1
00:00:03,140 --> 00:00:04,300
各位 早上好

2
00:00:04,900 --> 00:00:05,960
早上好 警监

3
00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:07,250
看哪

4
00:00:07,450 --> 00:00:09,410
咱俩衣服都洒上吃的了

5
00:00:09,470 --> 00:00:11,210
你那是什么吃的 粥吗

6
00:00:11,300 --> 00:00:12,370
这个是

7
00:00:12,900 --> 00:00:14,010
燕麦

8
00:00:14,540 --> 00:00:15,610
嗯

9
00:00:16,140 --> 00:00:17,920
我的天哪

10
00:00:17,980 --> 00:00:19,320
他都不擦掉的

11
00:00:19,500 --> 00:00:20,920
他已经放弃人生了吧

12
00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:21,720
这是孤单

13
00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:24,430
自从Kevin离开他去了巴黎休假

14
00:00:24,630 --> 00:00:25,650
他跟变了个人似的

15
00:00:25,830 --> 00:00:27,030
我想让他多出去参加些活动

16
00:00:27,410 --> 00:00:29,740
我邀请他去参加酒吧问答 但他拒绝了我

17
00:00:29,980 --> 00:00:31,740
不是说我们"牛顿谜语队"需要他做外援

18
00:00:31,850 --> 00:00:33,300
我们是全国排名靠前的队伍 没啥大不了的

19
00:00:33,340 --> 00:00:34,470
是没什么大不了的

20
00:00:34,520 --> 00:00:38,140
你们都只是些好心的小傻瓜们

21
00:00:38,180 --> 00:00:39,730
你们想让他不那么寂寞

22
00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:41,520
你们应该这么做

23
00:00:41,650 --> 00:00:43,870
- 一袋卷宗  - 对 他是工作狂

24
00:00:43,940 --> 00:00:45,780
我以为你的案子都结了

25
00:00:45,850 --> 00:00:47,270
你昨晚一直在炫耀这事

26
00:00:47,300 --> 00:00:48,830
邻居吵架我都没听到结局

27
00:00:48,850 --> 00:00:50,580
结局就是俩人做爱了 他们总是那样

28
00:00:50,630 --> 00:00:51,430
不过我完全没性趣

29
00:00:51,470 --> 00:00:54,470
这是我第一年当警探的一个旧案子

30
00:00:54,520 --> 00:00:55,280
罪犯又有新活动了

31
00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:57,230
没 但Holt不需要知道这点

32
00:00:57,300 --> 00:00:58,250
所以你打算撒谎

33
00:00:58,300 --> 00:01:02,650
不 我要用一种方法 让他忘却悲伤

34
00:01:03,610 --> 00:01:04,630
那就是 分散注意力

35
00:01:07,940 --> 00:01:09,030
我消失啦

36
00:01:09,030 --> 00:01:09,070
神烦警探 第三季 第十二集
我消失啦

37
00:01:09,070 --> 00:01:10,490
神烦警探 第三季 第十二集

38
00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:31,720
警监 早上好

39
00:01:31,830 --> 00:01:33,780
你可能会问 为什么我要说意大利语

40
00:01:33,850 --> 00:01:34,560
那是西班牙语

41
00:01:34,650 --> 00:01:36,120
好吧 语言种类千千万嘛

42
00:01:36,160 --> 00:01:38,500
我的一个旧案子有新进展了

43
00:01:38,560 --> 00:01:42,580
我需要您老来帮助我 先生

44
00:01:42,760 --> 00:01:43,960
- 还是西班牙语  - 好吧

45
00:01:44,830 --> 00:01:47,300
Joey Garibaldi曾经是个黑帮头目

46
00:01:47,380 --> 00:01:49,120
差不多八年前 我已经快抓到他了

47
00:01:49,210 --> 00:01:50,160
但他却销声匿迹了

48
00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:53,430
可现在我又听到风声

49
00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:54,940
说他又冒头了

50
00:01:55,070 --> 00:01:56,210
你能帮我吗

51
00:01:57,230 --> 00:02:00,070
嗯 听上去挺有趣 算我一个

52
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,760
太好了 谢谢

53
00:02:01,900 --> 00:02:04,410
再见咯

54
00:02:04,870 --> 00:02:05,870
绝对是意大利语

55
00:02:07,180 --> 00:02:09,010
标准化测试吗

56
00:02:09,050 --> 00:02:10,410
我有个小诀窍

57
00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,360
拿涂改液涂满所有格子

58
00:02:12,470 --> 00:02:15,410
再对读卡器动点手脚 大家都能过

59
00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:17,630
这是我的警督考试的练习题

60
00:02:17,900 --> 00:02:19,140
真的太难了

61
00:02:19,410 --> 00:02:21,030
我一直考不到70分

62
00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:22,980
C减 这是最完美的分数了

63
00:02:23,070 --> 00:02:24,940
证明你有点头脑 但还是性感的

64
00:02:25,010 --> 00:02:27,380
Holt警监给了我他的卷子来帮我

65
00:02:28,920 --> 00:02:31,210
你瞧瞧阅卷人给他写的评语

66
00:02:31,410 --> 00:02:32,830
"感谢你写了这篇文章

67
00:02:33,010 --> 00:02:34,810
它帮助我成为更好的人"

68
00:02:35,250 --> 00:02:36,900
我永远不会成为和Holt一样优秀的领导的

69
00:02:37,100 --> 00:02:39,250
你不要老想着考试了

70
00:02:39,700 --> 00:02:43,340
生活中不只有分数和书本

71
00:02:43,540 --> 00:02:45,900
看看我 我从没上过专业舞蹈课

72
00:02:46,030 --> 00:02:47,250
但我现在

73
00:02:49,050 --> 00:02:50,580
简直就是舞动的奇迹

74
00:02:55,670 --> 00:02:57,250
你们看见Boyle了吗

75
00:02:57,320 --> 00:02:59,970
他在他桌子底下呢 缩成球了

76
00:03:00,010 --> 00:03:01,840
不是吧

77
00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:03,780
NBC悬疑剧

78
00:03:03,810 --> 00:03:05,010
你明知道看了会做噩梦的

79
00:03:05,180 --> 00:03:06,210
我好伤心

80
00:03:06,610 --> 00:03:08,030
Jason今早去世了

81
00:03:08,070 --> 00:03:09,230
我很抱歉 太惨了

82
00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:10,560
他是你的朋友吗

83
00:03:10,630 --> 00:03:11,560
他是我的狗狗

84
00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:12,870
哦 那就不是什么大事

85
00:03:13,030 --> 00:03:13,940
对我来说是大事

86
00:03:14,700 --> 00:03:16,420
不过不用担心

87
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,650
我会想办法挺过去的

88
00:03:21,900 --> 00:03:22,780
哦 天哪

89
00:03:23,410 --> 00:03:24,810
Jason就是以这个视角看世界的

90
00:03:25,030 --> 00:03:26,720
等一下 Jason就是那条什么都操的狗

91
00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:27,920
对 他就是这么死的

92
00:03:28,210 --> 00:03:29,850
他本想上我的一双雪地靴

93
00:03:30,120 --> 00:03:31,650
然后他的小心脏没承受住

94
00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:33,780
- 他都还没射呢  - 真恶心

95
00:03:34,010 --> 00:03:36,640
总之 我们要去四街的那家运动用品商店去跟线索

96
00:03:37,410 --> 00:03:38,270
你也该向前看了

97
00:03:38,410 --> 00:03:39,320
Jackson会是这么希望的

98
00:03:39,410 --> 00:03:40,920
- 他叫Jason  - 无所谓 小伙计

99
00:03:42,100 --> 00:03:42,560
99分局

100
00:03:42,560 --> 00:03:43,320
警监 谢谢你来见我
99分局

101
00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:45,070
警监 谢谢你来见我

102
00:03:45,140 --> 00:03:46,560
让你周六加班了 真是不好意思

103
00:03:46,630 --> 00:03:47,870
别这么说 反正我很闲

104
00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:49,030
Kevin还在巴黎

105
00:03:49,030 --> 00:03:49,500
是吗

106
00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:51,700
我都不记得了呢

107
00:03:52,030 --> 00:03:54,160
总之 这就是Garibaldi销声匿迹后

108
00:03:54,230 --> 00:03:56,160
我们在他公寓找到的全部东西了

109
00:03:56,340 --> 00:03:57,500
告诉我你有什么发现

110
00:03:57,980 --> 00:04:00,250
这个人在每张照片里都出现过

111
00:04:00,650 --> 00:04:01,780
Nick DiTullio

112
00:04:01,900 --> 00:04:03,320
我八年前就带他去问过话

113
00:04:03,380 --> 00:04:04,650
但他什么都不肯说

114
00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:06,070
你知道的 俗话说的好

115
00:04:06,300 --> 00:04:09,010
"时间会让每个男人开口的

116
00:04:09,030 --> 00:04:10,500
特别是关于他邻居的真相"

117
00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:12,180
真有这么个俗语的 就别计较这个了

118
00:04:12,210 --> 00:04:14,520
重点是 他肯定会告诉我们Garibaldi的下落

119
00:04:14,630 --> 00:04:16,760
我不知道Garibaldi在哪

120
00:04:16,810 --> 00:04:17,900
我们走得并不近

121
00:04:18,010 --> 00:04:19,360
我只是他的健身教练而已

122
00:04:19,450 --> 00:04:21,230
那你们为什么经常一起去吃饭

123
00:04:21,340 --> 00:04:24,250
- 吃意大利面也算健身吗  - 问得好

124
00:04:24,270 --> 00:04:26,470
拒绝Garibaldi是不可能的 明白吗

125
00:04:26,470 --> 00:04:28,340
所以我只让他练胸肌和腹肌

126
00:04:28,360 --> 00:04:29,100
从不练腿部

127
00:04:29,180 --> 00:04:30,320
我懂 关键在于平衡

128
00:04:30,410 --> 00:04:32,010
所以我从来不练肌肉

129
00:04:32,180 --> 00:04:33,610
如果你们不是来逮捕我的话 我得先走了

130
00:04:33,630 --> 00:04:34,810
健身房那边出了些紧急情况

131
00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:39,140
两个警察来问话 健身房正好出现紧急情况

132
00:04:39,470 --> 00:04:41,300
看上去很可疑 我们应该跟踪他

133
00:04:41,360 --> 00:04:43,900
是啊 这案子还真出现了线索

134
00:04:44,030 --> 00:04:45,110
你为什么这么惊讶

135
00:04:45,540 --> 00:04:49,520
因为这份工作每天都充满惊奇

136
00:04:51,900 --> 00:04:53,120
不能更同意了

137
00:05:04,670 --> 00:05:07,100
医学检测员 我们中奖了

138
00:05:07,180 --> 00:05:08,870
那健身房里肯定全是尸体

139
00:05:09,010 --> 00:05:10,610
- 这是卫生部  - 哦 天哪

140
00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:12,210
最近很流行腮腺炎

141
00:05:12,470 --> 00:05:15,010
腮腺炎 这词太搞笑了

142
00:05:15,100 --> 00:05:18,070
这其实是一个很容易传染的重病

143
00:05:18,230 --> 00:05:19,100
但我们不会被传染的

144
00:05:19,120 --> 00:05:21,520
我们也就和那人接触了几秒钟

145
00:05:21,630 --> 00:05:23,250
而且 他也没舔我们眼球

146
00:05:23,830 --> 00:05:25,340
你们恐怕都得了腮腺炎

147
00:05:25,380 --> 00:05:27,850
腮腺炎 听起来还是很搞笑

148
00:05:28,780 --> 00:05:30,250
我们不会死吧

149
00:05:32,140 --> 00:05:33,850
所以 你们都得了腮腺炎

150
00:05:33,870 --> 00:05:35,700
我很抱歉 这病传染性很强

151
00:05:36,120 --> 00:05:37,760
警探 你可能不想呆在这里

152
00:05:37,850 --> 00:05:38,830
哦 没关系的

153
00:05:38,860 --> 00:05:40,720
我定期打疫苗

154
00:05:41,070 --> 00:05:43,140
我对很多你们听都没听过的病免疫呢

155
00:05:43,140 --> 00:05:44,980
除了爱吹牛的病

156
00:05:45,980 --> 00:05:47,720
总之 接下来的几个小时内

157
00:05:47,780 --> 00:05:50,670
你们很可能会有发烧 疼痛 疲劳的症状

158
00:05:50,700 --> 00:05:51,520
这不算什么

159
00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:53,630
还有 酸性食物会带来严重的下颚疼痛

160
00:05:53,700 --> 00:05:55,470
所以你们最好别吃酸的糖果

161
00:05:55,560 --> 00:05:56,180
什么

162
00:05:56,270 --> 00:05:58,180
否则脖子上可能会长甲状腺肿块 很疼

163
00:05:58,210 --> 00:06:00,870
另外 还可能发生睾丸部位的不适

164
00:06:01,820 --> 00:06:03,140
- 好吧  - 懂了

165
00:06:03,180 --> 00:06:04,760
懂 懂 懂

166
00:06:04,760 --> 00:06:05,780
毫无疑问

167
00:06:05,780 --> 00:06:07,720
因为这病毒有极高的传染性

168
00:06:07,750 --> 00:06:10,810
接下来九天 你们两位将会在家进行隔离

169
00:06:11,070 --> 00:06:12,660
哦 孤独的九天

170
00:06:12,690 --> 00:06:14,980
警监 我很乐意去陪你

171
00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:18,380
是英国作家狄更斯所写的小说，被多次改编成影视剧作。

172
00:06:18,470 --> 00:06:20,920
我听说电影节奏又慢 时间又长

173
00:06:21,050 --> 00:06:22,580
我确实喜欢慢节奏时间长的电影

174
00:06:22,580 --> 00:06:24,040
但我不想成为累赘

175
00:06:24,320 --> 00:06:26,630
而且我越来越习惯独处了

176
00:06:27,100 --> 00:06:31,140
或者我们可以一起被隔离

177
00:06:31,210 --> 00:06:32,360
顺便把案子办了

178
00:06:32,850 --> 00:06:35,470
好啊 这听上去有点意思

179
00:06:35,540 --> 00:06:36,210
只是"有点"意思吗

180
00:06:36,300 --> 00:06:37,920
这将是爽翻天的一周

181
00:06:38,010 --> 00:06:39,420
不好意思 你们没听到我之前提到的

182
00:06:39,450 --> 00:06:41,430
"睾丸部位的极度不适"吗

183
00:06:41,470 --> 00:06:43,630
我们听到了 "坏消息"医生

184
00:06:44,270 --> 00:06:46,470
我和Holt警监刚通了话

185
00:06:46,540 --> 00:06:48,060
他和Jake都得了腮腺炎

186
00:06:48,270 --> 00:06:50,000
在Holt康复之前我全权负责

187
00:06:50,030 --> 00:06:53,160
好事啊 你想知道自己是否能成为一个优秀的警监

188
00:06:53,230 --> 00:06:54,740
这就是你发光发亮的机会

189
00:06:54,830 --> 00:06:56,630
你就是那个漂亮的小替角

190
00:06:56,630 --> 00:06:58,160
而那个老去的主角

191
00:06:58,210 --> 00:07:00,270
她刚从楼梯上摔了下去

192
00:07:00,500 --> 00:07:03,710
现在你要做的是挥着你的翅膀

193
00:07:03,760 --> 00:07:05,300
飞翔

194
00:07:05,660 --> 00:07:07,210
接下来两周

195
00:07:07,270 --> 00:07:09,100
Holt警监要休病假

196
00:07:09,180 --> 00:07:11,360
警监一职由我代理

197
00:07:11,400 --> 00:07:13,540
我们是您忠诚的臣民

198
00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:14,900
请继续

199
00:07:14,940 --> 00:07:17,180
我希望大家不仅做好本职工作

200
00:07:17,180 --> 00:07:19,700
也要清理证据室

201
00:07:19,830 --> 00:07:21,360
完善社区服务

202
00:07:21,410 --> 00:07:25,450
同时完成另外22项任务

203
00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:27,780
每完成一项打个勾

204
00:07:27,920 --> 00:07:29,210
就会听到铃声

205
00:07:29,250 --> 00:07:31,140
它象征着胜利

206
00:07:32,150 --> 00:07:34,250
你该再加条"修理铃铛"

207
00:07:34,540 --> 00:07:35,290
隔离期 第2天

208
00:07:35,290 --> 00:07:36,060
- 早上好 警监  - Peralta
隔离期 第2天

209
00:07:36,060 --> 00:07:37,360
- 早上好 警监  - Peralta

210
00:07:37,360 --> 00:07:39,320
我想给你介绍个人

211
00:07:42,030 --> 00:07:44,650
他叫Simon 我恨死他了

212
00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:45,740
你好 Simon

213
00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:48,660
这是Balthazar

214
00:07:48,700 --> 00:07:51,200
他是个往我喉咙里喷火的恶魔

215
00:07:51,230 --> 00:07:52,330
甲状腺肿了吧

216
00:07:52,370 --> 00:07:53,770
随你说啦

217
00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:55,920
我把这些餐厅照片都看了一遍

218
00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:58,310
确定了其他几个已知的犯罪团伙

219
00:07:58,340 --> 00:08:01,120
怎么了 你发现了什么

220
00:08:01,140 --> 00:08:03,040
没 我就是突然好冷打了个颤

221
00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:05,750
现在全身火烧火燎的

222
00:08:05,780 --> 00:08:08,250
腮腺炎讨厌死了

223
00:08:08,290 --> 00:08:12,700
我还在其他几张照片里注意到有辆货车停在餐厅前面

224
00:08:12,830 --> 00:08:13,920
我怎么没注意到

225
00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:15,590
这家餐厅肯定被监视了

226
00:08:15,630 --> 00:08:16,700
我估计是政府的人

227
00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:17,670
你说得对

228
00:08:17,720 --> 00:08:19,070
我去联系局里认识的人

229
00:08:19,070 --> 00:08:20,250
看看能不能拿到点录像

230
00:08:20,430 --> 00:08:20,980
好主意

231
00:08:21,010 --> 00:08:22,260
哦对 虽然知道不可以

232
00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:23,930
但是我好想戳戳自己的腮腺炎

233
00:08:23,970 --> 00:08:25,340
- 别想了  - 我要戳了

234
00:08:25,340 --> 00:08:26,160
要戳了

235
00:08:27,410 --> 00:08:28,410
痛死了

236
00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:30,580
真没想到会这么疼

237
00:08:31,810 --> 00:08:32,970
有点儿晕

238
00:08:34,040 --> 00:08:36,230
嘿 你终于爬起来了

239
00:08:36,230 --> 00:08:37,050
是啊

240
00:08:37,160 --> 00:08:38,580
就像我爸以前常说的

241
00:08:38,620 --> 00:08:40,030
"是男人就别哭

242
00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:41,920
超过三天"

243
00:08:41,940 --> 00:08:43,820
所以我决定重振旗鼓回来工作

244
00:08:43,850 --> 00:08:45,830
不错 你把目击证词都看过了吗

245
00:08:45,850 --> 00:08:47,420
什么 没有

246
00:08:47,460 --> 00:08:50,360
"工作"是指制作Jason的纪念视频

247
00:08:50,390 --> 00:08:51,960
- 你认真的吗  - 当然

248
00:08:52,180 --> 00:08:53,540
给你看我做好的

249
00:08:54,330 --> 00:09:00,500
Michael Bolton

250
00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:06,640
*我已经爱了你这么久*

251
00:09:06,640 --> 00:09:07,890
永远想念你
*我已经爱了你这么久*

252
00:09:07,890 --> 00:09:08,420
永远想念你

253
00:09:08,450 --> 00:09:10,680
喂 有好多事要做呢

254
00:09:10,710 --> 00:09:13,100
集中注意力 别再看搞笑的小狗视频了

255
00:09:15,620 --> 00:09:17,340
可能是我烧傻了

256
00:09:17,340 --> 00:09:19,870
但是这家意大利餐厅八年前未剪辑的镜头

257
00:09:19,920 --> 00:09:22,290
可能是我看过的最棒的电影了

258
00:09:22,330 --> 00:09:23,830
还有 用叉子多怪啊

259
00:09:23,860 --> 00:09:26,760
叉子是很诡异 我一直这么觉得

260
00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:30,370
没错没错 我们是不是感冒药吃多了

261
00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:31,600
怎么可能

262
00:09:31,640 --> 00:09:33,570
Balthazar可是个饥渴的小贱人

263
00:09:33,600 --> 00:09:35,600
为你这句喝一杯

264
00:09:38,140 --> 00:09:39,120
等等 看啊

265
00:09:41,240 --> 00:09:42,920
是Garkabargo

266
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:46,450
抱歉 没 没法儿说话

267
00:09:46,480 --> 00:09:47,850
要次药

268
00:09:50,420 --> 00:09:51,610
是Garibaldi

269
00:09:52,490 --> 00:09:54,580
他在吃蛇啊

270
00:09:55,160 --> 00:09:57,050
不对 是意面

271
00:09:57,740 --> 00:09:59,460
永远都在吃意面

272
00:09:59,630 --> 00:10:03,430
我就说 如果是意面 那也长得太像蛇了

273
00:10:04,730 --> 00:10:06,100
太棒了 99

274
00:10:06,140 --> 00:10:08,070
胜利的铃声欣然响起

275
00:10:08,110 --> 00:10:10,810
我们完成了清单里的一个任务

276
00:10:10,810 --> 00:10:13,520
我的天 Terry 太棒了

277
00:10:13,560 --> 00:10:14,380
是哪一项

278
00:10:14,410 --> 00:10:16,240
- 修理铃铛  - 好的吧

279
00:10:16,280 --> 00:10:18,830
有点小失望 但总算完成一项了

280
00:10:18,850 --> 00:10:20,450
接下来你会一直听到这铃声的

281
00:10:20,610 --> 00:10:23,950
- 放开她 你这野兽  - 给我

282
00:10:23,990 --> 00:10:25,650
你们他妈在干嘛

283
00:10:25,690 --> 00:10:27,300
Hitchcock想偷我的三明治

284
00:10:27,340 --> 00:10:28,520
才怪 我俩都点了肉球三明治

285
00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:29,810
但是只送来了一个

286
00:10:29,810 --> 00:10:30,540
是我的

287
00:10:30,560 --> 00:10:34,000
同志们 听着 走去三明治店

288
00:10:34,030 --> 00:10:36,700
一条街的事儿 再买个三明治

289
00:10:36,730 --> 00:10:38,900
- 走去  - 疯了吗你

290
00:10:38,940 --> 00:10:40,960
那好吧 切两半总行了吧

291
00:10:41,010 --> 00:10:43,570
然后呢 机灵鬼 我们一人吃6英寸三明治

292
00:10:43,610 --> 00:10:45,250
和两个半肉球

293
00:10:45,250 --> 00:10:47,230
- 你当我们小孩儿吗  - 你以为自己在俄罗斯吗

294
00:10:47,250 --> 00:10:49,040
够了 都不许吃

295
00:10:49,080 --> 00:10:50,950
回去工作

296
00:10:53,620 --> 00:10:54,220
隔离期 第5天

297
00:10:54,220 --> 00:10:55,160
等下
隔离期 第5天

298
00:10:55,390 --> 00:10:56,820
为什么他去了厨房

299
00:10:56,850 --> 00:10:57,920
我们在厨房也有眼线吗

300
00:10:57,950 --> 00:10:59,520
到处都有眼线

301
00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:02,060
卧 槽 疼 死 了

302
00:11:02,090 --> 00:11:04,430
看 他偷偷塞给大厨一张纸条

303
00:11:04,460 --> 00:11:06,300
我猜上面就是他的藏匿地点了

304
00:11:06,300 --> 00:11:07,630
大厨知道他藏在哪儿

305
00:11:07,660 --> 00:11:10,270
大厨叫Richie Lignardi

306
00:11:10,300 --> 00:11:12,370
找到他 就能找到Garibaldi

307
00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:14,580
我们现在就出发

308
00:11:15,610 --> 00:11:16,470
出什么发

309
00:11:16,510 --> 00:11:17,770
天 你脸上是什么

310
00:11:17,810 --> 00:11:21,780
哦对 恶心的畸形肿块

311
00:11:22,180 --> 00:11:23,940
那我这样

312
00:11:24,450 --> 00:11:26,310
嘿 你好吗 大妹子

313
00:11:26,540 --> 00:11:27,320
有没有好一点

314
00:11:27,350 --> 00:11:28,680
没差啦

315
00:11:28,720 --> 00:11:31,210
我们准备去找线人

316
00:11:31,230 --> 00:11:32,960
他知道Garibaldi藏在哪儿

317
00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:34,220
你们还在隔离期啊

318
00:11:34,430 --> 00:11:36,340
不能像两座腮腺炎喷泉一样

319
00:11:36,340 --> 00:11:37,720
把腮腺炎喷得到处都是啊

320
00:11:37,870 --> 00:11:39,290
这样是肯定不行的

321
00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:49,570
停 你们不能走

322
00:11:49,610 --> 00:11:51,210
阻止得了你就试试呗

323
00:11:51,580 --> 00:11:53,430
你抓不到我们哒

324
00:11:54,840 --> 00:11:56,780
Usain Bolt 奥运会男子100米和200米记录保持者

325
00:11:56,810 --> 00:11:58,610
这就是你们要找的纸条吗

326
00:11:58,650 --> 00:12:00,080
你找到地址啦

327
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,980
没有 这是烤通心粉的菜谱

328
00:12:03,020 --> 00:12:05,390
一直贴在你墙上的啊

329
00:12:05,420 --> 00:12:07,380
你们太虚弱了 病得不轻

330
00:12:07,410 --> 00:12:08,980
肯定是破不了案的

331
00:12:09,030 --> 00:12:10,190
都给我回去

332
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:13,210
办不到 腿动不了了

333
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:16,030
啊 我的蛋蛋

334
00:12:16,430 --> 00:12:18,210
腮腺炎扩散到蛋蛋了

335
00:12:19,790 --> 00:12:22,630
好了 把毫无用处

336
00:12:22,630 --> 00:12:24,750
还带着传染源的外套脱了 休息一下

337
00:12:24,750 --> 00:12:25,890
胡扯 Santiago

338
00:12:25,920 --> 00:12:28,220
我们得勒紧裤腰 努力工作

339
00:12:28,260 --> 00:12:29,860
只是受了点小挫折

340
00:12:29,890 --> 00:12:32,430
更像受了点腮腺炎

341
00:12:37,030 --> 00:12:38,330
疼得厉害吧

342
00:12:38,370 --> 00:12:40,370
Jake 能跟你私聊一下吗

343
00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:44,440
当然 我拿条围巾 把肿块挡挡

344
00:12:44,470 --> 00:12:45,510
好

345
00:12:45,540 --> 00:12:47,170
听着 情况是这样的

346
00:12:47,210 --> 00:12:49,240
我发高烧了 控制不了身体

347
00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:50,740
你想对我做什么都行

348
00:12:50,780 --> 00:12:53,050
但是 别碰我的嘴 脖子 和蛋蛋

349
00:12:54,550 --> 00:12:56,420
你完全误会我的意思了

350
00:12:56,450 --> 00:12:57,720
感谢上帝

351
00:12:57,750 --> 00:12:59,820
Jake 放弃这个案子吧

352
00:12:59,860 --> 00:13:00,920
说什么呢你

353
00:13:00,960 --> 00:13:01,920
我们的计划实施得很完美

354
00:13:01,940 --> 00:13:03,030
Holt这一周都没闲着

355
00:13:03,070 --> 00:13:05,160
没错 因为他忙得快挂了

356
00:13:05,190 --> 00:13:07,660
- 你看他  - 怎么了

357
00:13:07,700 --> 00:13:09,530
他像的主角一样

358
00:13:10,030 --> 00:13:11,470
因为他是天才啊

359
00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:14,070
他在不停地写"案子"这俩字

360
00:13:14,100 --> 00:13:16,370
糟了 他开始写"安子"了

361
00:13:16,410 --> 00:13:17,610
难道不是这么写的吗

362
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:20,270
都说了 我烧得嘴 脖子和蛋蛋都要融化了

363
00:13:20,310 --> 00:13:21,070
- Jake  - 怎么

364
00:13:21,120 --> 00:13:22,070
到此为止

365
00:13:22,100 --> 00:13:24,380
放弃这个蠢逼无聊的旧案子

366
00:13:24,410 --> 00:13:26,880
否则要么你们死 要么我就杀了你

367
00:13:30,650 --> 00:13:32,550
我天 我还以为自己跟上她的思维了呢

368
00:13:32,590 --> 00:13:34,390
好吧 我还是躺下吧

369
00:13:34,420 --> 00:13:35,340
我 躺

370
00:13:37,290 --> 00:13:38,360
案子

371
00:13:42,870 --> 00:13:43,760
你在干什么

372
00:13:43,800 --> 00:13:46,700
把Jason的项圈密封在袋子里

373
00:13:46,810 --> 00:13:48,140
这样就能留住他的气味

374
00:13:48,170 --> 00:13:50,000
不知道我还剩多少味道能闻了

375
00:13:50,300 --> 00:13:51,430
吃惊

376
00:13:52,310 --> 00:13:54,010
我知道那条狗对你来说很重要

377
00:13:54,040 --> 00:13:55,070
所以我给你带了这个

378
00:13:58,220 --> 00:13:59,320
一只狗

379
00:13:59,650 --> 00:14:01,290
他叫Arlo 但是你也可以叫他Jason二号

380
00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:02,320
或者其他名字

381
00:14:02,360 --> 00:14:03,210
认真的

382
00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,790
我不能就这么随便地用另一只狗来代替Jason

383
00:14:05,830 --> 00:14:07,830
为什么 基本上所有狗都一样

384
00:14:07,860 --> 00:14:10,100
看好了 Arlo 快去干那个玩具

385
00:14:10,500 --> 00:14:11,830
别碰它

386
00:14:11,870 --> 00:14:12,700
那是Jason的

387
00:14:13,500 --> 00:14:15,810
听着 伙计 我已经很耐心了

388
00:14:15,810 --> 00:14:17,270
我们有个案子要查

389
00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:19,440
是时候忘了这件事朝前看了

390
00:14:19,470 --> 00:14:21,630
朝前看 朝前看

391
00:14:22,080 --> 00:14:24,120
Jason是我家的一份子 Rosa

392
00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:25,050
我爱他

393
00:14:25,510 --> 00:14:28,280
他发情是唯一能让我撑过离婚的动力

394
00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:30,500
看见他那么开心我就觉得

395
00:14:30,540 --> 00:14:32,340
也许有一天我也能那么开心

396
00:14:33,550 --> 00:14:34,620
你不会明白这种感受的

397
00:14:34,660 --> 00:14:37,000
因为你有摩托车头盔来抵御真心

398
00:14:37,060 --> 00:14:38,990
但我需要感受这份悲伤

399
00:14:39,030 --> 00:14:42,430
所以我现在唯一要离开向前看的就是你

400
00:14:47,570 --> 00:14:49,570
所以 我好像 有了一只狗

401
00:14:51,040 --> 00:14:53,320
嘿 那些文件看得怎么样了

402
00:14:53,340 --> 00:14:54,570
我们没在研究那些

403
00:14:54,610 --> 00:14:56,410
- 我们在罢工  - 绝食抗议

404
00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:58,940
- 可你在吃薯片  - 薯片不算数

405
00:14:58,980 --> 00:15:01,410
我的医生说薯片一点营养价值都没有

406
00:15:01,450 --> 00:15:02,880
我们要肉丸三明治

407
00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:04,500
你没有权利拿走我们的食物

408
00:15:05,020 --> 00:15:06,320
气死我吧

409
00:15:06,350 --> 00:15:09,320
我会整理好这些文件 教危险品的课程

410
00:15:09,360 --> 00:15:11,620
我会把所有人的活儿都干了 因为很明显

411
00:15:11,660 --> 00:15:14,090
我是唯一一个能让这个分局凝聚在一起的人

412
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:25,740
呃 我觉得你关门太用力了

413
00:15:27,340 --> 00:15:29,140
我找到了雪糕

414
00:15:29,180 --> 00:15:30,760
这应该能帮我们降温

415
00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:36,250
谢啦 Jake

416
00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:37,750
不客气 蛋蛋君

417
00:15:37,780 --> 00:15:40,180
Peralta Balthzar有个姐妹

418
00:15:40,220 --> 00:15:42,650
叫做Penelope

419
00:15:42,650 --> 00:15:45,100
哈哈 你两边都肿了

420
00:15:45,140 --> 00:15:47,100
不要在意细节 我们赶紧开始工作

421
00:15:47,140 --> 00:15:49,870
或者我们也可以睡个五到七天

422
00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:50,560
然后看看感觉如何

423
00:15:50,580 --> 00:15:52,560
正义得到伸张之前我不会休息的

424
00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:53,600
别浪费时间了

425
00:15:53,630 --> 00:15:55,000
这个案子非常紧急

426
00:15:55,650 --> 00:15:56,800
天

427
00:15:57,100 --> 00:15:58,240
好吧 听好了

428
00:15:58,270 --> 00:16:02,470
这个案子其实没我们开始想的那么紧急

429
00:16:02,840 --> 00:16:03,870
嗯

430
00:16:04,710 --> 00:16:06,640
这是我从桌上挖出来

431
00:16:06,680 --> 00:16:08,850
让你在周末有些事做的 因为你看起来非常孤单

432
00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:11,870
你听说Garibaldi卷土重来了

433
00:16:12,020 --> 00:16:13,280
确实 没错 就是这样

434
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:16,650
但那些可能只是胡说八道

435
00:16:17,190 --> 00:16:18,810
所以你骗了我

436
00:16:19,790 --> 00:16:20,890
出于同情 你同情我

437
00:16:20,930 --> 00:16:21,890
话不是这么说的

438
00:16:21,930 --> 00:16:22,700
我就是这么觉得的

439
00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:24,630
我受到了冒犯 我很生气

440
00:16:24,660 --> 00:16:26,230
我觉得很累

441
00:16:26,270 --> 00:16:28,430
所以我要睡一觉 但当我醒来

442
00:16:28,470 --> 00:16:31,370
你要为此付出代价

443
00:16:31,660 --> 00:16:33,000
4小时后

444
00:16:33,370 --> 00:16:35,410
你怎么敢

445
00:16:35,440 --> 00:16:37,010
我怎么敢

446
00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:38,830
你怎么敢

447
00:16:39,310 --> 00:16:40,750
我只是想要帮忙

448
00:16:40,780 --> 00:16:42,880
你的帮助感觉太像同情了

449
00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:46,180
所以帮帮忙 别再帮我了

450
00:16:46,220 --> 00:16:48,390
哇 你好像不在意我帮你

451
00:16:48,420 --> 00:16:51,160
找回你在99分局的工作

452
00:16:51,190 --> 00:16:54,340
我又没要你帮忙

453
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:59,250
你说我们没有豆子了 你这个偷豆子的猪

454
00:16:59,300 --> 00:17:00,720
- 你才是偷豆子的猪  - 你才是偷豆子的猪

455
00:17:00,830 --> 00:17:02,530
- 不 你是  - 你收回那句话

456
00:17:02,570 --> 00:17:04,720
你

457
00:17:05,640 --> 00:17:06,600
双重攻击

458
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:17,980
希望你们都饿了

459
00:17:17,980 --> 00:17:19,380
我做了烤通心粉

460
00:17:19,610 --> 00:17:23,920
我觉得用Garibaldi的菜谱会很有意思呢

461
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,560
太棒了 出于同情的食物

462
00:17:25,950 --> 00:17:28,150
不管怎样谢谢你 但是我自己可以做饭

463
00:17:28,180 --> 00:17:30,920
如果不是因为那样脑子会疼的话

464
00:17:30,950 --> 00:17:32,120
我早就在翻白眼了

465
00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:34,620
好了警监 别闹脾气了

466
00:17:34,660 --> 00:17:35,820
我知道你的自尊受到了伤害

467
00:17:35,920 --> 00:17:37,860
但从来没有人同情你

468
00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:39,900
我们只是想在你不开心的时候帮助你

469
00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:42,060
因为那就是人们在关心彼此的时候会做的事

470
00:17:42,120 --> 00:17:43,280
他们会向彼此撒谎

471
00:17:43,360 --> 00:17:46,010
并无中生有出一些急需解决的案子吗

472
00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:48,770
是找点在一起的理由

473
00:17:48,810 --> 00:17:52,140
就像问答之夜或者民间艺术节

474
00:17:52,180 --> 00:17:55,180
还有和他们腮腺炎小伙伴Jake一起调查积灰的案子

475
00:17:55,210 --> 00:17:56,880
你继续 Amy 我们干得不错

476
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:59,150
你把通心粉吃了 你会喜欢它的

477
00:17:59,180 --> 00:18:00,580
然后你给我赶紧成熟起来

478
00:18:02,300 --> 00:18:04,360
好吧 你是对的

479
00:18:06,020 --> 00:18:07,250
我为我的行为感到抱歉

480
00:18:08,790 --> 00:18:10,330
我迫不及待要尝尝你的手艺了

481
00:18:13,470 --> 00:18:15,520
这难吃得要吐了

482
00:18:15,810 --> 00:18:18,120
你还是什么都没有学到吗

483
00:18:19,470 --> 00:18:20,870
天哪

484
00:18:20,900 --> 00:18:23,040
这比腮腺炎还恐怖 Amy

485
00:18:23,070 --> 00:18:24,140
什么鬼

486
00:18:24,170 --> 00:18:26,470
我完全按照Garibaldi的食谱做的

487
00:18:26,510 --> 00:18:27,450
我知道我不是个好厨子

488
00:18:27,450 --> 00:18:29,070
但是我超爱听从指示的

489
00:18:29,250 --> 00:18:30,760
七杯盐

490
00:18:30,780 --> 00:18:32,280
就算是我也知道这不会是张菜谱了

491
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:33,920
也就是说这可能是份密码

492
00:18:33,950 --> 00:18:35,820
有意思

493
00:18:35,850 --> 00:18:38,220
十位数 这可能是个电话号码

494
00:18:38,250 --> 00:18:40,410
看 718 布鲁克林区号

495
00:18:40,450 --> 00:18:42,320
没错 一定是这样

496
00:18:42,360 --> 00:18:44,760
等等 你真的加了这么多盐

497
00:18:44,790 --> 00:18:46,740
还有18杯牛至

498
00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:48,140
你别管 我破了案子

499
00:18:48,320 --> 00:18:49,660
9个洋葱

500
00:18:49,700 --> 00:18:51,100
哦 Amy

501
00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:52,610
我怎么就成坏人了

502
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:55,060
99分局

503
00:18:55,310 --> 00:18:57,910
好吧好吧 这看起来不错

504
00:18:57,940 --> 00:18:59,850
我都看不出来这里曾经被绿巨人毁灭过一次了

505
00:18:59,900 --> 00:19:01,910
是啊 但是我主管了两周

506
00:19:01,950 --> 00:19:04,180
却一个目标都没有完成

507
00:19:04,210 --> 00:19:06,380
你让Hitchcock和Scully停止绝食抗议了

508
00:19:06,380 --> 00:19:08,280
我只是把一把爆米花扔到了地上

509
00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:09,580
一点都不难

510
00:19:09,620 --> 00:19:11,160
是啊 他们就像动物一样

511
00:19:11,520 --> 00:19:14,420
你知道为什么神奇的Holt警监

512
00:19:14,460 --> 00:19:16,390
从来没能清理好证据室

513
00:19:16,430 --> 00:19:17,690
或者完成你列表上的任何事吗

514
00:19:17,730 --> 00:19:18,410
为什么

515
00:19:18,430 --> 00:19:20,960
因为他总在处理同事之间的摩擦

516
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:22,340
这就是警监的工作

517
00:19:22,870 --> 00:19:25,040
你和Holt的唯一区别就是

518
00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:28,720
他没有你这样的神力 关个门就能让一间房散架

519
00:19:29,060 --> 00:19:30,050
谢谢 Gina

520
00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:32,120
你不用感谢我

521
00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:35,510
我所做的只是做那个唯一相信你的人

522
00:19:35,550 --> 00:19:36,910
别靠着门

523
00:19:36,950 --> 00:19:38,380
Terry造成了结构损伤

524
00:19:39,520 --> 00:19:40,920
天哪 你太壮了

525
00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:45,820
去简报室 现在

526
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:49,340
我真的不想再被你教训了

527
00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:51,870
这是什么

528
00:19:52,010 --> 00:19:53,760
这是Jason的葬礼

529
00:19:54,210 --> 00:19:55,340
我有些话想说

530
00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:03,140
当七天前Jason去世的时候 我一丁点儿都不在乎

531
00:20:03,540 --> 00:20:04,320
这就是你的发言

532
00:20:04,340 --> 00:20:06,920
因为我不懂为什么人们这么在乎他们蠢兮兮的狗

533
00:20:07,460 --> 00:20:09,080
直到我自己有了一只狗

534
00:20:12,140 --> 00:20:13,820
我只养了Arlo一天半

535
00:20:13,850 --> 00:20:14,980
但如果他出了任何事

536
00:20:15,020 --> 00:20:17,390
我会杀了这个房间里的所有人然后自杀

537
00:20:17,420 --> 00:20:19,890
非常暴力的颂词 我喜欢

538
00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:21,290
Charles 我很抱歉

539
00:20:21,320 --> 00:20:22,660
你不需要尽快跨过这道坎

540
00:20:23,210 --> 00:20:24,300
尽情沉浸在悲伤吧

541
00:20:24,470 --> 00:20:25,810
Scully 就现在

542
00:20:31,720 --> 00:20:32,720
好的 谢谢你

543
00:20:32,870 --> 00:20:35,170
好消息 Garibaldi的手机号还在使用

544
00:20:35,210 --> 00:20:36,270
所以他们能够找出他的位置

545
00:20:36,340 --> 00:20:38,810
特警刚刚抓住了他 就是这样

546
00:20:38,840 --> 00:20:40,210
是啊 就是这样

547
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:43,180
完美的时间 我们的隔离期终于结束了

548
00:20:43,230 --> 00:20:44,280
甲状腺肿块也终于消了

549
00:20:44,310 --> 00:20:45,120
是啊 没错

550
00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:47,840
我们可以出门去 想舔谁的眼珠就舔谁的眼珠

551
00:20:48,070 --> 00:20:49,980
不太对 没人有这个权力

552
00:20:50,020 --> 00:20:50,740
好吧 你是对的

553
00:20:50,810 --> 00:20:53,350
不管怎样 我出去了

554
00:20:53,390 --> 00:20:54,620
等一等

555
00:20:57,430 --> 00:20:58,560
我很抱歉之前冲你吼叫

556
00:20:59,250 --> 00:21:02,600
我太骄傲了 所以我不想承认我很孤单

557
00:21:02,630 --> 00:21:05,170
所以谢谢你

558
00:21:05,200 --> 00:21:06,010
不用客气

559
00:21:06,570 --> 00:21:07,560
不算事儿

560
00:21:07,650 --> 00:21:09,970
不 这算事儿 更算事儿的是你

561
00:21:10,010 --> 00:21:11,500
让我回到了99分局

562
00:21:11,770 --> 00:21:14,050
我会永远感激这件事的

563
00:21:14,250 --> 00:21:16,560
所以这个

564
00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:20,030
这是给你的

565
00:21:20,580 --> 00:21:23,850
酸糖果 我想死你们了

566
00:21:25,340 --> 00:21:26,780
疼死我了

567
00:21:27,650 --> 00:21:29,780
多谢你的礼物