1
00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:45,760
大家準備好了沒有

2
00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:49,080
你們要知道這次的任務非常的艱巨

3
00:01:49,280 --> 00:01:50,840
我們隨時要作出犧牲

4
00:01:51,280 --> 00:01:51,800
是

5
00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:54,600
好, 現在是上午九點四十七分

6
00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:56,800
我們要盡快完成任務, 出發

7
00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:01,880
媽媽

8
00:02:02,640 --> 00:02:03,320
你跑不了的

9
00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:04,400
別跑

10
00:02:04,680 --> 00:02:08,200
女兒, 你看在媽媽十月懷胎<br/>把你生下來的份上, 你放過我吧

11
00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:09,880
不可以

12
00:02:10,240 --> 00:02:12,080
做人要心狠手辣才能成功的

13
00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:13,400
抓她出去

14
00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:14,880
別跑…肥姨, 別跑

15
00:02:14,920 --> 00:02:15,400
走

16
00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:16,600
女兒, 不要呀, 女兒

17
00:02:17,200 --> 00:02:18,040
救命呀

18
00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:22,560
師父, 你在煮甚麼呢

19
00:02:28,120 --> 00:02:31,360
媽媽, 放心吧, 不會很痛的

20
00:02:32,120 --> 00:02:35,240
肥姨, 你要絕對相信我們<br/>放鬆自己

21
00:02:36,280 --> 00:02:38,840
肥姨, 我們都是為你好, 你要忍耐

22
00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:42,480
不要呀…我求求你們

23
00:02:42,560 --> 00:02:44,120
媽媽<br/>嚇死我了

24
00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:46,640
這個呼啦圈, 早午晚三次

25
00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:48,440
每次一百下

26
00:02:48,720 --> 00:02:51,040
一個星期, 你可以減五磅

27
00:02:53,280 --> 00:02:55,480
這裡啞鈴一對, 早午晚三次

28
00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:56,720
每次舉五十下

29
00:02:56,840 --> 00:02:58,480
一個星期可以減七磅

30
00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:01,560
這包減肥藥, 飽肚子吃的

31
00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:02,960
每四個鐘頭吃一次

32
00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,240
每個星期可以減三磅

33
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,320
原來是這樣子

34
00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:11,680
開飯了

35
00:03:11,920 --> 00:03:12,560
吃飯

36
00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:14,000
吃飯

37
00:03:14,080 --> 00:03:14,720
你的

38
00:03:14,760 --> 00:03:15,360
謝謝

39
00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:16,480
她的

40
00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:17,160
謝謝

41
00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:18,080
這是我的, 謝謝

42
00:03:18,920 --> 00:03:21,680
你們要我減肥連飯也不給我吃

43
00:03:22,120 --> 00:03:24,280
起碼煎兩條小紅腸給我吃嘛

44
00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:27,440
媽媽, 節食是減肥的第一步

45
00:03:28,200 --> 00:03:30,360
喝水呀, 來, 喝水會飽的

46
00:03:30,640 --> 00:03:31,240
錯

47
00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:35,680
肥姨, 你的食物<br/>我已經為你準備好了

48
00:03:36,320 --> 00:03:37,280
各位觀眾

49
00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:42,320
牛排…

50
00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:44,440
不錯, 就是牛排

51
00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:46,520
田味吉, 你攪和呀

52
00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:50,680
錯, 減肥不一定要不吃東西的

53
00:03:51,240 --> 00:03:53,880
只要改變烹調用的調味品

54
00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:56,080
同樣可以達到減肥的目的

55
00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:58,240
田師傅, 好棒呀

56
00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:00,080
你說那麼多話, 最中聽的就是這句

57
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:00,840
我吃東西了

58
00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:05,400
肥姨, 你每天的食譜<br/>我會為你準備好, 你只管吃吧

59
00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:06,160
謝謝

60
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:07,520
謝謝

61
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:13,000
師兄, 你最死相了<br/>你起來也不叫醒人家

62
00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,120
弄東西吃呀？有沒有我的份

63
00:04:15,560 --> 00:04:17,960
當然沒有了<br/>我等你一來就可以走了

64
00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:19,560
我們去看電影還是吃飯

65
00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:23,120
買機票去法國拜師父, 你就知道玩

66
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:25,720
怎麼了

67
00:04:26,360 --> 00:04:27,160
你怎麼了

68
00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:28,920
我肚子痛

69
00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:39,240
道具都差不多了

70
00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:42,800
差一點忘記了最重要的東西

71
00:04:50,440 --> 00:04:52,080
這次萬事俱備

72
00:04:53,280 --> 00:04:54,280
田味吉

73
00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:57,000
我看你跑不跑得出我的手掌心

74
00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:11,280
電視也不關跑到哪兒去了？爽爽

75
00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:13,840
她不在茶几上哪來那麼多東西

76
00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:17,320
你看看, 話梅、辣薑, 難道害喜呀

77
00:05:18,680 --> 00:05:19,680
害喜

78
00:05:19,840 --> 00:05:20,600
害喜呀

79
00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:22,320
真的假的

80
00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:24,800
一說就中, 我不學廚學看相了

81
00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:31,320
未婚懷孕並不是毫無出路

82
00:05:32,560 --> 00:05:34,040
我們了解你的需要

83
00:05:34,640 --> 00:05:37,120
隨時願意照顧你和你的孩子

84
00:05:38,480 --> 00:05:42,040
母親的抉擇, 諒解關懷未婚媽媽

85
00:05:42,920 --> 00:05:44,360
好邪門, 師父

86
00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:47,240
快關掉, 快去關掉

87
00:05:58,840 --> 00:05:59,480
爽爽

88
00:05:59,600 --> 00:06:00,280
師叔

89
00:06:00,520 --> 00:06:02,520
你怎麼了？爽爽

90
00:06:03,720 --> 00:06:05,080
師叔<br/>你應我, 爽爽

91
00:06:05,440 --> 00:06:07,160
師叔<br/>你在裡面幹甚麼？爽爽

92
00:06:09,640 --> 00:06:10,720
爽爽<br/>師叔

93
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:12,640
爽…

94
00:06:13,680 --> 00:06:14,560
你是怎麼了

95
00:06:14,720 --> 00:06:15,640
我沒力氣

96
00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:17,760
手怎麼這麼涼<br/>我全身沒力氣

97
00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:20,720
好, 我抱…我抱你下去

98
00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:23,600
你怎麼躲在廁所裡吃冰棒

99
00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:25,160
吃完冰棒把棒子扔掉嘛

100
00:06:25,320 --> 00:06:26,360
你還拿著晃來晃去幹嘛

101
00:06:26,440 --> 00:06:28,760
師父, 這枝不是冰棒的棒子<br/>其實這根就是…

102
00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:30,640
驗孕棒

103
00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:32,720
驗孕棒

104
00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:37,720
事到如今, 我用不著再瞞你們了

105
00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:40,440
我不跟你去法國

106
00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:43,080
不是因為我害怕坐飛機危險

107
00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:48,160
而是我怕小吉坐飛機有危險

108
00:06:48,880 --> 00:06:50,080
小吉

109
00:06:51,600 --> 00:06:53,200
師父, 恭喜你

110
00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:59,120
實在太過份了

111
00:07:01,200 --> 00:07:02,320
甚麼太過份

112
00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:06,280
我現在簡直像一個<br/>失去靈魂的軀殼似的

113
00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:08,800
你叫我下半輩子怎麼過

114
00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:12,400
甚麼怎麼過？大不了結婚好了

115
00:07:12,840 --> 00:07:13,680
結婚

116
00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:14,680
結婚

117
00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:17,080
你可不能在這個時候才反悔

118
00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:19,720
車你已經開了, 連輪胎也給磨平了

119
00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:21,080
現在要求退錢呀

120
00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:27,400
能像你跟津津那樣演場戲<br/>就可以解決了, 好呀, 我也想

121
00:07:29,320 --> 00:07:30,800
其實你用不著這麼悲觀

122
00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:34,080
結婚你又沒有結過<br/>怎麼知道結婚不好

123
00:07:34,360 --> 00:07:37,360
還有呀, 結了婚之後<br/>最起碼不用孤零零一個人了

124
00:07:37,680 --> 00:07:39,960
開心和不開心都有人跟你分享

125
00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:43,360
你說這種感覺是多麼的完美

126
00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:48,120
幹甚麼？你沒酒喝呀

127
00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:50,160
你這杯是啤酒

128
00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:52,440
我以為你喝的是迷魂酒, 那麼陶醉

129
00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:53,520
你管我

130
00:07:55,280 --> 00:07:57,240
柏高, 我們可以走了吧

131
00:07:57,920 --> 00:08:01,120
回家也約好一塊走<br/>果然是演戲演全套

132
00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:04,360
那當然, 我們演戲一定要演足<br/>要像真的一樣

133
00:08:05,640 --> 00:08:07,520
像真的一樣就結婚呀, 結婚吧

134
00:08:08,200 --> 00:08:10,000
你…你說甚麼？你別瞎說

135
00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:13,800
像你說的, 不用再孤零零的<br/>有甚麼開心不開心都有個人分享

136
00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:17,200
結婚啦…結婚<br/>好…算我怕你了, 我走了…

137
00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:17,960
走了

138
00:08:18,440 --> 00:08:19,080
怎麼<br/>拜拜

139
00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:20,280
兩個人一塊走

140
00:08:21,680 --> 00:08:22,400
神經病

141
00:08:24,600 --> 00:08:26,000
人家雙雙對對

142
00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:28,960
我形單影隻

143
00:08:43,720 --> 00:08:47,160
我想, 我們兩個靠近一點比較好

144
00:08:48,240 --> 00:08:49,640
對…

145
00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:51,320
好一點

146
00:08:51,560 --> 00:08:53,600
好…好一點, 是自然很多

147
00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:57,000
不過不可能這麼巧會碰到我姑姑

148
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,920
要是能碰到, 六合彩也會中的

149
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:01,720
這倒是, 說不定還是頭獎呢<br/>我們哪有這麼幸運

150
00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:02,960
我也這麼想

151
00:09:04,760 --> 00:09:05,440
怎麼了

152
00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:07,120
頭獎呀

153
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:08,720
姑姑

154
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:16,160
原…原來不是

155
00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:17,600
怎麼這麼像

156
00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:21,040
是呀, 那…那我們…

157
00:09:21,480 --> 00:09:22,760
不如我們繼續這樣吧

158
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:26,280
因為我們不知道甚麼時候<br/>又會像剛才那樣中一次頭獎

159
00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:27,440
對不對

160
00:09:27,680 --> 00:09:29,760
那也對, 保險一點好

161
00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:31,520
對, 保險一點

162
00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:33,760
好一點<br/>我們走了

163
00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:38,320
電影很好看

164
00:09:38,640 --> 00:09:39,520
好看…

165
00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:43,360
爸爸、媽媽、姑姑, 我們回來了

166
00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:50,320
看樣子是暴風雨的前夕

167
00:09:51,080 --> 00:09:53,440
放心吧, 我們做好了防風措施

168
00:09:53,840 --> 00:09:54,600
放心

169
00:09:56,440 --> 00:09:58,200
怎麼你們好像被人家…

170
00:09:58,320 --> 00:10:00,040
點了穴似的

171
00:10:00,960 --> 00:10:02,520
我們不是被人點了穴

172
00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:04,360
而是讓人給騙了

173
00:10:06,240 --> 00:10:07,960
我們在圖書館裡找了三個鐘頭

174
00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:10,280
終於讓我找到這本一年前的雜誌

175
00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:11,680
我看你們怎麼辦

176
00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:13,880
津津

177
00:10:14,600 --> 00:10:15,600
你到底搞甚麼鬼

178
00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:18,440
阿齊怎麼又變成喬柏高啦

179
00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:22,200
就是嘛, 你們不是一年前<br/>已經結了婚嗎

180
00:10:22,800 --> 00:10:26,160
他為甚麼是甚麼飲食界的<br/>鑽石王老五

181
00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:29,520
阿…阿齊…他是喬柏高

182
00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:32,200
事到如今<br/>不…不如就由我跟他們說清楚吧

183
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,280
其實…<br/>住嘴

184
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:36,280
事到如今

185
00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:40,040
看來要由我這個輩份最高的叔公<br/>來說明了

186
00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:43,840
你可別告訴我, 張阿齊就是喬柏高

187
00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:44,600
錯

188
00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:46,840
應該是喬柏高就是張阿齊

189
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:52,520
因為…我們做廚師的<br/>其實也跟藝人一樣的

190
00:10:52,680 --> 00:10:53,960
也很重視形象和包裝的

191
00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:55,640
廚師除了要煮好食物之外

192
00:10:55,760 --> 00:10:58,360
還要靠形象和包裝來留住客人的

193
00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:00,480
客人才開心, 不過也很容易變心

194
00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:03,080
所以有名氣的廚師呢<br/>就算已經結了婚了

195
00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:05,320
也不得不繼續搞地下情<br/>繼續單身的

196
00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:07,480
對…

197
00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,320
冒充單身, 不用連名字也改呀

198
00:11:10,560 --> 00:11:11,200
要

199
00:11:11,760 --> 00:11:13,520
改名是因為八字的問題

200
00:11:15,360 --> 00:11:17,160
三一三六一六, 四一得四

201
00:11:17,360 --> 00:11:19,240
阿齊的命格屬火

202
00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:22,520
可是張阿齊這三個字呢是屬水的

203
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:24,440
所謂水火不相容

204
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:27,480
因此我馬上給他改了個藝名<br/>叫喬柏高

205
00:11:28,760 --> 00:11:31,720
果然木就生火, 火是越燒越旺

206
00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:33,720
所以柏高改了名之後

207
00:11:33,920 --> 00:11:36,480
皇室玫瑰的生意越來越好了

208
00:11:37,040 --> 00:11:38,360
是呀

209
00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:41,040
精采…VERY GOOD

210
00:11:41,920 --> 00:11:43,280
真的假的

211
00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:45,640
別不相信

212
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:49,000
名字好不好影響命運的

213
00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:51,480
是呀<br/>你們別開心得太早

214
00:11:51,720 --> 00:11:52,440
幹甚麼

215
00:11:52,560 --> 00:11:53,320
看看這是甚麼

216
00:11:53,680 --> 00:11:54,400
這甚麼

217
00:11:54,560 --> 00:12:00,400
這是我在你們房間裡翻出來的所謂<br/>夏威夷蜜月錄影帶

218
00:12:06,880 --> 00:12:07,640
這是甚麼

219
00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:10,880
其…其實呢…

220
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:13,640
其實呢, 這盒錄影帶只是道具

221
00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:17,120
根本就沒有夏威夷蜜月錄影帶

222
00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:23,680
閃電…閃電傳真機呀, 好久沒看了

223
00:12:25,920 --> 00:12:27,680
那個甚麼夏威夷錄影帶

224
00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:30,600
甚麼蜜月錄影帶放在皇室玫瑰了

225
00:12:30,720 --> 00:12:31,880
不知道甚麼時候掉亂了

226
00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:35,600
叔公說是就是了, 是, 一定是

227
00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:36,720
對…<br/>是呀

228
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:38,520
好, 我就給你們一天的時間

229
00:12:38,640 --> 00:12:41,440
看你們怎麼把錄影帶變出來

230
00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:52,240
夏威夷, 這裡就是夏威夷了

231
00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:57,400
好美呀…

232
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:00,320
津津

233
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:04,120
夏威夷真是山明水秀

234
00:13:04,440 --> 00:13:06,560
人傑地靈

235
00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:08,520
CUT

236
00:13:09,160 --> 00:13:11,160
CUT…CUT啦…

237
00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:13,280
甚麼事？導演

238
00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:14,800
怎麼了

239
00:13:14,880 --> 00:13:15,440
就是呀

240
00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:16,760
大家特地來這裡拍攝

241
00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:18,920
你是怎麼了？認真一點好不好

242
00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:20,560
我照你的吩咐做了

243
00:13:20,720 --> 00:13:22,440
我多投入, 指來指去的

244
00:13:23,160 --> 00:13:24,560
田師傅, 你自己看看吧

245
00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:25,440
看甚麼

246
00:13:25,520 --> 00:13:26,160
看到沒有

247
00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:27,760
你們是演情侶旅客

248
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:29,240
怎麼跟殺父仇人似的

249
00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:31,560
是她呀, 她揑我, 你看清楚了

250
00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:35,200
你們兩個不用演了, 扣五十…

251
00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:36,520
還有你呀…

252
00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:37,920
又怎麼了？導演

253
00:13:38,040 --> 00:13:38,640
你出來

254
00:13:38,760 --> 00:13:40,680
夏威夷, 美麗的夏威夷

255
00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:41,720
這就行啦

256
00:13:41,840 --> 00:13:42,960
我以為誇張一點更好嘛

257
00:13:43,160 --> 00:13:45,040
太誇張就變成假的了, 明白嗎

258
00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:46,240
扣五十

259
00:13:46,560 --> 00:13:48,080
對了, 師父<br/>又扣錢

260
00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:49,240
怎麼說話的時候

261
00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:51,360
甚麼山明水秀、人傑地靈

262
00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:53,000
老是板著臉孔說話呀

263
00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:55,200
我說話一向就這樣

264
00:13:55,320 --> 00:13:56,560
你來了夏威夷很開心

265
00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:59,320
山明水秀, 人傑地靈才對嘛

266
00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:01,320
你不要再說他了<br/>我們繼續拍好不好

267
00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:02,000
來…

268
00:14:02,240 --> 00:14:04,280
夏威夷, 夏…

269
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:06,640
CUT

270
00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:11,400
夏威夷好、夏威夷美、夏威夷妙

271
00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:16,600
CUT

272
00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:20,160
夏威夷太美了

273
00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:23,040
媽呀

274
00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:34,480
夏威夷真是山明…

275
00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:36,720
再來一個行不行

276
00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:37,840
行

277
00:14:38,960 --> 00:14:39,600
你說甚麼都行

278
00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:42,160
子華

279
00:14:42,920 --> 00:14:43,360
幹嘛

280
00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:44,800
好了沒有

281
00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:45,760
好了

282
00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:47,520
這盒是剪出來的NG片

283
00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:49,000
小心

284
00:14:49,200 --> 00:14:49,640
知道

285
00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:51,520
這盒是剪好了的精華片段

286
00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:53,240
剪出來的NG片

287
00:14:53,920 --> 00:14:54,720
剪接好了

288
00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:55,560
剪接好的

289
00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:57,520
CUT

290
00:14:57,840 --> 00:14:58,440
NG

291
00:14:58,840 --> 00:14:59,800
剪接精華

292
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:00,720
精華

293
00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:01,920
行了

294
00:15:02,240 --> 00:15:04,360
對了, 搞了一個晚上, 我睏死了

295
00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:06,000
早點睡

296
00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:09,640
子華

297
00:15:10,080 --> 00:15:10,880
行不行

298
00:15:10,920 --> 00:15:11,480
行

299
00:15:11,640 --> 00:15:12,240
行

300
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:12,880
行

301
00:15:16,760 --> 00:15:18,360
NG帶, 精華帶, NG帶

302
00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:21,000
幹嘛叫得這麼大聲

303
00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:22,120
害怕呀

304
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:23,120
害怕, 怕…

305
00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:23,840
這甚麼

306
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,440
是海底泥, 沒見過呀？大驚小怪

307
00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:29,560
不知道我這個油性皮膚<br/>能不能用海底泥呢

308
00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:31,040
變性都能用呀

309
00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:34,600
只要每天晚上敷一次, 每次十分鐘

310
00:15:34,840 --> 00:15:37,160
保證你粗皮變成細皮

311
00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:39,040
細皮能不能變鈔票

312
00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:41,800
牛頭不對馬嘴呀你

313
00:15:41,920 --> 00:15:43,920
你別打岔, 地上是甚麼帶子…

314
00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:47,320
太精采了

315
00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:50,240
你慢慢欣賞, 真的很有導演手法

316
00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:51,600
導演

317
00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:55,360
不是…我說拍的那個人<br/>簡直比導演還棒

318
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:57,840
比哪個導演還棒呀

319
00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:59,280
我也搞不清楚

320
00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:01,560
LOOK LOOK SEE SEE GOOD GOOD

321
00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:02,480
拜拜

322
00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:05,040
這小子鬼鬼祟祟的

323
00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:11,600
夏威夷真是山…

324
00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:15,480
能不能再來一個<br/>再來一個吧

325
00:16:17,080 --> 00:16:19,160
夏威夷真是山…

326
00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:21,080
再來一個吧

327
00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:26,040
我這次終於人贓並獲, 捉姦在床

328
00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:29,520
參見師父

329
00:16:29,680 --> 00:16:32,720
徒兒已經把錄影帶交到女魔頭手上

330
00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:34,600
終於逃過大難了

331
00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:36,720
平身

332
00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:37,520
謝師父

333
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:41,760
看來這次我們可以順利過關了吧

334
00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:45,080
你不是有兩盒錄影帶嗎

335
00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:47,960
對呀, 一盒是剪出來的NG帶

336
00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:52,360
另外一盒是匯集各位演員<br/>精華所在的好帶

337
00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:54,760
好帶你已經拿給姑姑看了

338
00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:56,600
那麼NG帶在哪裡呢

339
00:16:57,320 --> 00:16:59,400
這…糟了, 還在樓下

340
00:17:02,040 --> 00:17:02,760
你徒弟呀

341
00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:14,040
夏威夷真是山明水秀, 地傑人靈了

342
00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:16,600
你開不開心

343
00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:17,640
我好開心

344
00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:18,800
我們好開心

345
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:20,920
津津

346
00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:22,720
你看你那個時候胖好多

347
00:17:23,080 --> 00:17:24,520
阿齊也夠黑的了

348
00:17:25,120 --> 00:17:25,800
是嗎

349
00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:27,800
是的…

350
00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:29,080
我覺得他們沒甚麼變

351
00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:30,520
是嗎

352
00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:31,880
是吧

353
00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:34,120
是也好、不是也好

354
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:36,640
總而言之我覺得他們真的有夫妻相

355
00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:39,120
你也覺得？我也覺得

356
00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:40,560
你們有呀

357
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:41,200
是嗎

358
00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:43,200
是的…

359
00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:48,720
津津, 吃葡萄也剝皮, 你嘴巴真刁

360
00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:49,720
你不知道, 姑姑

361
00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:52,240
阿齊吃葡萄不喜歡吃皮的

362
00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:54,040
如果我不幫他剝皮的話

363
00:17:54,360 --> 00:17:55,640
他就不肯吃了

364
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:59,200
想不到你演戲也演得很投入

365
00:18:01,040 --> 00:18:04,400
你姑姑是出了名善於察言觀色<br/>聰明可愛

366
00:18:04,840 --> 00:18:07,280
你用赤柱海灘冒充夏威夷<br/>我會相信嗎

367
00:18:09,160 --> 00:18:10,800
你是女孩子甚麼不好扮

368
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:13,040
扮人家老婆這種事你也做

369
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:15,600
姑姑, 我求求你<br/>千萬別告訴爸爸媽媽

370
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,640
因為他們會逼我回加拿大的

371
00:18:18,360 --> 00:18:20,280
現在不是姑姑幫不幫你的問題

372
00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:22,440
而是究竟那個阿齊

373
00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:25,120
也就是喬柏高跟你是甚麼關係

374
00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:29,080
甚麼關係？是普通朋友的關係囉

375
00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:31,880
那你想不想有進一步的關係呢

376
00:18:32,760 --> 00:18:34,200
姑姑你不要瞎說

377
00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:37,000
姑姑不是瞎說, 你先告訴我

378
00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:43,800
我數三下你都不說, 是真的那個啦

379
00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:47,200
事到如今我們只有一條路可以走

380
00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:48,800
甚麼路

381
00:18:49,120 --> 00:18:51,760
就是來一招戲假情真

382
00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:53,960
跟著假戲真做

383
00:18:54,360 --> 00:18:57,160
到時候他就跑不出你的手掌心了

384
00:18:57,800 --> 00:18:59,880
姑姑, 求神拜佛你千萬別亂來

385
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:02,560
我只想瞞著爸爸媽媽<br/>瞞到他們回加拿大就算了

386
00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:03,680
你真的不玩

387
00:19:05,360 --> 00:19:07,040
真真正正不玩

388
00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:09,120
真真正正不玩

389
00:19:10,240 --> 00:19:14,800
如果你不玩的話<br/>只有我自己一個人來玩吧

390
00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:18,360
早

391
00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:20,360
津津, 恭喜你…

392
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:21,400
恭喜

393
00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:25,240
津津, 早, 恭喜…<br/>恭喜你…

394
00:19:25,360 --> 00:19:26,120
恭喜…

395
00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:26,880
恭喜我

396
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,960
當然了, 那麼開心的事<br/>當然要恭喜你了對不對

397
00:19:29,360 --> 00:19:29,960
恭喜我

398
00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:32,000
津津

399
00:19:32,640 --> 00:19:33,240
津津

400
00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:35,120
幹嘛

401
00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:36,040
你到底搞甚麼鬼

402
00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:38,000
我問你們搞甚麼鬼才對

403
00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:39,840
個個都像中了邪似的恭喜我幹甚麼

404
00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:42,160
你跟柏高只是演戲

405
00:19:42,320 --> 00:19:44,520
不用認真得要發帖子請吃喜酒

406
00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:48,320
你還愣在那裡幹甚麼？你自己看

407
00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:50,920
婚禮在下個星期天

408
00:19:53,240 --> 00:19:55,400
下個星期天, 喬柏高、夏津津

409
00:19:56,760 --> 00:19:57,560
姑姑

410
00:19:59,040 --> 00:20:01,200
別拉著我, 放手<br/>小勁, 你別這樣好不好

411
00:20:02,280 --> 00:20:03,480
聽我說, 師父, 你想想

412
00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:05,200
那個三八擺明是耍你們

413
00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:08,280
明明已經穿幫了, 還要把事情鬧大<br/>存心給我們難堪

414
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:10,600
我找人扁她, 我找人扁她好不好

415
00:20:10,880 --> 00:20:12,280
小勁, 你冷靜點好不好

416
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:14,560
女人本來就難以捉摸的

417
00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:17,240
變態女人你更加捉摸不透了

418
00:20:17,520 --> 00:20:18,120
就是呀

419
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:22,320
師父, 都是我不好, 我沒有用

420
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:25,520
都怪我想出那個餿主意, 師父

421
00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:27,800
算了…起來吧…

422
00:20:27,920 --> 00:20:29,120
現在我們被人擺了一道

423
00:20:29,440 --> 00:20:31,360
快點想辦法如何善後吧

424
00:20:33,920 --> 00:20:34,760
這樣好了

425
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:38,480
由我…我去跟他們解釋清楚<br/>這樣好不好

426
00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:39,720
不行…

427
00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:42,360
要是我爸媽知道的話<br/>他一定會逼我回加拿大的

428
00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:43,680
千萬不能說

429
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:47,480
這也不行, 那也不行<br/>難道真的要我跟你結婚呀

430
00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:50,800
不失為一個好辦法<br/>是呀

431
00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:51,760
津津你的看法呢

432
00:20:52,800 --> 00:20:54,480
這種事, 別問我嘛

433
00:20:55,800 --> 00:20:58,040
這個時候你們別玩了好不好

434
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:00,760
不是呀師父, 我突然有一個想法

435
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:03,800
在這種情況下既然你們騎虎難下了

436
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:05,800
乾脆繼續下去吧

437
00:21:05,880 --> 00:21:06,520
對…

438
00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:08,320
說了等於沒說

439
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:09,400
不是呀

440
00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:12,120
你想想, 一個硬幣有兩面

441
00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:13,840
我們就從這面看

442
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:16,560
大家去吃喜酒, 新郎新娘敬酒了

443
00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:17,200
對…

444
00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:18,400
又開心又熱鬧, 另外一面

445
00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:20,200
大家就當多幾個人一塊吃飯

446
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:22,240
多做一些門面功夫, 沒問題

447
00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:24,920
對, 他說得非常有道理

448
00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:28,200
可是我總覺得有點問題

449
00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:30,160
你有甚麼問題？津津你怎麼樣

450
00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:33,320
嗯就是沒問題

451
00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:35,960
女方沒問題, 男方別扭扭揑揑的了

452
00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:37,400
還好, 搞定

453
00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:40,800
甚麼事

454
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:43,560
別亂來

455
00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:44,960
小勁…

456
00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:47,720
這一群是甚麼人

457
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:49,560
是隔壁那家學校的女學生

458
00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:52,120
好像沒見過男生似的, 簡直快瘋了

459
00:21:52,400 --> 00:21:53,920
你看她們把師父都給包圍了

460
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:57,880
對了, 她們還說要搞<br/>那個甚麼廚迷會？神經病

461
00:21:58,720 --> 00:22:01,120
別亂來, 幹甚麼？別…別亂來

462
00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:05,160
你們檢點一點, 檢點一點…

463
00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:07,440
你這麼緊張幹甚麼？他是你老公呀

464
00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:09,120
正是

465
00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:15,480
大家不用失望

466
00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:17,640
你看看我, 長得也不賴

467
00:22:19,520 --> 00:22:21,520
我還有腹肌呢, 我…

468
00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:24,720
人都走了

469
00:22:25,440 --> 00:22:26,440
我…

470
00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:28,920
把門帶上

471
00:22:31,840 --> 00:22:32,640
掉下去了

472
00:22:35,080 --> 00:22:36,400
爸爸、媽

473
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:38,280
怎麼桌上這麼多金器首飾

474
00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:41,960
親戚朋友們太客氣了<br/>一接到帖子馬上就送禮物過來了

475
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:44,440
還說那天要早點來幫忙

476
00:22:45,360 --> 00:22:47,400
不要緊吧？這麼快就收禮了

477
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:50,480
遲早的事, 難道人家送來<br/>我們把人家趕走

478
00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:51,280
可是…

479
00:22:51,520 --> 00:22:53,320
可是甚麼？你們結婚沒請吃喜酒

480
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:55,360
親戚朋友們都不知道你們結婚了

481
00:22:55,960 --> 00:22:59,000
這次請二十桌酒席<br/>就當爸爸給你們的結婚禮物

482
00:22:59,920 --> 00:23:00,880
你們不用介意的

483
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:03,400
年輕人懂得節約是對的

484
00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:06,240
我們兩個老人家的錢又帶不進棺材

485
00:23:06,360 --> 00:23:08,600
總之喜宴搞得風光熱鬧就行了

486
00:23:08,920 --> 00:23:10,080
爸爸媽媽, 其實我…

487
00:23:10,160 --> 00:23:12,000
其實這條項鍊是表姨父送的

488
00:23:12,360 --> 00:23:13,520
爹地媽咪其實呢…

489
00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:16,480
其實呢<br/>我說大舅舅送的金豬更漂亮

490
00:23:17,840 --> 00:23:18,960
爸爸媽媽, 其實我…

491
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:22,400
其實, 我說老婆<br/>你要記得打電話給英國的七姨父

492
00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:24,120
爹地媽咪其實呢…

493
00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:25,760
我忘記告訴你們了

494
00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:28,280
四川的六伯公打電話來

495
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:30,680
他說要辦手續來香港吃喜酒

496
00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:31,800
六伯公要來呀

497
00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:32,440
是呀

498
00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:35,120
那要記得請七八九十叔公來

499
00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:36,520
我的媽呀

500
00:23:36,640 --> 00:23:37,320
找到了

501
00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:38,080
找到了

502
00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:40,480
我特地叫你姑姑<br/>把照相機找出來給我拍照

503
00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:42,400
這張照片我想拍想瘋了

504
00:23:42,520 --> 00:23:45,640
照相呀<br/>來…拍照吧…

505
00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:46,560
拍甚麼？甚麼事

506
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:48,120
準備好了沒有

507
00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:49,320
一二三

508
00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:01,720
姑姑你給我進來

509
00:24:03,520 --> 00:24:04,800
你幹甚麼呀

510
00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:06,840
我問你幹甚麼

511
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:08,320
你說不玩我就自己玩囉

512
00:24:08,840 --> 00:24:11,080
玩？你發帖子請吃喜酒叫玩嗎

513
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:12,960
你明知道我跟柏高是演戲

514
00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:16,440
茶包放在水杯裡面會越泡越濃

515
00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:19,480
我不相信一男一女相處久了<br/>不會發生真感情

516
00:24:20,760 --> 00:24:22,680
姑姑現在打一張好牌給你上

517
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:24,320
十二張下地

518
00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:26,560
能不能和牌就看你自己了

519
00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:29,360
怕的是和不了還要放銃給三家

520
00:24:29,680 --> 00:24:30,760
那你不相信姑姑囉

521
00:24:32,080 --> 00:24:33,920
我不是不相信你, 姑姑你明不明白

522
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:36,440
有些事情是不可以硬來的<br/>不可以勉強的

523
00:24:36,680 --> 00:24:38,480
錯, 因為感情是可以的

524
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:40,920
雖然你們是少了一張結婚證書

525
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:45,320
可是請吃喜酒就如假包換<br/>錦上添花

526
00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:47,280
不行呀

527
00:24:47,880 --> 00:24:50,480
我裝得再像有甚麼用<br/>柏高始終不是我的老公

528
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:53,760
男人是一種很容易投入角色的動物

529
00:24:54,040 --> 00:24:56,240
只要這齣戲劇情逼真

530
00:24:56,520 --> 00:24:58,520
他一投入角色的時候你就…

531
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:04,360
不可以, 我不可以騙我爸爸媽媽

532
00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:06,040
你考慮清楚了嗎

533
00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:08,120
我考慮得很清楚了

534
00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:09,760
我再給你一分鐘好好的考慮

535
00:25:10,440 --> 00:25:11,720
好, 一分鐘

536
00:25:12,640 --> 00:25:13,440
可是你要換衣服

537
00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:15,040
換衣服

538
00:25:23,680 --> 00:25:26,600
沒一個女人可以抗拒得了<br/>穿褂裙的魔力

539
00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:36,160
津津

540
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:42,480
我喬柏高今生只有津津你一個妻子

541
00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:46,560
決不有異, 如有違誓, 天誅地滅

542
00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:48,560
柏高

543
00:25:49,360 --> 00:25:50,040
津津

544
00:25:58,160 --> 00:26:01,640
一分鐘時間到了, 你考慮得怎麼樣

545
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:09,040
做人一定要有始有終的

546
00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:12,480
演戲當然要演全套了

547
00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:18,240
你不要老是看著地上, 眼睛看前面

548
00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:19,760
對了…

549
00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:23,240
不好意思, 對不起<br/>小心點

550
00:26:23,360 --> 00:26:25,520
沒關係…再來…

551
00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:32,720
告訴你不要看腳了, 是看前面

552
00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:36,960
對不起…

553
00:26:37,280 --> 00:26:38,520
沒關係…

554
00:26:39,120 --> 00:26:41,600
對不起, 修哥, 不好意思

555
00:26:42,000 --> 00:26:44,280
沒關係…歇會兒就沒事了

556
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:47,800
不要騙自己了, 有兩百磅重

557
00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:50,080
連著踩幾腳, 歇會兒沒事了

558
00:26:50,160 --> 00:26:51,640
你夠了

559
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,240
修哥, 不知道為甚麼

560
00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:56,840
我不低頭就會跳得亂七八糟的

561
00:26:58,000 --> 00:27:00,840
所有初學的學生<br/>通常都有這個毛病的

562
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:03,840
看看這個儀器能不能幫你

563
00:27:06,280 --> 00:27:07,920
這是甚麼, 助聽器？

564
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:09,720
你戴到耳朵上就知道了

565
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:14,360
怎麼樣

566
00:27:15,640 --> 00:27:17,040
你現在把硬幣拿給我看

567
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:20,320
怎麼會這樣

568
00:27:20,840 --> 00:27:22,760
你看看你, 整天待在餐廳裡面

569
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:24,240
這是新科技

570
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,960
專門為初學跳舞的人設計的

571
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:30,080
改掉他們低頭、看腳的毛病

572
00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:33,120
我來吧

573
00:27:39,320 --> 00:27:39,880
行了

574
00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:42,840
不過你平常要記得戴著練習

575
00:27:48,560 --> 00:27:50,320
漢堡牛排

576
00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:53,160
請慢用

577
00:27:55,160 --> 00:27:56,560
這裡也一樣, 也…

578
00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:01,320
也是漢堡牛排, 請慢用

579
00:28:03,560 --> 00:28:05,040
請你過來一下, 給我寫寫

580
00:28:05,520 --> 00:28:07,320
好呀, 先生, 想吃甚麼

581
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:09,320
我要龍蝦湯

582
00:28:09,480 --> 00:28:10,040
好

583
00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:13,200
龍蝦湯, 還有呢

584
00:28:13,560 --> 00:28:15,440
還有白菌燴龍脷

585
00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:18,240
白菌燴龍脷

586
00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:19,880
行, 沒有了吧

587
00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:21,440
馬上給你做

588
00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:22,960
等一下

589
00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:24,200
甚麼事

590
00:28:24,440 --> 00:28:26,720
我知道我穿得很寒酸

591
00:28:27,360 --> 00:28:29,960
可是你也不要那麼現實給我臉色看

592
00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:31,040
我有錢付帳的

593
00:28:31,160 --> 00:28:33,560
沒…沒有, 我怎麼敢給你臉色看

594
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:34,640
還說沒有

595
00:28:34,960 --> 00:28:37,920
你寫單子那麼久<br/>有沒有低頭看過我一眼

596
00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:40,360
你的眼睛是不是長在額頭上

597
00:28:40,520 --> 00:28:42,760
你別誤會…好…

598
00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:49,280
那麼我這樣, 你的氣消了沒有

599
00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:53,600
神經病, 快走…

600
00:28:53,720 --> 00:28:54,840
先生<br/>肥姨

601
00:28:55,120 --> 00:28:56,160
肥姨你沒事吧

602
00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:56,880
肥姨

603
00:29:00,560 --> 00:29:01,200
肥姨

604
00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:08,320
誰有肥姨厲害

605
00:29:09,600 --> 00:29:10,440
肥胰怎麼厲害

606
00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:12,480
她為了學跳舞, 連客人也趕跑了

607
00:29:12,760 --> 00:29:13,880
你說肥姨厲不厲害

608
00:29:14,320 --> 00:29:16,000
肥姨再厲害也沒你厲害, 師父

609
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:17,440
是嗎？為甚麼

610
00:29:17,560 --> 00:29:19,680
肥姨是為了學跳舞把客人趕跑了

611
00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:20,920
可是你不是呀

612
00:29:21,080 --> 00:29:23,480
你是沒理由也能搞大師叔的肚子

613
00:29:23,880 --> 00:29:24,920
你說你是不是最厲害

614
00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:31,520
第十八屆香港舞蹈比賽初賽

615
00:29:31,640 --> 00:29:32,840
現在正式開始

616
00:29:51,480 --> 00:29:52,400
肥姨…<br/>媽媽

617
00:29:55,240 --> 00:29:57,560
媽媽…你好漂亮<br/>肥姨

618
00:29:58,240 --> 00:30:02,480
肥姨必勝…

619
00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:04,240
比賽現在正式開始

620
00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:07,840
媽媽必勝, 加油

621
00:30:08,880 --> 00:30:09,400
音樂

622
00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:26,920
沒事…

623
00:31:56,400 --> 00:31:58,800
肥姨好棒…

624
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:03,160
媽媽, 你跳得好棒

625
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:04,280
可是我好緊張

626
00:32:04,360 --> 00:32:07,280
跳得好, 好…一定贏<br/>好緊張…

627
00:32:09,120 --> 00:32:10,200
結果已經出來了

628
00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:12,160
以下唸出來的組合

629
00:32:12,320 --> 00:32:14,480
可以繼續下星期的決賽

630
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:17,800
13號

631
00:32:20,040 --> 00:32:20,840
17號

632
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:23,440
18號…

633
00:32:23,520 --> 00:32:24,200
5號

634
00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:27,240
15號

635
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:29,160
22號

636
00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:36,200
媽媽, 還有機會, 會有的

637
00:32:37,280 --> 00:32:38,920
最後一組, 18號

638
00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:51,560
媽媽, 恭喜你, 太棒了

639
00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:54,840
媽媽, 你剛才跳舞跳得真好

640
00:32:55,200 --> 00:32:56,600
好得連我都不敢相信了

641
00:32:57,480 --> 00:33:00,520
那當然了<br/>媽媽還有很多花式沒出呢

642
00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:01,520
好棒呀

643
00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:04,680
我剛才差一點拉不住你<br/>我還以為完了呢

644
00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:07,480
肥姨辛苦了那麼久<br/>終於有了回報了

645
00:33:07,760 --> 00:33:09,720
這樣吧, 東主有喜, 今天休息一天

646
00:33:10,680 --> 00:33:11,440
那怎麼行

647
00:33:11,640 --> 00:33:12,800
好棒…<br/>小事嘛

648
00:33:16,240 --> 00:33:16,880
爸爸

649
00:33:20,680 --> 00:33:22,480
記得把制服洗乾淨

650
00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:25,000
美味園的廚房等著你的

651
00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:28,280
你看你, 你…你真是

652
00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:32,360
我們…我們還是走吧

653
00:33:53,520 --> 00:33:56,160
該鹹不鹹, 該甜不甜<br/>這是人吃的嗎

654
00:33:56,840 --> 00:33:59,920
對不起…我叫廚房重新做吧<br/>保證你一定滿意

655
00:34:00,120 --> 00:34:00,760
快點

656
00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:03,120
對不起

657
00:34:10,400 --> 00:34:11,640
小弟弟, 幾個人

658
00:34:12,640 --> 00:34:15,920
小姐, 我是一九六四年<br/>一月十三日出生的

659
00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:17,640
今年三十三歲

660
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:20,200
不管身高體型都已經發育完成

661
00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:23,040
裡裡外外都熟透了的男人<br/>還叫小弟弟呀

662
00:34:23,960 --> 00:34:25,480
那大男人, 幾個人呀

663
00:34:26,320 --> 00:34:27,720
我來找你們大廚長毛

664
00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:29,280
長毛

665
00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:32,960
頭髮長長的, 滿臉鬍子<br/>有點像麻原彰晃

666
00:34:33,480 --> 00:34:34,680
田師傅是不是

667
00:34:35,080 --> 00:34:35,840
田師傅

668
00:34:35,880 --> 00:34:37,640
他去買貨了, 你坐一下等他吧

669
00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:45,880
乖…

670
00:34:49,840 --> 00:34:50,840
你也養雞呀？大塊頭

671
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:54,480
別提了, 不知道為甚麼我養雞<br/>不到兩歲就死了

672
00:34:55,240 --> 00:34:56,400
這種雞很容易死的

673
00:34:56,600 --> 00:34:58,680
拉屎不清理會死, 不唸書也會死

674
00:34:58,840 --> 00:34:59,760
坐下來研究

675
00:34:59,880 --> 00:35:00,280
好…

676
00:35:00,400 --> 00:35:01,320
這隻雞很難養的, 你看

677
00:35:01,760 --> 00:35:02,680
大雄

678
00:35:03,120 --> 00:35:04,040
來了, 肥姨

679
00:35:05,840 --> 00:35:08,640
這叫甚麼餐廳<br/>煮這麼難吃的東西給客人吃

680
00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:10,080
我家那隻狗也不要吃

681
00:35:11,320 --> 00:35:12,480
太過份了

682
00:35:14,360 --> 00:35:16,280
食物是我們最基本的需要

683
00:35:16,960 --> 00:35:20,240
我們的生命能夠維持下去全靠食物

684
00:35:20,960 --> 00:35:23,880
所以食物根本就是我們的再生父母

685
00:35:24,720 --> 00:35:26,080
不管它有多難看

686
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:27,960
我們也需要尊重食物

687
00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:31,240
請你立刻跟這盤炒飯道歉

688
00:35:32,560 --> 00:35:33,280
對不起

689
00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:37,000
不夠誠意, 飯還在冒氣哪

690
00:35:38,120 --> 00:35:39,240
對不起炒飯

691
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:44,240
好, 現在請你充滿感情的吃了它

692
00:35:46,160 --> 00:35:47,080
甚麼事這麼吵

693
00:35:50,040 --> 00:35:52,600
爽爽, 你怎麼在這兒

694
00:35:56,880 --> 00:35:58,480
他們好像認識的樣子<br/>對呀

695
00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:01,080
爽爽…

696
00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:03,440
你幹甚麼？放手<br/>我的手快被你拉斷了

697
00:36:04,240 --> 00:36:05,000
你幹嘛

698
00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:06,840
我…

699
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:09,640
我看到你太高興了, 師父

700
00:36:10,720 --> 00:36:13,160
我把你拉出來, 因為…

701
00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:15,480
太陽底下看到你的樣子更清楚了嘛

702
00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:18,200
爽爽, 想不到你這麼關心師父

703
00:36:18,640 --> 00:36:20,520
這樣吧, 等我有空去加洗照片

704
00:36:20,640 --> 00:36:23,360
給你放在皮夾子裡<br/>時時刻刻都能看到我了, 好不好

705
00:36:23,920 --> 00:36:25,320
好…那最好了

706
00:36:26,600 --> 00:36:27,240
師父

707
00:36:28,080 --> 00:36:29,920
你怎麼突然跑回香港來了

708
00:36:30,720 --> 00:36:34,720
因為師父當了法國童軍總會<br/>世界之旅的伙頭總顧問

709
00:36:35,160 --> 00:36:37,760
第一站是香港<br/>所以順便回來看看你們師兄妹了

710
00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:38,640
長毛呢

711
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:41,200
師…師父

712
00:36:41,720 --> 00:36:44,400
我覺得你這個童軍造型好帥氣

713
00:36:44,600 --> 00:36:45,200
是嗎

714
00:36:45,600 --> 00:36:48,440
這是資深童軍造型, 你師兄呢

715
00:36:49,480 --> 00:36:52,240
可是, 我覺得你的帽子<br/>好像是大了一點

716
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:53,760
你師兄呢

717
00:36:54,960 --> 00:36:57,800
師兄…師兄他…

718
00:36:57,880 --> 00:36:59,000
他

719
00:36:59,160 --> 00:36:59,520
他…

720
00:36:59,640 --> 00:37:00,400
進去等他吧

721
00:37:00,440 --> 00:37:02,920
不…你等不到他了

722
00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:04,880
為甚麼

723
00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:08,800
他…他已經失蹤半年了

724
00:37:09,760 --> 00:37:10,880
沒有他的消息

725
00:37:11,360 --> 00:37:13,720
我看他是凶多吉少了

726
00:37:15,920 --> 00:37:17,200
一山他死了

727
00:37:18,240 --> 00:37:19,960
沒十成也有九成半了

728
00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:23,120
我看他已經被人毀屍滅跡了

729
00:37:24,880 --> 00:37:26,040
為甚麼會這樣

730
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:29,400
一山這個人, 沒甚麼

731
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:32,360
只不過是有點土土的

732
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:34,600
窩窩囊囊, 加上好色

733
00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:37,240
為甚麼會有這種下場

734
00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:41,320
我見到他的時候<br/>我就覺得有點奇怪了

735
00:37:42,160 --> 00:37:44,120
他說自己叫甚麼田味吉

736
00:37:45,480 --> 00:37:46,200
等一等

737
00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:54,160
為甚麼死了？我的小雞為甚麼死了

738
00:37:56,680 --> 00:38:00,040
小雞, 你醒醒, 你別扔下我一個

739
00:38:00,920 --> 00:38:01,560
師父

740
00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:02,800
醒醒呀

741
00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:04,520
你死了一隻小雞嘛

742
00:38:08,040 --> 00:38:10,320
我說師兄死了你也好像沒這麼激動

743
00:38:13,120 --> 00:38:13,960
爽爽

744
00:38:14,480 --> 00:38:16,560
我現在沒心情跟你說話了

745
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:20,360
我住在童軍總會

746
00:38:20,840 --> 00:38:22,880
你…你有事才來找我

747
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:35,680
你喝不了的

748
00:38:36,720 --> 00:38:37,800
這口我替你喝了

749
00:38:57,240 --> 00:38:58,320
嗨, 這麼巧

750
00:39:00,080 --> 00:39:01,360
嗨, 這麼巧

751
00:39:03,320 --> 00:39:04,480
嗨, 這麼巧呀

752
00:39:52,640 --> 00:39:54,120
小弟弟, 你沒事吧

753
00:40:00,680 --> 00:40:01,880
快把臉擦擦吧

754
00:40:02,520 --> 00:40:03,400
我？

755
00:40:22,760 --> 00:40:23,920
美味園

756
00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:31,080
居然會穿幫, 怎麼這麼倒楣

757
00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:34,320
趕快溜了<br/>要不然等師兄見到師父就糟了

758
00:40:34,640 --> 00:40:35,680
完蛋了…

759
00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:39,840
拿著箱子去哪裡

760
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:42,600
師兄, 我已經訂了機票

761
00:40:42,880 --> 00:40:44,880
今天我們就去法國拜師父

762
00:40:46,120 --> 00:40:47,160
怎麼走得這麼急

763
00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:49,160
就是, 你不是怕小吉不能坐飛機嗎

764
00:40:49,360 --> 00:40:49,880
對呀

765
00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:51,680
師兄

766
00:40:52,040 --> 00:40:52,760
幹嘛

767
00:40:53,080 --> 00:40:54,600
師父昨天晚上託夢給我

768
00:40:54,720 --> 00:40:57,200
問我們知不知道<br/>甚麼叫做尊師重道這四個字

769
00:40:58,160 --> 00:40:59,200
我想了一個晚上

770
00:40:59,400 --> 00:41:01,080
師父對我們恩重如山

771
00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:05,480
我認為我們應該去磕個頭, 上炷香

772
00:41:07,200 --> 00:41:08,120
你說得對

773
00:41:09,440 --> 00:41:10,560
可是小吉…

774
00:41:10,720 --> 00:41:12,840
你放心吧, 小吉會聽話的

775
00:41:13,440 --> 00:41:15,040
是呀, 師父, 美味園就交給我吧

776
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:16,200
你放心去拜師公吧

777
00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:19,320
可是我要跟肥姨說一聲

778
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:20,600
那你快去快回吧

779
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:21,520
那走吧

780
00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:28,680
甚麼, 你要去法國一個星期

781
00:41:28,960 --> 00:41:29,760
不錯

782
00:41:30,080 --> 00:41:31,760
雖然我是在外國學廚的

783
00:41:32,480 --> 00:41:35,080
可是我仍然保留<br/>中國優良傳統的美德

784
00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:36,800
就是尊師重道

785
00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:40,480
肥姨, 我一拜祭完師父<br/>就馬上趕回來

786
00:41:41,160 --> 00:41:43,320
那小丁一個搞不搞得定廚房

787
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:46,120
放心吧, 小丁跟了我那麼久

788
00:41:46,360 --> 00:41:49,040
不要說一個美味園的廚房<br/>就算十個也搞得定

789
00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:52,240
對了, 昨天有個童子軍, 他…

790
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:56,080
人有三急, 等我出來再說下一句

791
00:41:57,640 --> 00:41:58,960
廁所的燈有點毛病

792
00:42:02,840 --> 00:42:04,760
童子軍, 你今天又來找人呀

793
00:42:05,080 --> 00:42:06,160
今天是來等人的

794
00:42:06,720 --> 00:42:07,760
等人

795
00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:09,360
你等甚麼人

796
00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:10,560
我不知道

797
00:42:11,440 --> 00:42:13,400
你不知道等甚麼人, 那你還說等人

798
00:42:13,680 --> 00:42:14,160
就是呀

799
00:42:14,280 --> 00:42:15,360
我沒時間解釋給你們聽

800
00:42:15,720 --> 00:42:16,840
請你給我一杯冰水

801
00:42:17,040 --> 00:42:18,960
然後就不用管我, 當我隱形就行了

802
00:42:20,200 --> 00:42:20,840
糟了

803
00:42:21,160 --> 00:42:22,000
你幹甚麼

804
00:42:22,400 --> 00:42:23,160
人有三急

805
00:42:25,280 --> 00:42:25,960
幫我盯著大門口

806
00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:28,280
廁所的燈有點毛病

807
00:42:38,640 --> 00:42:40,920
你媽媽去改嫁

808
00:42:41,760 --> 00:42:44,040
嫁了個紅頭阿三

809
00:42:45,000 --> 00:42:47,880
生了一個小紅頭, 屁股有塊疤

810
00:42:52,760 --> 00:42:56,000
神奇大帝穿了個洞

811
00:42:56,480 --> 00:42:58,600
三位忠心戰士

812
00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:01,960
有個放屁、有個麻臉

813
00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:04,680
有個老子就快死

814
00:43:28,240 --> 00:43:29,240
鬼呀