352
00:12:12,050 --> 00:12:12,960
还记得吗 宝贝

353
00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:14,490
Teddy 别磨蹭了 快点饮料

354
00:12:14,520 --> 00:12:15,750
诶哟

355
00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:18,110
抱歉 不小心"碰"到你了

356
00:12:18,110 --> 00:12:19,990
我只是觉得你应该很想喝点啥

357
00:12:19,990 --> 00:12:21,280
我从来都不用看饮料单

358
00:12:21,280 --> 00:12:23,410
喝啤酒我只选皮尔森

359
00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:24,290
因为我最喜欢皮尔森啤酒

360
00:12:24,290 --> 00:12:25,610
- 喔 我不知道呢  - 这样啊

361
00:12:25,610 --> 00:12:27,070
够了

362
00:12:27,070 --> 00:12:28,860
我控制不住自己了

363
00:12:28,860 --> 00:12:30,130
耶利哥 耶利哥 耶利哥

364
00:12:31,030 --> 00:12:31,760
哎嘛

365
00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:33,480
这就是你浑身的解数吗

366
00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:35,150
怎么回事

367
00:12:35,150 --> 00:12:36,680
我想分了

368
00:12:36,680 --> 00:12:37,390
和你分了

369
00:12:37,390 --> 00:12:38,950
我想和你分了

370
00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:40,710
各位好呀

371
00:12:40,710 --> 00:12:42,640
欢迎来到枫滴旅馆

372
00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:43,820
大家都很期待来这里吗

373
00:12:43,820 --> 00:12:45,380
玩得开心吗

374
00:12:46,590 --> 00:12:48,390
不开心

375
00:12:49,140 --> 00:12:50,090
好了 Gina

376
00:12:50,090 --> 00:12:51,290
我们得马上行动了

377
00:12:51,290 --> 00:12:52,940
刚才Diaz灌下去的那瓶感冒药

378
00:12:52,940 --> 00:12:54,530
是让人精神亢奋的那种

379
00:12:54,530 --> 00:12:55,760
她现在满地乱跑啊

380
00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:58,060
嗨 嗨嗨嗨 告诉你哟

381
00:12:58,060 --> 00:13:00,070
我又有一条可以审问嫌犯的新线索了

382
00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:03,220
那线索是州街上的一个毒枭

383
00:13:03,220 --> 00:13:03,870
哎哟

384
00:13:03,870 --> 00:13:06,000
怎么没人接电话呀

385
00:13:06,010 --> 00:13:07,740
我来 我来接

386
00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:09,040
你好

387
00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:10,000
不 这没有叫Michael的

388
00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:11,280
你打错了 再见

389
00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:12,340
我叫Michael啊

390
00:13:12,380 --> 00:13:13,970
这名字真蠢 不过这是你的名字

391
00:13:13,970 --> 00:13:14,750
你应该以此为荣

392
00:13:14,750 --> 00:13:16,750
因为你是我见过最棒的警探

393
00:13:16,780 --> 00:13:18,980
那当然了 Diaz 那当然了

394
00:13:19,020 --> 00:13:22,220
老娘的文件哪儿去了 耶

395
00:13:22,420 --> 00:13:25,020
她真是喝高了 再这样下去她脑袋会受不了的

396
00:13:25,020 --> 00:13:26,360
我得去审问那个嫌犯

397
00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:28,100
你把Diaz给看好了

398
00:13:28,100 --> 00:13:30,600
我可不想靠近她那张细菌脸

399
00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:32,600
能把她锁在隔离室吗

400
00:13:32,630 --> 00:13:34,330
不行 分散她的注意力就行

401
00:13:34,370 --> 00:13:36,940
好的 我会这么做的

402
00:13:37,690 --> 00:13:38,980
Rosa 到这儿来呀

403
00:13:39,290 --> 00:13:41,180
跟你说个秘密

404
00:13:41,340 --> 00:13:43,110
好的 但我很忙

405
00:13:43,140 --> 00:13:44,810
什么秘密 秘密是什么

406
00:13:44,810 --> 00:13:45,810
什么秘密呀

407
00:13:45,810 --> 00:13:47,180
就是这个 看见了吧

408
00:13:47,180 --> 00:13:48,340
让我出去

409
00:13:48,340 --> 00:13:49,730
我还得审犯人

410
00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:53,320
很多人觉得炒鸡蛋

411
00:13:53,350 --> 00:13:55,510
最容易做了

412
00:13:55,510 --> 00:13:58,320
这种想法实在太愚昧

413
00:13:58,320 --> 00:14:02,170
炒鸡蛋其实既精致又复杂

414
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:06,820
好的 现在把蛋液倒进锅里

415
00:14:06,820 --> 00:14:09,230
慢慢地 小心点

416
00:14:11,900 --> 00:14:12,800
好了 现在呢

417
00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:13,440
我的老天爷

418
00:14:13,470 --> 00:14:14,810
听见滋滋声了吗

419
00:14:14,810 --> 00:14:18,180
这说明温度有点高了

420
00:14:18,210 --> 00:14:20,250
可是温度越高 蛋熟得越快

421
00:14:20,250 --> 00:14:22,250
Kevin就能越早吃上了 我有说错吗

422
00:14:22,720 --> 00:14:24,820
没有 你的想法很对

423
00:14:24,820 --> 00:14:27,750
但也不能让Kevin吃烧焦的东西对吧

424
00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:30,840
做菜是需要耐心的

425
00:14:31,270 --> 00:14:33,490
你是脑子进水了吗

426
00:14:33,530 --> 00:14:36,630
永远不能直接把盐罐子往锅里洒

427
00:14:36,660 --> 00:14:40,700
要用手 手是桥梁 懂了吗

428
00:14:41,110 --> 00:14:45,220
在烹饪界 你刚才的做法就像上床没戴套一样

429
00:14:47,410 --> 00:14:49,010
知道吗

430
00:14:49,010 --> 00:14:53,280
你 长官 还没有达到炒鸡蛋的水平

431
00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:55,080
交出你的锅铲

432
00:14:55,610 --> 00:14:56,380
没问题

433
00:14:58,180 --> 00:15:00,090
我只希望能找回

434
00:15:00,090 --> 00:15:03,560
花在这些无用功上的时间

435
00:15:03,640 --> 00:15:06,890
我就给Kevin烤面包当早餐好了

436
00:15:06,890 --> 00:15:09,290
逼格太低了

437
00:15:09,330 --> 00:15:11,360
Boyle 我闻到了糊味

438
00:15:11,360 --> 00:15:13,530
Hitchcock又在暖气片上烤玉米了吗

439
00:15:13,570 --> 00:15:14,970
没有

440
00:15:14,970 --> 00:15:18,270
你闻到的是我和警监关系的一塌糊涂

441
00:15:18,300 --> 00:15:20,870
所以没有烤玉米了

442
00:15:21,830 --> 00:15:26,080
你的分手理由是我爱喝啤酒

443
00:15:26,110 --> 00:15:27,280
我 我也爱喝其他酒啊

444
00:15:32,390 --> 00:15:33,790
琼浆玉露 我还想要

445
00:15:34,150 --> 00:15:35,690
不仅仅是啤酒的事

446
00:15:35,690 --> 00:15:38,190
还有很多其他原因

447
00:15:38,220 --> 00:15:39,520
听起来不太对啊

448
00:15:39,530 --> 00:15:42,260
作为律师 让你及时住嘴是我的义务

449
00:15:43,050 --> 00:15:47,730
好吧 其实是我们之间没有激情了

450
00:15:47,770 --> 00:15:48,970
听起来有点含糊

451
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:52,040
是因为你很 无趣

452
00:15:52,530 --> 00:15:53,610
不 这样说太残忍了

453
00:15:53,610 --> 00:15:55,410
所以我才想写下来斟词酌句的嘛

454
00:15:55,990 --> 00:15:58,310
能给我两个小时用用电脑吗

455
00:15:58,310 --> 00:15:59,540
我要打一份草稿

456
00:15:59,580 --> 00:16:00,580
好主意

457
00:16:00,580 --> 00:16:02,010
在这期间 我们可以随便聊聊

458
00:16:02,050 --> 00:16:03,850
我想说 我们该走了

459
00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:05,380
不 我认为你们该留下

460
00:16:05,420 --> 00:16:07,390
我们可以谈谈

461
00:16:07,390 --> 00:16:09,470
我和Amy的恋爱中真正的绊脚石

462
00:16:09,470 --> 00:16:10,220
那就是你 Jake

463
00:16:10,220 --> 00:16:11,960
不 什么情况

464
00:16:12,250 --> 00:16:15,330
可以谈谈你做卧底前向她告白的事

465
00:16:15,550 --> 00:16:17,430
你喜欢过Amy

466
00:16:17,460 --> 00:16:19,130
是喜欢过

467
00:16:19,390 --> 00:16:21,620
但已经是很久以前的事了

468
00:16:21,620 --> 00:16:22,300
是吗

469
00:16:22,300 --> 00:16:24,260
我知道你回来以后也告白过

470
00:16:24,690 --> 00:16:25,470
每次你说这件事

471
00:16:25,470 --> 00:16:26,490
她就会很困扰

472
00:16:26,490 --> 00:16:28,450
然后我们的恋爱就止步不前

473
00:16:28,450 --> 00:16:31,140
要我说 这是因为她也喜欢你

474
00:16:32,580 --> 00:16:34,350
真的吗

475
00:16:34,500 --> 00:16:35,310
也许吧

476
00:16:36,150 --> 00:16:37,350
是吧

477
00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:39,860
有一点

478
00:16:39,860 --> 00:16:42,690
我当时很困扰

479
00:16:42,720 --> 00:16:45,260
我现在真的需要一台电脑

480
00:16:45,260 --> 00:16:47,960
抱歉 这信息量对我来说太大了

481
00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:50,940
我得去楼上揪几个娃娃的脑袋

482
00:16:50,940 --> 00:16:51,500
晚安

483
00:16:51,500 --> 00:16:52,830
我也该走了

484
00:16:52,870 --> 00:16:54,430
麻烦你把我的牙刷

485
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:56,000
和家用酿酒桶放门口

486
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:57,800
我明天去取

487
00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:01,670
我猜这是我最后一次邀请Teddy出来玩了哈

488
00:17:02,780 --> 00:17:04,790
生活处处是惊喜

489
00:17:08,590 --> 00:17:09,350
我得走了

490
00:17:09,350 --> 00:17:11,480
我也是

491
00:17:18,150 --> 00:17:19,850
嘿 是我

492
00:17:19,850 --> 00:17:22,920
开开门吧

493
00:17:22,920 --> 00:17:26,660
拜托 我们谈谈 我很抱歉

494
00:17:26,660 --> 00:17:27,790
有什么需要帮忙的吗

495
00:17:27,790 --> 00:17:29,800
不 你不是Sophia

496
00:17:29,830 --> 00:17:31,430
Jake 在这边

497
00:17:31,460 --> 00:17:34,370
不好意思 先生

498
00:17:34,370 --> 00:17:35,970
你的房号错了

499
00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:37,940
是你敲错了吧

500
00:17:38,070 --> 00:17:39,050
说啥呢

501
00:17:39,570 --> 00:17:41,310
愤怒的小老头啊

502
00:17:41,340 --> 00:17:43,180
我知道刚才的事听起来很尴尬

503
00:17:43,180 --> 00:17:45,680
但我发誓 我不喜欢Amy了

504
00:17:45,710 --> 00:17:46,850
这跟听起来无关 Jake

505
00:17:46,850 --> 00:17:48,050
重要的是我所看到的

506
00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:49,650
你真该看看你当时的表情

507
00:17:49,650 --> 00:17:50,950
在你听说Amy喜欢你的时候

508
00:17:50,950 --> 00:17:53,050
听我说的是什么话

509
00:17:53,050 --> 00:17:53,810
"喜欢过"

510
00:17:53,820 --> 00:17:55,090
我是成年人了

511
00:17:55,090 --> 00:17:57,860
这种谁喜欢谁的把戏太幼稚了

512
00:17:57,890 --> 00:17:59,590
我知道很蠢 你说得对

513
00:17:59,590 --> 00:18:01,630
但重点是 我喜欢的是你

514
00:18:02,110 --> 00:18:03,590
你确定对Amy没感觉了吗

515
00:18:03,590 --> 00:18:04,400
确定

516
00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:05,900
我可没敲Amy的门

517
00:18:05,900 --> 00:18:07,130
敲的是你的

518
00:18:07,910 --> 00:18:09,900
其实你敲的是他的门

519
00:18:09,900 --> 00:18:11,340
而且我敢肯定他在偷听

520
00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:12,740
我没有

521
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,250
Amy是谁

522
00:18:14,250 --> 00:18:15,360
进来说

523
00:18:15,580 --> 00:18:16,780
谢谢

524
00:18:16,780 --> 00:18:19,110
玩偶们怎么还没走

525
00:18:22,340 --> 00:18:23,150
早上好 Boyle

526
00:18:23,180 --> 00:18:24,920
早上好 警监

527
00:18:24,950 --> 00:18:26,360
昨天我们争执过后

528
00:18:26,360 --> 00:18:29,040
我上网看了你的美食博客和做的食物

529
00:18:29,220 --> 00:18:30,010
出乎意料的是

530
00:18:30,010 --> 00:18:33,870
我发现食物真的能有深刻内涵

531
00:18:33,870 --> 00:18:35,000
所以我给Kevin做了这个

532
00:18:35,900 --> 00:18:36,890
还是热的

533
00:18:36,900 --> 00:18:37,930
那是法式吐司

534
00:18:38,220 --> 00:18:40,950
Kevin和我曾在雨中的巴黎共享一份吐司

535
00:18:40,950 --> 00:18:42,620
那天正是我们第一个纪念日

536
00:18:43,370 --> 00:18:44,940
也是我们最珍贵的回忆之一

537
00:18:45,540 --> 00:18:46,900
它肯定达不到你的高标准

538
00:18:46,900 --> 00:18:48,990
但Kevin看来很享受

539
00:18:48,990 --> 00:18:53,780
谢谢你的指导

540
00:18:59,890 --> 00:19:02,090
很难吃吧

541
00:19:02,090 --> 00:19:03,590
不

542
00:19:03,680 --> 00:19:05,260
堪称完美

543
00:19:05,260 --> 00:19:07,640
他是个天生的大厨

544
00:19:08,930 --> 00:19:11,800
现在我知道Salieri发掘天才时的感受了

545
00:19:11,830 --> 00:19:12,900
Diaz还好吗

546
00:19:12,900 --> 00:19:15,680
挺好 她被锁五分钟就睡着了

547
00:19:15,680 --> 00:19:18,340
睡了十小时都不带翻身的

548
00:19:18,340 --> 00:19:20,140
还说梦话

549
00:19:20,170 --> 00:19:22,640
我要把你的脑袋揪下来

550
00:19:22,680 --> 00:19:25,180
我要把你的脑袋揪下来 奶奶

551
00:19:25,180 --> 00:19:27,580
小泰熊 如果她长睡不醒怎么办

552
00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:33,150
天哪

553
00:19:33,150 --> 00:19:34,590
看啊 是Rosa

554
00:19:34,590 --> 00:19:35,750
你看起来不错呀

555
00:19:35,760 --> 00:19:37,320
我该走啦 回见

556
00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:39,490
你最好别溜 因为我迟早会抓到你

557
00:19:39,490 --> 00:19:41,790
我折磨完犯人 你就是下一个

558
00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:43,430
我已经替你审完了

559
00:19:43,430 --> 00:19:44,530
什么

560
00:19:44,530 --> 00:19:46,130
我逼他供出了猪咯咯的供应商

561
00:19:46,130 --> 00:19:47,130
都搞定了

562
00:19:47,130 --> 00:19:48,900
回家去好好休息吧

563
00:19:48,900 --> 00:19:50,070
我自己能行的

564
00:19:50,100 --> 00:19:51,470
不 你不行

565
00:19:51,470 --> 00:19:54,410
你从昨天起昏睡了一天

566
00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:56,580
你知道你想表现得不需要帮助

567
00:19:56,580 --> 00:19:58,310
但所有人都会需要的

568
00:19:58,310 --> 00:20:01,210
我做深蹲的时候还让五个人帮我盯着呢

569
00:20:01,210 --> 00:20:03,980
Terry给我20块 让我把你锁起来

570
00:20:03,980 --> 00:20:05,350
不 我没有

571
00:20:05,380 --> 00:20:06,900
但我借花献佛

572
00:20:06,900 --> 00:20:08,420
给你特制了一个护理箱

573
00:20:08,420 --> 00:20:12,120
叫作"Rosa会打败感冒这个小婊砸"

574
00:20:15,090 --> 00:20:18,730
现在正是你该说"谢谢你们的帮助"的时候了

575
00:20:20,270 --> 00:20:23,200
谢谢你们的帮助

576
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,500
等等 你嘴边挂的是微笑吗

577
00:20:25,540 --> 00:20:28,010
有可能

578
00:20:28,010 --> 00:20:32,840
我的免疫力已经虚弱到控制不了笑肌了

579
00:20:36,580 --> 00:20:38,350
你还好吗

580
00:20:38,350 --> 00:20:39,480
喝点佳得乐

581
00:20:40,190 --> 00:20:41,120
好

582
00:20:45,420 --> 00:20:47,690
看来昨晚打击不小啊

583
00:20:48,190 --> 00:20:50,150
其实我觉得这样最好

584
00:20:50,150 --> 00:20:51,260
我终于可以放下心理包袱

585
00:20:51,260 --> 00:20:53,830
没错 有时候就得撕下创口贴

586
00:20:53,830 --> 00:20:56,740
让伤口尽情放血

587
00:20:56,740 --> 00:20:58,740
根本没有这样的说法好吗

588
00:20:58,740 --> 00:21:00,070
肯定有

589
00:21:01,970 --> 00:21:04,110
你和Sophia怎么样了

590
00:21:04,210 --> 00:21:05,880
很好 我们谈妥了

591
00:21:05,880 --> 00:21:07,350
决定继续在一起

592
00:21:07,350 --> 00:21:08,600
我跟她说

593
00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:09,850
我和你已经是过去式了

594
00:21:09,850 --> 00:21:11,350
现在我们俩只是朋友

595
00:21:14,090 --> 00:21:15,350
你别误会

596
00:21:15,350 --> 00:21:17,990
知道你喜欢过我 我很开心

597
00:21:17,990 --> 00:21:19,760
我会经常把这事拿出来说的

598
00:21:19,790 --> 00:21:20,990
很好

599
00:21:20,990 --> 00:21:24,460
我们该左拐了吗 在这条"暗恋"道上

600
00:21:24,460 --> 00:21:26,260
哈 哈

601
00:21:26,270 --> 00:21:29,030
我也可以抄近路 在这条"爱慕"大街

602
00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:30,470
别再说了啊 到时候车毁人亡别怪我

603
00:21:30,470 --> 00:21:31,440
别呀