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我的警探同事们

2
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我们的工作从来都不轻松

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工作时间长

4
00:00:04,970 --> 00:00:06,890
时常伴随着危险

5
00:00:06,890 --> 00:00:08,960
而且工资简直是呵呵哒

6
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但今天 我们看到了一丝希望

7
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因为今天

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新的自动贩卖机到了

9
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让我们瞻仰它的光芒

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充满力量 充满希望

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更重要的是

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还富含钠 谷蛋白和脂肪

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棒

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现在我们终于迎来

15
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为这台机器洗礼的时刻

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Boyle 香槟呢

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严格意义上来说

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这是来自Tarnok山谷的匈牙利起泡酒

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你人生中能不能别煞风景一回

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把酒瓶给他

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谢谢

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我在此将你洗礼

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"零食城"

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哇哦

25
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好吧 只是键盘坏了

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零食还都好好的

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喔哦

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走 走 快走

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好了好了

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不

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牺牲的应该是我 应该是我

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神烦警探 第三季 第九集

33
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嫌疑犯的名字是Karl Ove

34
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我的线人说他在一个蓝摊子外

35
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卖假冒伪劣的鱼子酱

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这里闻着就像一只乌贼

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在一只鲸的屁股里放了屁

38
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确实跟你说的一模一样

39
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这修辞用的不错

40
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下个星期是我和Amy的六个月纪念日

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我要不要给她准备特别的礼物

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你知道我喜欢我们关系中的哪点吗 Jake

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我们不聊各自的感情生活

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和家庭 还有任何想法

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所以你是我这世界上最亲的朋友

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我知道 但我真的需要点帮助

47
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我问了Boyle 他的主意屁用都没有

48
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让她怀上你的孩子吧 Jake

49
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你还在等什么

50
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就这么办啊 问题解决了

51
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看 是我们要找的人

52
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你好 先生 我们是纽约警署的

53
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我想问你几个问题

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啊 虾

55
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讨厌死了

56
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你被捕了 小子

57
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没人能逃过我Jake Per  啊

58
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有好恶心的东西碰到我了

59
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好恶心 恶心 恶心

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等等 那是什么

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我们来看看

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啥玩意

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我完全听不懂你在说什么

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就像我立刻猜到的一样

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这是一串精致的39克拉的钻石项链

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它六周前在斯德哥尔摩皇家博物馆被盗

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我刚收到国际刑警的通知

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有两名警探正从瑞典赶来

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接走这名嫌疑犯

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一定要热烈地迎接他们

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何止是热烈

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我们还要铺上红地毯

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和国际刑警一起破珠宝失窃案

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简直是我人生中最美好的事

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- 第二美好啦  - 嘴真甜

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当然是最美好

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我骗Amy的

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你们认不认识想买二手教科书的人

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我爱死它们了

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自我教学永远为时不晚

81
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就是没有人咯

82
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真是太棒了

83
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为什么要扔掉它们

84
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因为我是永远过不了

85
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这个天文学期末考了

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所以我就不能毕业了

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所以我一生就要被毁了

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我们俩可以辅助你学习啊

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我可是以优等成绩毕业于雪城大学的

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我知道听起来像是在自夸

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因为我确实是在自夸

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Terry完全秒杀了大学

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还有 我对天文学还是略知一二的

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我在天文馆过了11个生日呢

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这个也是自夸

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天啊 你们俩真是没救了的书呆子

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不过这也许正是我现在需要的

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无可救药的书呆子们

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行

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你们两个书呆子可以辅导我

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我们还得谢谢你啰

102
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你们太客气了

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Peralta Diaz

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这位是巡官Knausgaard

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和副巡官Carlsson

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他们坐了8小时的飞机才到达

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能和你们讨论你们的飞行时长

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我感到很荣幸

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日安

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我本来想先问你们飞了多长时间呢

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是8个小时

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对 我知道

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我开完笑的 抱歉

114
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一定是翻译过去就没那么好笑了

115
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不 我们完全明白你说的话

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所有瑞典人都说英语

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我们还会说挪威语 荷兰语 德语

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法语 俄语 还有芬兰语

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但不会说丹麦语

120
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因为那是垃圾的人说的垃圾语言

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噢 说得没错

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我基本上能记住"江南style"的歌词发音

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所以我们没差啦

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我不明白这个词 "没差"是什么意思

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从上下文来看可能是"无知者无畏"的意思

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- 这样啊  - 所以

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- 不是的  - 我们的嫌疑犯在哪

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正在办手续

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在等待的时候

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请允许我送上我最爱的餐厅的

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布鲁克林最棒的美食

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来自我们楼下的小吃摊

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真的很棒

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嗯 Soren不能吃这个

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他对乳糖 谷蛋白和番茄酱过敏

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Agneta也不能吃

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她和丈夫打算再要一个孩子

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所以她不能吃任何会改变她子宫颈pH值的东西

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这样啊

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你们俩关系很近啊

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在瑞典 我们认为一个团队要良好运作

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队员们需要完全相互坦诚

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是的 我们之间没有秘密

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包括我们的身体

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我们经常一起蒸桑拿

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我们也很亲近的

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Rosa有次看到我穿泳衣的样子

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我没有 你让我转过身去了

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- 没错  - 既然我们不能

150
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吃你们这些恶心的路边摊食物

151
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你们能不能看看手续办好了没有

152
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无意冒犯 只是

153
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这里看起来很脏乱 你们俩看起来很不专业

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不专业

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好吧 我们本来打算邀请你们去我们最喜欢的

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激光射击区 但现在

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我正式取消对你们的邀请

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Rosa 我们走

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啊 Boyle 我们正要找你

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Kevin得到了一个在索邦大学

161
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任教六个月的职位

162
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噢 我太爱巴黎了

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至少是爱电影"美食总动员"里面描绘的巴黎

164
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呃 就是那个老鼠厨师

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好吧 虽然有些牵强

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总之 Kevin和我是公园坡壁球俱乐部的成员

167
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我们在那里建立了壁球双打时代

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我们已经连续两年夺取了冠军

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不幸的是 今年的比赛

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我恰好要飞往巴黎

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要飞7个小时

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我记得你告诉我你大学时打过壁球

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我可在莎拉劳伦斯学院得过三次冠军

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本来应该是四次 但大四的时候我参演了学校的

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"星光快车" 饰演了外国佬

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选角眼光很独特啊

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无论如何 如果你能代我与Raymond一起

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赢得三连胜 我倍感荣幸

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当然了 我很高兴能帮忙

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- 很好  - 太棒了

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好

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太好了 太好了

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- 完蛋了  - 怎么了

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你不老是说你想和Holt多相处的吗

185
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不是这样相处

186
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壁球会激发我的好斗欲

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我会摔球拍 会骂人 还露屁股羞辱人

188
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有一次我为了逼疯对方

189
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我看着他的眼睛 吃下了一颗球

190
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这不可能

191
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那球还在我的体内 Terry

192
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你好好玩就行了

193
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放轻松 开心打就好

194
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对 对 对 好

195
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只是比赛而已

196
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是为了放松的

197
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Holt没必要看到我释放内心的野兽

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好的

199
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这小矮子怪怪的

200
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没准他们在告诉Holt警监他们有多享受一起蒸桑拿

201
00:06:48,290 --> 00:06:48,990
拜托

202
00:06:48,990 --> 00:06:51,180
他们觉得知道对方对什么过敏就特别了不起了

203
00:06:51,190 --> 00:06:52,290
你知道我对什么过敏吗

204
00:06:52,330 --> 00:06:53,760
- 知道 对那俩人过敏  - 没错

205
00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:55,730
但我对蜜蜂也过敏 你该知道的

206
00:06:55,770 --> 00:06:57,670
如果我被蜜蜂叮了 有可能会死

207
00:06:57,700 --> 00:06:59,230
警探们 我和两位巡官谈过了

208
00:06:59,270 --> 00:07:02,070
这起珠宝盗窃案有了新进展

209
00:07:02,100 --> 00:07:03,470
发音真完美 警监

210
00:07:03,510 --> 00:07:05,040
谢谢 他们认为这名嫌犯

211
00:07:05,070 --> 00:07:07,680
可能走私了更多失窃的瑞典钻石到布鲁克林

212
00:07:07,710 --> 00:07:09,040
哦 谢谢提醒

213
00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:10,480
一路顺风 慢走不送

214
00:07:10,510 --> 00:07:12,550
我们一找到钻石就会寄给你们的

215
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他们会留下来和你们一起破案

216
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真棒呢

217
00:07:16,790 --> 00:07:19,090
Rosa 你能把我的车装满一百万只蜜蜂吗

218
00:07:21,130 --> 00:07:23,670
好吧 既然这两个瑞典人很无礼地迟到了

219
00:07:23,700 --> 00:07:25,480
我们来谈谈纪念日礼物吧

220
00:07:25,530 --> 00:07:27,640
我应该送她随意一点的礼物 比如小酒杯

221
00:07:27,670 --> 00:07:29,930
还是不那么随便的礼物 比如

222
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金色的小酒杯

223
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依然不在乎 要不别等新搭档了

224
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开始搜查嫌犯的公寓吧

225
00:07:35,550 --> 00:07:37,550
好 我们会找到线索破案

226
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让他们出洋相

227
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他们可以跟在我们后面吃灰了

228
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不 不

229
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Soren可能对灰尘过敏呢

230
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你好啊

231
00:07:44,790 --> 00:07:46,490
是的 我对灰尘过敏

232
00:07:46,810 --> 00:07:47,760
每个人都过敏

233
00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:48,750
这是打喷嚏的原因

234
00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:49,530
你才是打喷嚏的原因

235
00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:50,690
好了

236
00:07:50,730 --> 00:07:52,030
你们在这干嘛

237
00:07:52,060 --> 00:07:53,730
在瑞典 我们管这叫警务工作

238
00:07:53,770 --> 00:07:55,430
难道你们这没有这种说法吗

239
00:07:55,470 --> 00:07:57,230
- 我恨你  - 这是我们的案子

240
00:07:57,270 --> 00:07:58,430
你们不能撇下我们私自调查

241
00:07:58,470 --> 00:08:00,140
把你那奇怪无毛的手指拿开

242
00:08:00,170 --> 00:08:02,140
Soren刮指毛是为了骑自行车

243
00:08:02,170 --> 00:08:03,440
那样能减小阻力

244
00:08:03,480 --> 00:08:04,740
Agneta是我最忠实的粉丝

245
00:08:04,780 --> 00:08:07,340
就像我也是她的抨击诗最大的粉丝

246
00:08:07,380 --> 00:08:09,410
- 你们想听吗  - 我想吗

247
00:08:09,450 --> 00:08:11,410
-我不想  - 你的损失

248
00:08:11,450 --> 00:08:13,480
我们已经把整栋公寓都搜过了

249
00:08:13,520 --> 00:08:15,220
是吗 现在该我们来搜一搜了

250
00:08:15,250 --> 00:08:18,050
然后发现你们都漏掉的东西 比如这个

251
00:08:18,090 --> 00:08:19,120
你自己的钥匙

252
00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:20,120
完全正确

253
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:21,760
装起来 Diaz

254
00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:24,730
天文学充满了有趣的知识

255
00:08:24,730 --> 00:08:26,660
天文学 基础课
天文学充满了有趣的知识

256
00:08:26,700 --> 00:08:30,630
比如 有件事好莱坞可不愿让你知道

257
00:08:30,670 --> 00:08:34,700
秒差距其实是一种衡量距离的尺度

258
00:08:34,740 --> 00:08:37,240
这是"星球大战"里众多漏洞之一

259
00:08:37,620 --> 00:08:39,610
嗯哼 什么是"星球大战"

260
00:08:40,820 --> 00:08:41,680
天哪

261
00:08:42,050 --> 00:08:43,480
或许我讲得太超前了

262
00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:45,980
好吧 我们来说星球

263
00:08:46,020 --> 00:08:48,520
木星是气态巨行星

264
00:08:48,550 --> 00:08:49,520
Hitchcock也是

265
00:08:49,550 --> 00:08:50,550
然而这有什么用

266
00:08:50,590 --> 00:08:52,660
它还有六十七颗卫星

267
00:08:52,690 --> 00:08:55,420
我想出了一种能把它们全部记住的口诀

268
00:08:55,460 --> 00:08:56,430
听着

269
00:08:56,460 --> 00:08:58,560
"在每人拿一只蜡笔之前

270
00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:00,100
告诉他气势汹汹的

271
00:09:00,130 --> 00:09:02,630
叫Ernest的小猫鼬画家

272
00:09:02,670 --> 00:09:07,200
有人在有关迷你熊猫头的事上说谎 句号

273
00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:10,540
或许有个孩子可以带着她的大象

274
00:09:10,580 --> 00:09:13,240
去加利福尼亚 除非"

275
00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:16,050
Gina去哪里了

276
00:09:16,080 --> 00:09:18,050
她告诉我你说我是"气态巨行星"

277
00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:21,020
现在我们永远也不可能勾搭上了

278
00:09:23,350 --> 00:09:25,050
啊噢 这是什么

279
00:09:25,090 --> 00:09:28,000
一份从你的小光手中溜走的小小的证据

280
00:09:28,270 --> 00:09:30,750
一份被塞在抽屉最里面的航运名单

281
00:09:30,780 --> 00:09:31,960
十月十一号我们的嫌犯把一个

282
00:09:31,980 --> 00:09:34,350
集装箱运进了湾脊区的一个船坞

283
00:09:34,580 --> 00:09:35,400
那个箱子一个月前就到了

284
00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:36,540
我觉得你们什么都找不到

285
00:09:36,540 --> 00:09:37,600
拜托 你只是生气

286
00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:39,770
我们破了案子 而你们虾米也没找到

287
00:09:39,800 --> 00:09:41,770
是的 我会说西班牙语

288
00:09:41,810 --> 00:09:43,810
其实 我们找到的东西比虾米可多了

289
00:09:43,840 --> 00:09:45,140
该死 他也会说西班牙语

290
00:09:45,180 --> 00:09:48,110
Agneta找到了一封今晚派对的邀请函

291
00:09:48,150 --> 00:09:50,050
地点在

292
00:09:50,080 --> 00:09:51,180
Alvar Gustavsson家里

293
00:09:51,420 --> 00:09:52,850
"真爱如血"里的那个金发帅哥吗

294
00:09:53,140 --> 00:09:55,570
错 是那个参与集团犯罪的瑞典百万富翁

295
00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:56,290
Alvar Gustavsson

296
00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:59,090
噢 那个 Alvar Gooz-hev-vren啥的

297
00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:01,090
好吧 你们尽管往那条死胡同追查下去吧

298
00:10:01,130 --> 00:10:03,390
我们要去找那个集装箱然后追回珠宝了

299
00:10:03,430 --> 00:10:05,030
而且为了庆祝 Rosa可能会戴着它们

300
00:10:05,060 --> 00:10:06,560
去你们愚蠢的派对

301
00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:08,400
别 它们是无价之宝 请不要那么做

302
00:10:08,430 --> 00:10:09,670
当然了 我们不会这么做

303
00:10:09,700 --> 00:10:10,870
我们只是在耍贱

304
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:12,440
一会见了 贱人们

305
00:10:12,470 --> 00:10:14,440
- 好的  - 拜 Jake 拜 Rosie

306
00:10:17,570 --> 00:10:19,410
你准备好了吗 Boyle

307
00:10:19,440 --> 00:10:21,040
- 斗志激昂吗 - 没有 怎么了

308
00:10:21,080 --> 00:10:22,110
我看起来很有斗志吗

309
00:10:22,150 --> 00:10:23,280
因为我绝对没有

310
00:10:23,610 --> 00:10:24,570
我只是来享乐的

311
00:10:24,850 --> 00:10:25,650
还要赢

312
00:10:25,680 --> 00:10:28,020
嘿 如果我们只享乐 不摔球拍

313
00:10:28,050 --> 00:10:31,120
也不乱吃壁球 那么我们都是赢家

314
00:10:31,160 --> 00:10:33,060
- 什么  - 没什么 我来发球

315
00:10:38,930 --> 00:10:40,110
- 出界  - 什么

316
00:10:40,110 --> 00:10:41,500
你是不是疯了

317
00:10:41,530 --> 00:10:45,300
那明明是

318
00:10:45,340 --> 00:10:46,570
很有意思

319
00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:48,400
那是个有意思的判定

320
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:51,870
你真是个有意思的人 很有趣

321
00:10:51,910 --> 00:10:54,880
这很有趣 非常有趣

322
00:10:57,350 --> 00:10:58,310
Gina

323
00:10:58,350 --> 00:10:59,680
我知道天文学会

324
00:10:59,720 --> 00:11:01,380
有点让人害怕还烧脑

325
00:11:01,420 --> 00:11:03,120
但是我请来了一个朋友

326
00:11:03,150 --> 00:11:05,820
他可以让天文学变得非常有趣

327
00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:09,790
这谁

328
00:11:09,830 --> 00:11:11,560
你好 Gina 我是Neil deGrasse Tyson

329
00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:12,560
给我个在乎的理由

330
00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:14,360
海登天文馆的馆长

331
00:11:14,850 --> 00:11:17,080
世界顶尖的天体物理学家之一

332
00:11:17,130 --> 00:11:18,640
他可是在帮我个大忙呢

333
00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:20,900
你是怎么认识Terrance的 太空领带人

334
00:11:21,170 --> 00:11:22,070
我们是健身伙伴

335
00:11:23,980 --> 00:11:25,780
我去 Neil deGrasse Tyson

336
00:11:25,810 --> 00:11:27,280
你是怎么做到的

337
00:11:27,310 --> 00:11:28,810
这是物理 Terry

338
00:11:28,850 --> 00:11:31,010
物理而已

339
00:11:31,050 --> 00:11:32,210
Gina 你看

340
00:11:32,250 --> 00:11:33,750
给我两个小时

341
00:11:33,790 --> 00:11:35,420
你不仅能通过考试

342
00:11:35,450 --> 00:11:38,190
还能对我们"地球号"这架飞船

343
00:11:38,220 --> 00:11:42,260
穿梭其间的宇宙有更深刻的认识

344
00:11:42,290 --> 00:11:44,230
"地球号"飞船 得了吧

345
00:11:44,260 --> 00:11:46,530
你把地球说得都掉价了 这可是我的家

346
00:11:46,560 --> 00:11:48,530
Gina 你为什么想学天文学

347
00:11:48,570 --> 00:11:49,970
因为我以为它会很酷

348
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,770
就我一个人坐在那儿随手给卫星取名字

349
00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:55,980
比如 "蜥蜴王Zorp" "水烟枪" "野狗"

350
00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:58,210
还有"等等" 这也是其中一个名字

351
00:11:58,240 --> 00:11:59,210
"等等"

352
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:01,280
她要挂科了 是吧

353
00:12:01,310 --> 00:12:02,880
- 妥妥的  - 了解

354
00:12:03,510 --> 00:12:04,150
根据运输公司的记录

355
00:12:04,180 --> 00:12:07,180
十月十一号到的集装箱是34G1号

356
00:12:07,220 --> 00:12:08,180
好

357
00:12:08,220 --> 00:12:09,390
嘿 你和Marcus是怎么庆祝

358
00:12:09,420 --> 00:12:10,950
你们六个月纪念日的

359
00:12:10,990 --> 00:12:12,790
说之前想想 他可是梦幻又浪漫的人

360
00:12:12,820 --> 00:12:14,390
而我只有50块

361
00:12:14,430 --> 00:12:16,690
- Marcus和我分手了  - 啥 什么时候

362
00:12:16,730 --> 00:12:19,230
- 一个月前  - 一个月前

363
00:12:19,260 --> 00:12:20,660
我怎么不知道

364
00:12:20,700 --> 00:12:21,660
因为我们不谈这些屁事

365
00:12:21,700 --> 00:12:22,870
我们不像那两个瑞典人一样矬

366
00:12:22,900 --> 00:12:23,900
对的

367
00:12:23,940 --> 00:12:25,430
是 太对了

368
00:12:25,470 --> 00:12:27,740
如果Agneta和她老公掰了 她可能就只会说

369
00:12:27,770 --> 00:12:29,440
"噢 Soren 我的心碎了"

370
00:12:29,470 --> 00:12:30,570
然后他又会说

371
00:12:30,610 --> 00:12:32,140
"我该怎么帮你 真遗憾"

372
00:12:32,180 --> 00:12:34,140
然后给她一个温暖的拥抱

373
00:12:34,180 --> 00:12:35,340
她就会像傻瓜一样感觉好很多

374
00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:36,450
我们不需要这一套

375
00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:38,210
因为我们在一起做的事就是破案

376
00:12:38,250 --> 00:12:39,420
你懂的

377
00:12:39,450 --> 00:12:40,950
比如

378
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:42,320
34G1

379
00:12:42,560 --> 00:12:43,460
搞定

380
00:12:44,020 --> 00:12:46,360
我们就要追回一大堆钻石了

381
00:12:46,740 --> 00:12:47,740
正解

382
00:12:50,730 --> 00:12:53,530
是鱼 是鱼 Rosa

383
00:12:53,560 --> 00:12:54,560
呃

384
00:12:58,580 --> 00:13:00,180
瑞典佬

385
00:13:00,210 --> 00:13:01,580
你好啊 Jake

386
00:13:01,620 --> 00:13:02,880
你们错过了一场超赞的派对

387
00:13:02,920 --> 00:13:05,080
"真爱如血"里的金发帅哥确实去了

388
00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:06,820
- 非常酷的人  - 非常酷

389
00:13:06,850 --> 00:13:08,290
哦 挺好 嘿 我要说的话有点奇怪

390
00:13:08,320 --> 00:13:09,290
因为我讨厌你们

391
00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:10,390
但是我能问你们一个问题吗

392
00:13:10,420 --> 00:13:11,720
如果你和你老公分手了

393
00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:12,920
你会告诉Soren吗

394
00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:15,490
你这是在说笑话吗

395
00:13:15,530 --> 00:13:16,930
我会坚决要求他在场

396
00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:18,860
这样我老公可以靠着他的肩膀哭泣

397
00:13:18,900 --> 00:13:21,070
对 几年前 Agneta和Lars

398
00:13:21,100 --> 00:13:22,400
老怀不上孩子

399
00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:24,700
她根本不需要开口找我捐精子

400
00:13:24,740 --> 00:13:27,040
我早就把精子放在"射百惠"里准备着了

401
00:13:27,070 --> 00:13:30,440
哇 真是恶心死了

402
00:13:30,480 --> 00:13:31,740
我们能问你个问题吗

403
00:13:31,780 --> 00:13:33,440
- 嗯嗯  - 你怎么一股鱼腥味

404
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:34,510
这样卫生吗

405
00:13:34,550 --> 00:13:36,310
不 我们花了一晚上剖鱼肚子

406
00:13:36,350 --> 00:13:39,050
看看里面是不是藏了钻石

407
00:13:39,090 --> 00:13:40,590
- 找到了吗  - 你们真想知道么

408
00:13:40,620 --> 00:13:42,650
当然 这对案子进展有帮助

409
00:13:42,690 --> 00:13:43,660
没找到

410
00:13:43,690 --> 00:13:45,190
不过 我在其中一条里发现了电池

411
00:13:45,230 --> 00:13:47,290
什么变态会给鱼喂电池

412
00:13:47,330 --> 00:13:49,430
好吧 你们浪费时间的时候

413
00:13:49,460 --> 00:13:51,300
我们与那个疑为买家的男人

414
00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:53,060
安排了在十一月十四号会面

415
00:13:53,100 --> 00:13:54,500
- 呃  - 别担心 Soren

416
00:13:54,530 --> 00:13:56,900
我把你的自行车训练改在了十一月十六号

417
00:13:56,940 --> 00:13:58,440
还把牙医预约改成了十九号

418
00:13:58,470 --> 00:14:00,670
你真是太了解我了

419
00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:06,610
呃 这两个人真恶心

420
00:14:06,650 --> 00:14:07,710
他们这么喜欢彼此

421
00:14:07,750 --> 00:14:09,910
大概要开始拉手了吧

422
00:14:09,950 --> 00:14:11,380
他们还真拉着手

423
00:14:11,420 --> 00:14:13,480
嗯 他们确实很恶心

424
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,220
又高又漂亮 而且你都不想

425
00:14:15,260 --> 00:14:17,290
知道他们在"射百惠"里装了什么

426
00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:20,190
但说实话 我不知道他们那么亲近是不是坏事

427
00:14:20,230 --> 00:14:22,460
- 错 是最坏的事  - 好吧

428
00:14:22,500 --> 00:14:24,230
我的天哪 我刚刚想到了钻石会在哪儿

429
00:14:24,260 --> 00:14:25,500
我们以为集装箱是在

430
00:14:25,530 --> 00:14:27,730
十月十一号到的

431
00:14:27,770 --> 00:14:29,300
但是欧洲蠢货是反着写日期的

432
00:14:29,340 --> 00:14:31,240
我们要找的是十一月十号到的那个

433
00:14:31,270 --> 00:14:32,240
是的

434
00:14:32,270 --> 00:14:34,800
除了美国 其他国家的傻子都反着写日期

435
00:14:35,010 --> 00:14:36,260
- 我们走吧  - 好

436
00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:38,540
Boyle

437
00:14:38,580 --> 00:14:41,680
没什么问题吧 你的脑子

438
00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:42,850
没啊 我很好

439
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:43,950
我玩得很开心

440
00:14:43,980 --> 00:14:46,720
是 你已经说了162遍了

441
00:14:46,750 --> 00:14:48,550
你知道如果我们接下来这场比赛输了的话

442
00:14:48,590 --> 00:14:50,020
我们就被踢出联赛了

443
00:14:50,060 --> 00:14:51,890
嗯 但最要的是我们玩得很开心

444
00:14:51,930 --> 00:14:55,790
错 重要的是我们要赢得奖杯

445
00:14:55,830 --> 00:14:57,360
因为在Kevin去巴黎之前

446
00:14:57,400 --> 00:14:59,260
我答应过他我们会赢

447
00:14:59,300 --> 00:15:02,930
你知道为什么我选你做搭档吗

448
00:15:02,970 --> 00:15:04,840
因为我是你认识的最健壮的人吗

449
00:15:04,870 --> 00:15:07,440
错 因为我在"莎拉劳伦斯凤凰报"上读过一篇文章

450
00:15:07,470 --> 00:15:12,340
讲的是一个年轻人 人送外号"壁球疯癫狂"

451
00:15:12,380 --> 00:15:13,780
我不知道你在说什么

452
00:15:13,810 --> 00:15:15,010
文章上说

453
00:15:15,050 --> 00:15:17,920
那个疯子27比0绝杀

454
00:15:17,950 --> 00:15:20,650
我需要他做我的队友

455
00:15:20,690 --> 00:15:25,560
我需要你释放内心的野兽

456
00:15:26,540 --> 00:15:31,350
歌曲 Wild Sides by Motley Crue

457
00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:34,700
你们两个傻瓜准备好被碾压了么

458
00:15:34,730 --> 00:15:36,570
"啥 什么 呃"

459
00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:38,670
我踹你们屁股的时候你们就这副傻样

460
00:15:38,710 --> 00:15:42,040
因为Ray-Ray和"野兽"我根本就不屑

461
00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:43,370
一点也不屑

462
00:15:43,410 --> 00:15:44,980
呃 哇噢

463
00:15:45,010 --> 00:15:46,210
我们开始吧

464
00:15:50,390 --> 00:15:52,360
接招吧 衰人

465
00:15:58,560 --> 00:15:59,690
什么

466
00:15:59,730 --> 00:16:01,290
你逗我 你是在逗我吗

467
00:16:01,990 --> 00:16:02,760
好球

468
00:16:04,100 --> 00:16:06,460
打得好 就要这样 宝贝

469
00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:08,330
Gina 好消息

470
00:16:08,370 --> 00:16:11,300
噢不 Neil deGrasse Tyson来了吗

471
00:16:11,340 --> 00:16:13,070
他真是不放弃加我好友啊

472
00:16:13,110 --> 00:16:16,470
没来 但我们想出了让你通过考试的方法

473
00:16:16,510 --> 00:16:18,380
对 我们意识到我们想让你用

474
00:16:18,410 --> 00:16:20,280
我们的方法学习

475
00:16:20,310 --> 00:16:23,110
我们应该因材施教

476
00:16:24,280 --> 00:16:26,020
教学

477
00:16:26,050 --> 00:16:27,590
之舞

478
00:16:27,620 --> 00:16:31,290
13.8万亿年前 还是一片荒芜

479
00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:33,620
然后发生了大爆炸

480
00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:34,890
好极了

481
00:16:34,930 --> 00:16:37,600
Amy 往后退到墙边

482
00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,760
然后Terry 脱掉上衣

483
00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:41,400
我准备学习了

484
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:41,430
一小时后
我准备学习了

485
00:16:41,430 --> 00:16:42,460
一小时后

486
00:16:45,670 --> 00:16:48,670
这就是你计算视差距离的方法

487
00:16:48,710 --> 00:16:50,910
那么你准备好考试了吗

488
00:16:50,940 --> 00:16:52,010
噢 我今早就考完了

489
00:16:52,050 --> 00:16:53,480
我过了

490
00:16:53,510 --> 00:16:54,580
什么

491
00:16:54,610 --> 00:16:56,010
我真感动你们俩这么关心我

492
00:16:56,050 --> 00:16:58,950
所以我第一次真正打开了教科书

493
00:16:58,990 --> 00:17:01,850
谁知道 天文学确实很有意思

494
00:17:01,890 --> 00:17:04,390
而且我聪慧过人

495
00:17:04,420 --> 00:17:06,790
那你为什么还让我们把舞跳完

496
00:17:06,830 --> 00:17:08,090
两个原因

497
00:17:08,130 --> 00:17:11,100
第一个 第二个

498
00:17:11,130 --> 00:17:12,200
我理解

499
00:17:12,230 --> 00:17:15,330
一二 一二 一二 一二

500
00:17:19,510 --> 00:17:21,140
哈哈

501
00:17:21,170 --> 00:17:24,340
我们强多了

502
00:17:24,380 --> 00:17:25,640
大家为什么都喜欢这些东西

503
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:26,740
这只是发光的石头

504
00:17:26,780 --> 00:17:28,680
是啊 不懂

505
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:29,680
你应该高兴点

506
00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:30,780
我们找到了珠宝 我们赢了

507
00:17:30,820 --> 00:17:31,780
你说得对

508
00:17:31,820 --> 00:17:33,020
我们应该庆祝一下

509
00:17:33,050 --> 00:17:35,020
要不去酒吧 一言不发地喝酒吧

510
00:17:35,050 --> 00:17:36,020
好 听起来很棒

511
00:17:36,060 --> 00:17:37,020
不是啦 我是在嘲讽

512
00:17:37,060 --> 00:17:38,220
你怎么没有感觉到呢

513
00:17:38,260 --> 00:17:39,590
兄弟你在烦什么

514
00:17:39,630 --> 00:17:41,430
还在纠结纪念日礼物吗

515
00:17:41,460 --> 00:17:43,760
是 还有你没告诉我Marcus的事

516
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:45,160
我们不是朋友吗

517
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:46,560
你说话就像Soren或者Agneta

518
00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:47,570
他们之中那个男的

519
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:49,000
你爱怎么说他们都行

520
00:17:49,040 --> 00:17:50,940
但至少人家有好好交流

521
00:17:50,970 --> 00:17:53,470
我可从来没听过你作诗 Rosa

522
00:17:53,510 --> 00:17:54,910
你怎么突然在乎起这个来了

523
00:17:54,940 --> 00:17:56,640
非要听我生活里的零碎琐事吗

524
00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:59,440
因为我们都只谈工作的事

525
00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:01,150
我们二十岁的时候还好

526
00:18:01,180 --> 00:18:02,510
因为我们那时也只在乎工作的事

527
00:18:02,550 --> 00:18:04,750
但现在我们都是成年人了 我们生活中也发生了

528
00:18:04,780 --> 00:18:06,720
和朋友之间应该谈论的事情

529
00:18:06,750 --> 00:18:08,390
比如我和Amy 你和Marcus

530
00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:10,220
那我们就不是朋友了

531
00:18:10,260 --> 00:18:11,460
哇

532
00:18:11,490 --> 00:18:12,960
好吧 的确不是了

533
00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:17,930
- 我们在动  - 噢 真的吗

534
00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:20,330
谢谢分享你生活中如此亲密的细节

535
00:18:20,370 --> 00:18:21,670
- Jake  - 我知道 我们完了

536
00:18:21,700 --> 00:18:23,300
我又开启嘲讽脸了

537
00:18:26,030 --> 00:18:27,690
好了 我叫了后援

538
00:18:27,730 --> 00:18:29,390
我还给我所有朋友发了短信

539
00:18:29,390 --> 00:18:31,190
你会注意到你手机没有震动

540
00:18:31,380 --> 00:18:32,680
我觉得我们到红勾区了

541
00:18:32,710 --> 00:18:35,010
- 我们已经下了布鲁克林到皇后区的高速  - 想得美Rosa

542
00:18:35,050 --> 00:18:38,380
不要利用我第三喜欢的纽约高速来讨我的欢心

543
00:18:38,420 --> 00:18:39,380
闭嘴

544
00:18:39,420 --> 00:18:40,620
我们在停车场停下了

545
00:18:40,650 --> 00:18:41,720
大事不妙

546
00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:43,320
后援来不及赶到了

547
00:18:43,360 --> 00:18:44,510
只有我和你了

548
00:18:46,260 --> 00:18:47,560
卡车里有两个人的声音

549
00:18:47,590 --> 00:18:49,260
如果是碰头的话应该会有更多人

550
00:18:49,300 --> 00:18:51,130
- 行动提示词是"Glurg"  - 了解

551
00:18:57,390 --> 00:18:58,860
Flergen

552
00:18:58,940 --> 00:19:00,170
真的吗 是你吗

553
00:19:00,210 --> 00:19:02,710
自从Blorgenbergen我们还没再见过了呢

554
00:19:02,740 --> 00:19:03,780
你他妈是谁啊

555
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:05,780
搭把手 老傻瓜

556
00:19:05,810 --> 00:19:08,150
是我 Glurg

557
00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:09,450
警察 放下枪

558
00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:10,850
放下枪 你被捕了

559
00:19:10,880 --> 00:19:13,390
希望瑞典监狱有桑拿

560
00:19:13,420 --> 00:19:14,550
其实还真有

561
00:19:14,590 --> 00:19:15,840
还很不错

562
00:19:18,260 --> 00:19:20,130
Kevin 有个东西想让你看看

563
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:21,290
嗒达

564
00:19:21,330 --> 00:19:23,860
真厉害 三连冠是我们的了

565
00:19:23,900 --> 00:19:25,760
我很期待明年四连冠

566
00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:27,670
事实上 我们被终身禁赛了

567
00:19:27,700 --> 00:19:28,970
所有联赛都被禁了

568
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,040
不会吧 怎么回事儿

569
00:19:30,070 --> 00:19:31,270
都怪我 Kevin

570
00:19:31,310 --> 00:19:33,710
我用膝盖折断了第二名的奖杯

571
00:19:33,740 --> 00:19:34,970
然后扔进了小便池

572
00:19:35,010 --> 00:19:36,740
- 天哪  - 嗯

573
00:19:36,780 --> 00:19:38,780
但重点是

574
00:19:38,810 --> 00:19:39,840
我们很尽兴

575
00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:41,180
是的

576
00:19:41,210 --> 00:19:43,550
我们明天就会把珠宝带回瑞典了

577
00:19:43,580 --> 00:19:45,620
这下知道你们看错我们了吧

578
00:19:45,650 --> 00:19:46,890
我打赌你们觉得自己很蠢

579
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:48,120
其实 当你犯错的时候

580
00:19:48,160 --> 00:19:49,650
意味着你学到了新东西

581
00:19:49,690 --> 00:19:52,360
而所有学习的机会都是珍贵的

582
00:19:52,390 --> 00:19:54,130
呃 你们真是最糟糕的人

583
00:19:54,160 --> 00:19:55,590
愿你死在峡湾

584
00:19:55,630 --> 00:19:57,200
没有啦 我们只是说很高兴

585
00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:58,860
- 和你们一起合作  - 嗯 我知道

586
00:19:58,900 --> 00:20:01,000
但是你们态度让人恼火

587
00:20:01,030 --> 00:20:02,400
对 我赞成死在峡湾的事

588
00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:04,200
没虾米

589
00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:05,840
再见啦 Jake Rosie

590
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,340
我猜他们就是这么走路的吧

591
00:20:10,380 --> 00:20:11,780
把手放开啊 两个怪人

592
00:20:11,810 --> 00:20:13,010
上帝啊

593
00:20:13,050 --> 00:20:15,010
好吧

594
00:20:15,050 --> 00:20:16,180
今天干得不错

595
00:20:16,220 --> 00:20:17,750
我想我们也不必通过了解对方

596
00:20:17,780 --> 00:20:18,860
来互相依靠

597
00:20:19,360 --> 00:20:20,630
那就一言不发地喝酒吧

598
00:20:21,430 --> 00:20:22,550
这样很讨厌

599
00:20:22,790 --> 00:20:24,460
我们破了案子 还告诉瑞典人该怎么死

600
00:20:24,490 --> 00:20:26,660
我应该高兴的 但我能看出来你也很郁闷

601
00:20:26,690 --> 00:20:29,330
这样很糟 因为我们是朋友

602
00:20:29,360 --> 00:20:31,730
- 真的吗  - 真的

603
00:20:31,770 --> 00:20:33,060
还有 我想到你和Amy在纪念日

604
00:20:33,100 --> 00:20:34,470
可以做些什么了

605
00:20:34,500 --> 00:20:35,570
感谢苍天

606
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:36,670
我给她买的电子涂鸦板

607
00:20:36,700 --> 00:20:38,700
上面有一只鬣蜥在弹电吉他

608
00:20:38,740 --> 00:20:40,140
她不会喜欢的

609
00:20:40,170 --> 00:20:42,910
纽约公共图书馆允许VIP会员过夜

610
00:20:42,940 --> 00:20:44,840
噢 太完美了

611
00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:47,110
但是我要怎么才能成为VIP

612
00:20:47,150 --> 00:20:48,850
四年级的时候我忘记还"超级软糖"那本书

613
00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:50,650
从那以后就害怕再回去

614
00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:52,340
别担心 这事交给我

615
00:20:54,250 --> 00:20:55,390
我新男朋友在那里工作

616
00:20:55,420 --> 00:20:57,220
你跟我分享了

617
00:20:57,260 --> 00:20:58,560
他叫什么 不 等等

618
00:20:58,590 --> 00:21:00,340
- 我不想太得寸进尺  - 没事

619
00:21:01,300 --> 00:21:02,430
我想告诉你他的名字

620
00:21:04,060 --> 00:21:06,800
噢 好的 喝杯酒壮壮胆

621
00:21:06,830 --> 00:21:07,800
要说名字了

622
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:08,110
没有 再来一杯

623
00:21:09,720 --> 00:21:10,870
好的

624
00:21:11,610 --> 00:21:12,700
我的上帝

625
00:21:12,740 --> 00:21:13,880
放远点儿

626
00:21:14,540 --> 00:21:16,340
真希望这些酒是其他人点的

627
00:21:16,590 --> 00:21:17,150
没事的

628
00:21:17,170 --> 00:21:17,940
好

629
00:21:20,750 --> 00:21:22,790
- 他叫Tom  - 我爱这个名字